Unexpected Results I: A Slight Glitch
by Samuraiko
Summary: The misadventures begin when Father Wordsworth, while in the midst of tinkering with his latest and greatest invention, hits a slight... glitch. And with the advent of Sister Johanna Sinclair, the AX’s newest recruit, the future will never be the same!
1. Well, THAT was unexpected!

_Note: "Unexpected Results" was my gleeful response to a friend's drabble challenge of:_

_"What would you do if you were walking down the sidewalk, got knocked upside on the head, and then woke up in a strange type of pod a millennia in the future - with Dr. William Walter Wordsworth peering down at you?"_

_The little story below was my response. It was so well-received on the TrinityBlood LiveJournal community that, well... you can see for yourself! _

_Enjoy! (BTW, there's a poll up for this in my LiveJournal and on the TrinityBlood LiveJournal community.)_

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**Unexpected Results**

**Me**: "My God, I've died and gone to heaven..."

**William Walter Wordsworth**: "Actually, you're in Rome. I'm William Walter Wordsworth, or simply Professor, if you like."

**Me**: "Holy..."

**WWW**: "Well, I am ordained, but I highly doubt that ordination makes me holy."

**Me**: "No, no, no... that's not what I meant. Nice pod, by the way."

**WWW**: "Thank you, it's my own design. I was actually working on a containment unit, but there was this strange power surge, and suddenly you were in there."

**Me**: "Would you mind letting me out?"

**WWW**: "Oh, of course, here, let me help you up."

**Gunslinger**: "Father Wordsworth, she is unauthorized personnel. Requesting explanation of your experiment."

**WWW**: "Ah, Father Tres! Um, well, my containment unit seems to have had a slightly unexpected glitch..."

**Sister Kate**: "Glitch? GLITCH?! You call an EM pulse they could detect in ALBION a GLITCH?!?"

**WWW**: "Um..."

**Father Havel**: "I'm impressed, William, I didn't realize you could spontaneously create human beings."

**Me**: "Excuse me, he didn't create me..."

**WWW**: "Absolutely right, I just happened to check the power readings on the pod and there she was."

**Abel**: "She who? Oh... Um, Professor..."

**Me**: "Wow, are all the priests here hot?"

**Gunslinger**: "Negative. None of the AX members currently present are experiencing higher than average body temperature."

**Father Havel**: "I don't think that's what she meant, Father Tres."

**WWW**: "But thank you very much for the compliment, young lady."

**Abel**: "Professor..."

**Gunslinger**: "Father Wordsworth, Cardinal Caterina is requesting that you join her in her office immediately. She demands an explanation for the results of your experiment."

**WWW**: "I'm sure with a little calibration, I can figure out what went wrong... maybe if I just adjust..."

**Father Havel**: "Don't touch that!!!"

**Me**: "Why, what could possibly-"

**All**: "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"

_To be continued_...


	2. Attempts at an Explanation

_Note: Like I'd said last chapter, originally "Unexpected Results" was meant to be a one-off. However, so many people enjoyed it that I decided to keep going. After all, why not? It's all in good fun..._

_Enjoy!_

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**Unexpected Results, Part 2**

**Caterina**: "Ah, Professor... I am most... curious to hear your explanation for the results of your earlier experiment."

**WWW**: "Well, Your Eminence, it appears that while I was calibrating the containment unit, there was a... slight glitch."

**Sister Kate**: "It was hardly a GLITCH, Your Eminence, he almost completely FRIED the _Iron Maiden_'s control systems!"

**WWW**: "That was an entirely unforeseen side effect of the recalibration..."

**Caterina**: "As was the appearance of this young woman, I take it."

**WWW**: "You could say that, yes."

**Caterina**: "And how exactly do you intend to explain the explosion in your office a few minutes ago?"

**WWW**: "Um..."

**Father Leon**: "Nice one, Professor, you may have finally beaten Father Four-Eyes' record for getting in trouble!"

**Abel**: "What's THAT supposed to mean?!"

**Caterina**: "Gentlemen, please! At any rate, what do you propose we do with her?"

**Me**: "Um... I take it sending me back is going to be difficult."

**Sister Kate**: "'Difficult' is not the word I would have chosen... IMPOSSIBLE is more like it, because if the Professor tries a stunt like that again, I'M GOING TO KILL HIM!"

**Caterina**: "Sister Kate, I realize that you are a bit annoyed with the Professor at the moment, but you do realize that murder is a violation of the Commandments..."

**Sister Kate**: "Consider yourself lucky, PROFESSOR."

**Abel**: "Your Eminence, perhaps the young woman should remain here for a few days while Father Wordsworth investigates other means of returning her to wherever she belongs. I mean, maybe she could be of some use to us."

**Father Havel**: "Please, Father Nightroad, I hardly think that she's going to be much help to the AX."

**Father Leon**: "Yeah, unless by a miracle she's a programmer in Lost Technology or something..."

**Me**: "What, you mean like a computer programmer?"

**Abel**: "Exactly."

**Me**: "Oh, that's easy."

**Father Havel**: "I beg your pardon."

**Me**: "I'm a computer geek."

**Gunslinger**: "Request explanation for the term 'geek.'"

**Me**: "An expert, a specialist, someone whose primary professional skills and technical knowledge relate to a given field. Explanation enough for you? Jeez, are you always this literal?"

**Gunslinger**: "Positive."

**Me**: "Yeah, well... before I woke up in that pod thing, I was a computer tech. I mean, I'm not that great of a hacker that I can take down a national defense grid or anything, but I certainly know my way around a network."

**Abel**: "Please tell me you're Catholic."

**Me**: "I'm Catholic."

**Abel**: "REALLY?"

**Me**: "No."

**Caterina**: "I hardly think that this is a laughing matter, Abel."

**Me**: "I'm not about to lie to a priest, let alone a cardinal."

**Caterina**: "Well, Professor, it appears that your little 'glitch' has possibly been a blessing in disguise..."

**Sister Kate**: "For ONCE."

**Caterina**: "Be that as it may... as YOU are the one who brought her here, Professor, I am holding you PERSONALLY responsible for her behavior while she's here."

**Sister Kate**: "Your Eminence, I hardly think that Father Wordsworth is capable of keeping an eye on this girl by himself!"

**Caterina**: "Quite right... which is why Father Nightroad will also be held responsible for her."

**Abel**: "WHAT?!"

**Father Leon**: "Oh, THIS should be good!"

**Gunslinger**: "Positive."

_To be continued_...


	3. Future Imperfect

_Note: My God, this little story of mine is popular! I'm glad so many of you are enjoying it! (What I get a huge kick out of is how many people love the Leon-Abel comedy team. I adore Leon as a character, and in the FUNimation dub, both Leon and Abel are voiced wonderfully, especially in their scenes together. For those of you who have not heard them, if you swing by my LiveJournal, there's a link on the lefthand side to a sampling of Trinity Blood quotes. Most of the AX members, as well as a few villains, are there.)_

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**Unexpected Results, Part III**

**Me**: "So, um... exactly what year is it?"

**Abel:** "What? Oh. The Year of Our Lord 3060."

**Me:** "Wow, you'd think the Vatican would have changed more in a thousand years."

**WWW**: "Oh, you've been to the Vatican before?"

**Me**: "Senior year of high school. Spent a month in Rome..."

**Abel**: "Wait, hang on a minute... a thousand years... you're from WHEN?"

**Me**: "2007."

**WWW**: "But... but that's absurd!"

**Me**: "Want to see my driver's license? Oh, no... wait... my wallet... oh, DAMN IT ALL TO-"

**Abel**: "Now, now, you're in a church, you know."

**Me**: "Excuse ME for not taking a vow of poverty! What am I supposed to do for money?"

**WWW**: "We won't let you starve, if that's what you mean."

**Me**: "Yeah, but all I have here is what I'm WEARING! Unless the Vatican has relaxed its strictures on how women dress or don't dress here-"

**Abel**: "Um, we'll find you something."

**Me**: "Thank you... you know, you're kinda cute when you blush."

**Abel**: "What?!"

**Me**: "Anyway, it was 2007 before I woke up here in that whatchamacallit."

**WWW**: "It's a vampire containment unit, actually, designed to hamper a vampire's biorhythms, such as they are, confining them to a less dangerous state of consciousness."

**Me**: "Did you say vampires?"

**WWW**: "Yes. Currently, the Vatican and the Empire in the East have an uneasy truce, but vampires do exist in this day and age."

**Me**: "Would it be too much to hope that you're talking about the 'avaunt thee, foul-fanged fiend', drive-them-off-with-a-cross kind of vampire?"

**Abel**: "If only it were that easy."

**Me**: "Oh, you have got to be fu-"

**Abel**: "Language..."

_To be continued_...


	4. You make ONE LITTLE MISTAKE

_Note: And the misadventures continue... you know, re-reading this... it's not bad, considering this is my first TRINITY BLOOD fic!_

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**Unexpected Results, Part IV **

**Sister Noelle:** "Ah, good afternoon, Abel, Professor. So, this is the result of the Professor's earlier mishap?"

**Me**: "Result? Excuse me-"

**Abel**: "How'd you find out so fast?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Father Leon couldn't wait to tell me all about it."

**Abel**: "Leon's here?"

**Father Leon**: "You didn't think I was going to miss _this_ one, did you?"

**Abel**: "Actually, it was more of a hope..."

**WWW**: "Now, now, Noelle, it wasn't so much of a mishap as it was a-"

**Sister Noelle**: "You do realize, Professor, that it took almost an hour to air out the hallways after the explosion."

**Father Leon**: "Not to mention setting off every smoke alarm in the office wing."

**WWW**: "Well, um..."

**Sister Noelle**: "And Sister Kate was saying something about you knocking out the _Iron Maiden_'s control systems?"

**WWW**: "Now _that_ is an exaggeration-"

**Sister Kate**: "WHAT was that?"

**WWW**: "GYAHHH!"

**Sister Noelle**: "Hello again, Sister Kate... another message from her Eminence?"

**Sister Kate**: "Yes... Lady Caterina would like you to join her in her office later on this afternoon."

**Father Leon**: "Yeah, I'll bet... when Brother Francesco gets wind of this, he's going to have a coronary."

**Sister Noelle**: "You're probably right..."

**Me**: "Do I even want to know?"

**Abel**: "No."

**Sister Noelle**: "But please tell her Eminence that I will be certain to stop by."

**Sister Kate**: "Hopefully, the _Iron Maiden_'s still in one piece when I get back..."

**WWW**: "Now, Sister Kate, I _really_ don't think that-"

**Sister Kate**: "We've already established that you don't _think_, William! Now _if_ you'll excuse me, I'm going to go make a backup of my information before the _Professor_ here drops the Iron Maiden out of the sky!"

**Father Leon**: "Wow, I haven't seen her that bent out of shape since that time that the Professor here disabled her audio projector."

**WWW**: "THAT was an accident."

**Father Leon**: "Sure it was..."

**Abel**: "Anyway, Sister Noelle, Lady Caterina would like this young woman to stay here for a couple of days while the Professor works on finding a way to send her back home."

**Sister Noelle**: "Of course. How do you do, miss, I'm Sister Noelle Bor."

**Me**: "You can call me Misha. Nice to meet you, Sister."

**Sister Noelle**: "I trust you're not too much the worse for wear after Father Wordsworth's little experiment went awry?"

**Me**: "Oh, apart from being yanked a millennium into the future, no money, no family, no friends, no way home, not to mention the vampire thing, I'm fantastic."

**Abel**: "Do I detect a hint of sarcasm?"

**Father Leon**: "Abel, that's a hint even _you_ couldn't miss."

**Abel**: "Noelle, are you all right? You look pale."

**WWW**: "Father Nightroad's right, you look like you've seen a ghost."

**Sister Noelle**: "I-I think you gentlemen had better come with me when I visit her Eminence, once I've gotten our visitor settled into her quarters."

**Me**: "So where is this place anyway?"

**Sister Noelle**: "This is the women's dormitory where the nuns reside."

**Me**: "Whoa, wait, hang on a minute. Do I look like a NUN to you?"

**Father Leon**: "That's all right, do I look like a priest?"

**Abel**: "No, you look like a fashion model... try closing your robes properly!"

**Father Leon**: "Shut up, four-eyes..."

**Sister Noelle**: "Gentlemen, _please_!"

**Me**: "And you honestly think I'm not going to stick out like a lump on plate glass in a dorm full of nuns?!"

**WWW**: "Well, once Sister Noelle provides you with appropriate attire, you'll blend in just fine."

**Me**: "Oh, no. No, no, no, no, _no_..."

**Father Leon**: "Actually, you'd probably look pretty cute in a habit."

**Me**: "BUT I'M NOT EVEN CATHOLIC!"

**Abel**: "Details, details..."

_To be continued_...


	5. But What Do We DO With Her?

_Note: It's almost ironic that what started out as a light-hearted joke has become somewhat serious. While I don't intend for this to be a total angst-fest by any stretch of the imagination, the ramifications of being pulled through time are a lot broader and more serious than I originally thought. So for a little bit, things might get a bit serious... then they'll probably end up going all-out weird..._

_... since you KNOW that Francesco and company are going to find out... eventually._

_As for when this is taking place, all of this is happening just after Episode 7 (Never Land). (Hence the reason for the absence of Sword Dancer. Esther will be making her apperance in the next chapter, most likely.)_

**

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**Unexpected Results, Part V**

**Caterina:** "Sister Noelle, thank you for... are you all right?"

**Sister Noelle**: "No... I'm not."

**Father Havel**: "Please, Noelle, sit down."

**Sister Kate**: "Would a cup of tea help?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Yes... yes, thank you, Kate."

**WWW**: "Your Eminence, Sister Noelle asked us to accompany her after we'd seen Misha to her quarters in the women's dormitory."

**Father Havel**: "Misha?"

**Abel**: "That's her name. She didn't volunteer a last one."

**Father Leon**: "Since the moment the two of them shook hands, Noelle's looked like she's been ready to faint at any minute."

**Caterina**: "Does this have anything to do with my earlier request that you probe her thoughts?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Yes."

**Father Leon**: "Hold on, you asked her to do what?"

**Abel**: "Your Eminence, with all due respect, that's a violation of Misha's privacy."

**Caterina**: "The woman gets pulled a thousand years into her own future because of a technical accident. As the leader of the AX, while it is in the Church's nature to believe in miracles, it is not in my nature to trust blindly."

**Abel**: "Isn't that what faith is?"

**Caterina**: "At any rate, now is not the time to discuss theology. Noelle?"

**Sister Noelle**: "I don't know how to describe this, but when I shook her hand, I saw... nothing like I'd ever seen before. It was as though she were a mirror... giving nothing of herself away, and only reflecting myself."

**Father Havel**: "But how can that be? She IS human, isn't she?"

**Father Tres**: "Positive. Anomalous visitor's bio-electrical signature correlates as human."

**Abel**: "Could that mental barrier be the result of her being pulled through time?"

**Sister Noelle**: "I don't know... but either it's that, or she's psychic herself."

**WWW**: "Most interesting... first we find out that she's a computer programmer, and now this. She's turning out to be quite an intriguing young woman."

**Father Leon**: "You think you could get that through that barrier of hers if you tried?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Almost certainly - I didn't want to push too hard at first, I wasn't sure how she'd react. She may also be in some shock herself, what with all of this going on."

**Caterina**: "William, I have to ask you. Are you going to be able to send her back to her own time?"

**WWW**: "In all truth, my lady... I don't know."

**Caterina**: "Then we'll have to keep her here. Heaven help us all if Francesco finds out about this..."

**Father Havel**: "He's already paranoid about Vatican security... if he learns that the Professor managed to materialize a woman in the middle of the Vatican-"

**Caterina**: "It'll be all the excuse he needs to shut down the AX. As it is, it took a great deal of fast talking to keep him from investigating Father Wordsworth's experiment further. Professor, for now, you are not to conduct any further testing on the containment unit."

**WWW**: "But I know that with just a little more work-"

**Caterina**: "This discussion is closed, Professor."

**WWW**: "Yes, my lady."

**Caterina:** "Father Tres, in the meantime, assign her an Enemy/Ally Identification signal, designation _Ally/Non-Combatant_, security access _Restricted_, then relay that information to the _Iron Maiden_."

**Father Tres:** "Positive. Assignment of E/AIS complete. Information now linked to control systems."

**Sister Noelle**: "But we owe it to her to find a way to get her home. You should have heard her, Eminence. On the surface, she laughs and gives nothing away, but underneath, she's just barely keeping control of herself. When it finally hits her what really happened... I'm afraid she'll break down completely. And worse... she has no one here."

**Abel**: "That's not true."

**Father Havel**: "What do you mean?"

**Abel**: "She has us."

_To be continued_...


	6. The AX's Newest Member

_Note: One other thing had dawned on me after writing the previous chapter. Being flung into the distant future, I could probably live with, even in the world of_ Trinity Blood _(vampires, Armageddon, the Inquisiton, and all that). But unlike quite a few people on here... well... there is a special consideration for me._

_And the game that I refer to later in the story is the role-playing game MUTANT CHRONICLES. For more on that particular alter ego of mine, swing by the SamuraikoProductions dot com website, and look up 'Christian Apollyon.'_

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**Unexpected Results, Part VI**

**Sister Esther**: "Oh! I'm sorry, I didn't realize anyone was in here!"

**Me**: "It's fine, don't worry about it."

**Sister Esther**: "Um, Sister? Are you... all right?"

**Me**: "I'll be fine... eventually."

**Sister Esther**: "So you're new to the AX too, huh?"

**Me**: "Excuse me?"

**Sister Esther**: "I'm Sister Esther Blanchett, recently arrived from St. Matthias in Ishtvan. I've only just been accepted into the Ministry of Holy Affairs. And you are...?"

**Abel**: "I'm sorry to interrupt, ladies, but if you could please excuse us for a moment, Esther?"

**Sister Esther**: "What? Oh, of course, Father. Please excuse me."

**Abel**: "How are your quarters? Do you need anything?"

**Me**: "A few books and things would be nice..."

**Abel**: "I'll see what I can do. How's the habit fit?"

**Me**: "Comfortable enough, but I feel like an idiot, not to mention a hypocrite. And do I really have to wear this over my hair?"

**Abel**: "I'm afraid so. But Leon was right... you actually do look rather charming as a nun."

**Me**: "The first pagan nun."

**Abel**: "I beg your pardon?"

**Me**: "Nothing."

**Abel**: "Anyway... Lady Caterina has asked me to create a new identity for you here, while the Professor works on a way of sending you back home."

**Me**: "_If_ he can do it."

**Abel**: "Now, don't look so downhearted. Have a little faith. Come on now, let me see you smile. That's better. Now... we'll need to give you a new name. Ever wanted to be called anything else?"

**Me**: "Anything?"

**Abel**: "Yes."

**Me**: "Johanna Sinclair."

**Abel**: "Pretty... why that?"

**Me**: "It sounds stupid, but in a game I used to play in, I played a Church enforcer whose cover name was Johanna Sinclair. It just seems... appropriate to use it now."

**Abel**: "Church enforcer?"

**Me**: "Long story."

**Abel**: "You'll have to tell me more about it sometime. So now, we'll just need to add your name to the AX records, plus some pertinent info... Age?"

**Me**: "31."

**Abel**: "Date of birth? No year, we'll correct that."

**Me**: "April 3rd."

**Abel**: "Height?"

**Me**: "5 foot 8."

**Abel**: "Weight?"

**Me**: "None of your business."

**Abel**: "Um, okay... hair colour, auburn... eye colour, hazel..."

**Me**: "You type even faster than I do..."

**Abel**: "Lots of practice, my dear. And... voila!"

**Me**: "And in a matter of keystrokes, Sister Johanna is born and I cease to exist."

**Abel**: "I beg your pardon?"

**Me**: "Oh, just ignore me. I'm just being existential."

**Abel**: "Actually, something I've been meaning to ask you... about your computer skills. Later on, if you'd be willing, I'd like to have you take a few tests on computer technology."

**Me**: "Sure... the Cardinal won't have a problem with me messing with your computers?"

**Abel**: "Your access will be limited, for now."

**Me**: "Fair enough."

**Abel**: "There... is one more thing."

**Me**: "Yes?"

**Abel**: "In all the confusion earlier, I didn't notice your ring earlier..."

**Me**: "Oh..."

**Abel**: "You're married, aren't you."

**Me**: "Yes."

**Abel**: "You... won't be able to wear that while you're here. I'm sorry."

**Me**: "Yeah, I guess a married nun would raise a few questions."

**Abel**: "I promise you, Misha... we'll find a way to get you home."

**Me**: "Thank you, Father. I guess it really is just a matter of... faith."

**Sister Noelle**: "There you two are. Father Havel, Father Leon, the Professor and I were about to have lunch, and we wanted to see if you'd like to join us."

**Abel**: "Of course! Misha- I mean, Sister Johanna?"

**Me**: "That is going to take some getting used to."

_To be continued_...


	7. Meet Sister Johanna

_Note: __To answer the questions that folks have sent to me..._

_No, that was_ not _disappointment in Abel's response after learning I'm married. I very much wrote that as Abel feeling sorry for me since given how far in the future I ended up, I was widowed unintentionally by the Professor's experiment.  
Yes, the statistics I gave Abel are the real ones. (Although I appear to have picked up my mother's habit of lying about my age... I'm 32, not 31.)  
Yes, in MY version of the TB universe, nuns do not wear wedding rings, despite being 'brides of Christ.'  
No, Sister Johanna is_ not _going to have some horrendously uber-spiffy ability. (Not unless that's provided via AX training, but I will not be starting off with it.)  
And to pre-emptively answer a question... I really_ am _a languages geek._

_And I just have to laugh at how many people absolutely_ adored _the whole 'first pagan nun' comment._

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**Unexpected Results, Part VII**

**Father Leon**: "Hey, Four-Eyes, where have you been? We were going to start without you..."

**Abel**: "Vaclav, Leon, Professor, allow me to introduce the AX's latest recruit, Sister Johanna Sinclair."

**WWW**: "Ah, a newcomer! How do you do, I'm William-"

**Father Havel**: "Um, William, unless I'm mistaken, that's the young woman your experiment conjured up."

**WWW**: "What?"

**Father Leon**: "Wow, I didn't even recognize you!"

**Me**: "I guess clothes really do 'maketh the man,' or woman in this case."

**Sister Noelle**: "Excellent... No one will question her presence now."

**Me**: "I still feel like a hypocrite."

**Father Havel**: "Hypocrite or not, it's still a necessity to keep the Inquisitorial Department from finding out about you."

**Me**: "The Inquisitorial Department? Hasn't religion moved past burning people at the stake yet?"

**Father Havel**: "They don't burn people at the stake-"

**Father Leon**: "No, they use charged plasma throwers to wipe out the infidels."

**Me**: "WHAT?!"

**Sister Noelle**: "Now, now, Father Leon, don't scare her."

**Father Leon**: "But still, do you think just dressing her in a habit is going to help?"

**Abel**: "She can attend services with us, and I'm certain that she's bright enough to learn quickly."

**Me**: "I should hope so."

**Father Leon**: "Yeah, but I mean, she has to have SOME religious knowledge or the whole thing will blow up in our faces."

**Abel**: "They let _you _into the priesthood, why shouldn't _she_ be able to pull it off?"

**Father Leon**: "What was that?!"

**Sister Noelle**: "Please, we are trying to eat here! Could we at least _pretend_ to keep this civilized?"

**Father Leon**: "Blame Father Four-Eyes, he's the one thatmmmph-"

**Abel**: "Would you give that a rest alreadmmph-"

**Me**: "I'm not taking my hands off your mouths until you both promise to knock it off. Okay?"

**Abel**: "Mm-hmm."

**Father Leon**: "Mm-hmm."

**Sister Noelle**: "If I'd known _that_ would have worked, I'd have done that years ago."

**Abel**: "Mis-, sorry, Johanna, do you have ANY religious background?"

**Me**: "I was raised Armenian Apostolic, if that helps... not unlike Greek Orthodox."

**Father Havel**: "That will help somewhat. But you're still going to need to learn the basics on Catholicism, or we'll never manage this. With her Eminence's permission, you'll begin classes immediately with me and with Father Nightroad."

**Me**: "Oh, great."

**WWW**: "Actually, I believe that I should be involved as well, since her Eminence has made me responsible for you, and I have been temporarily ordered not to conduct further experimentation on the containment unit."

**Abel**: "And it will be difficult, Johanna... you'll need to learn several languages at least passably well."

**Me**: "Such as?"

**Father Havel**: "Do you know Italian?"

**Me**: "Pozzo abbastanza." _Well enough_.

**WWW**: "Greek?"

**Me**: "Ochi para polu kakos." _Not too bad_.

**Abel**: "Latin?"

**Me**: "Pater noster, qui es in cælis, sanctificétur nomen tuum."

**Father Leon**: "Anything else?"

**Me**: "Havadamk ee mi Asdvadz, ee Hayrn amenagal, hararichn yergni yev yergri."

**Father Leon**: "What was THAT?"

**Me**: "Armenian..."

**WWW**: "What was it that you said?"

**Me**: "'We believe in one God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth...'"

**Father Havel**: "The Nicene Creed. Are you _sure_ you're not Catholic?"

**Me**: "I just have a gift for languages. I'm awful at mathematics, if it helps."

**Sister Noelle**: "You said you were _raised_ Apostolic... but what faith do you follow _now_?"

**Me**: "Um..."

**Abel**: "Wait, don't tell me you were _serious_ about that 'first pagan nun' crack back in your quarters!"

**Me**: "Actually, I was."

**Sister Noelle**: "God help us all."

_To be continued_...


	8. The Vatican Network

_Note: I feel like an idiot, because it wasn't until tonight that I realized that after my last update of my website in the middle of January, I screwed up my site navigation, which meant I'd told a whole bunch of folks to hit the SAMURAIKO PRODUCTIONS site without making sure the actual page with Christian's profile could be reached. My bad._

_On the bright side, if you visit the site, not only is the navigation fixed, but there are two new TRINITY BLOOD videos for all you fans! (Short but quality work.)_

_Now we get to see Sister Johanna's l337 skillz... (and yes, I can do all of this. And no, I won't tell you how.)_

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**Unexpected Results, Part VIII**

**WWW**: "Now, Sister, if you'll just have a seat..."

**Me**: "Ah, test time."

**Abel**: "That's right... it's not really so much of a test as it is to help you get familiar with our system."

**Me**: "Fine by me."

**Father Havel**: "Just so you understand, Johanna, the Vatican's computer network may very well be a good deal different than what you are used to."

**Me**: "I know... but I can't just stay here bored out of my mind for however long it takes Father Wordsworth to get that thingamajig of his fixed. Boredom is just anathema to me."

**WWW**: "Is that so?"

**Me**: "Let me put it this way... if there's a hell, and I go there, it won't be fire and brimstone for eternity - it'll be boredom."

**Abel**: "And... there we are. Do you mind if we sit and watch you?"

**Me**: "Nope, not at all. Let's see... Special Operations Division... Department of Foreign Affairs... Ministry of Holy Affairs... Vatican Network... So far, so good."

**Abel**: "You're right, you do type quickly!"

**Me**: "Told you. But you're still faster than I am."

**Father Havel**: "What are you doing?"

**Me**: "Rule number one - work backward in any system. That way you can see everything else on the network. Ah, okay, so that's the AX part of the Vatican network... that's probably the Inquisition's stuff... corporate... diplomatic division..."

**Abel**: "Wha... how are you finding all of that?"

**Me**: "Helps to know where not to go. I can at least find them on the network, I just can't get into them... yet."

**Father Havel**: "Are you saying you could hack into the Inquisition's computers?"

**Me**: "Given enough time, maybe so. There is no such thing as an absolutely secure system."

**Abel**: "Um, do I even want to know how you're doing this?"

**Me**: "Probably not."

**Abel**: "I didn't think so."

**WWW**: "You're learning this remarkably quickly."

**Me**: "Computer systems are fairly straightforward, once you know your way around. Anything in particular you want me to do?"

**Abel**: "Yes, I'd like you to hack into the AX network. Something outside of your allowed access."

**Me**: "I'm not going to be setting off alarms and having armed guards come running in, am I?"

**Father Havel**: "That all depends on whether you get caught."

**Me**: "Great."

**WWW**: "Well, at the very least, I'd say that she's proving to be pretty adept, if they haven't caught her by now."

**Me**: "Hey, Father Nightroad, how high's your security access?"

**Abel**: "Mine? Well, actually rather good."

**Me**: "Better than mine?"

**Abel**: "Yes."

**Me:** "What about you two?"

**Father Havel**: "Probably about the same as Father Abel's, to be honest."

**WWW**: "So what do you plan to do now?"

**Me**: "Get creative."

**Abel**: "Why do I not like the smile on your face when you say that?"

**Me**: "Boy, do I miss having access to my own computer - I don't have half the scripts I need for this memorized, but... let's see if this works."

**Father Havel**: "What's that for?"

**Me**: "She shoots... SHE SCORES! Nice to see that some things haven't changed this far in the future... they still show the entire user directory of a network. Decisions, decisions... which AX member's account should I try?"

**WWW**: "Try what?"

**Me**: "Eenie, meenie, minie, mo..."

**Abel**: "Wait a minute, you're not going to borrow-"

**Me**: "Catch the AX by the toe..."

**Father Havel**: "Please tell me that I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing."

**Me**: "If they freak out, let them go..."

**Abel**: "Oh, my God..."

**Me**: "Eenie, meenie, minie... oops."

**WWW**: "'Oops' is not normally how that rhyme ends..."

**Father Havel**: "I know..."

**Abel**: "Oh, good God..."

**Me**: "Okay, new plan..."

**Father Havel**: "And what's that?"

**Me**: "Lie through our teeth when the guards get here."

**Abel**: "WHAT?!"

_To be continued_...


	9. Talk Your Way out of THIS One!

_Note: You people are sadists... everyone is dying to see Johanna (and the rest of the AX gang) get into trouble, ranging from having Petros show up to find out what happened, to having FRANCESCO show up to find out what happened._

_But that's okay... because I'm a sadist, too, I suppose. Hence this chapter._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part IX**

**Father Havel**: "Johanna, please tell me you were joking that the guards are going to be arriving soon."

**Guard**: "All of you, hands in the air and don't move!"

**Abel**: "I guess not."

**WWW**: "Now, gentlemen, let's be reasonable about this."

**Guard**: "Quiet! Now, which one of you tried to break into the Vatican's computer?"

**Father Havel**: "No one tried to 'break in,' as you so crudely put it."

**Guard**: "Don't bother lying, we saw an unauthorized user on the system and traced it to this location!"

**Me**: "Oh, not _again_!"

**WWW**: "Sister Johanna?"

**Me**: "Father Abel, I can't believe you forgot!"

**Abel**: "ME?!"

**Me**: "I'm _so_ sorry, I just joined the AX, and this is the second time that Father Nightroad was supposed to arrange for me to have security access on the computer system. Honestly, Father Nightroad, this is embarrassing!"

**Abel**: "But I-"

**Guard: **"So you _were_ trying to break into the Vatican network?"

**Me**: "Do I _look_ like some sort of malicious, unscrupulous computer hacker?!"

**Guard**: "I'm sorry, Sister, I meant no offense-"

**Me:** "The Fathers were helping me get a better idea of how the Vatican was organized, so I showed them how to find the user directory of the Vatican so they could tell me who was who. After all, there's nothing so humiliating as meeting a high-ranking official and having no idea who he or she is!"

**Guard**: "So you're saying that-"

**Me**: "Besides, how can it possibly be construed as breaking in when someone with no access can see it?"

**Guard**: "Well-"

**Me**: "To be honest, I was surprised I got that far. Small wonder that her Eminence wants me to work on updating computer security for the AX, if it took you that long to stop me..."

**WWW**: "That's not strictly accurate-"

**Me**: "You're right, Father Wordsworth, I wasn't implying that _I_ would be the one making the changes, that's Security's job, of course. But someone has to be able to tell them what needs to be done!"

**Guard**: "I'm surprised that her Eminence didn't say something to us sooner."

**Me**: "If Father Nightroad was _supposed_ to be the one telling you?"

**Guard**: "Good point."

**Me**: "It was bad enough that when I first arrived here, Father Nightroad was supposed to have updated my records with the Vatican to be listed as authorized personnel. But first there was the problem with not being issued an ID card, and now this!"

**Guard**: "Well, I should have known that Father Nightroad was behind this one."

**Abel**: "What's THAT supposed to mean?!"

**Me**: "Well, honestly, it wasn't all Father Nightroad's fault."

**Abel**: "Thank you, Sister."

**Me**: "It's partially Father Wordsworth's responsibility, too."

**WWW**: "ME?! How is any of this my fault?"

**Guard**: "When is something technologically going wrong around here NOT your fault?"

**WWW**: "Well, I-"

**Me:** "Anyway, I'm sorry to have caused any trouble. Father Havel was only trying to explain to me the Vatican hierarchy, and I'm sure he NEVER would have been training me using the computer system if he'd KNOWN that Father Nightroad and Father Wordsworth hadn't already made the necessary arrangements."

**Guard**: "I see..."

**Me**: "Actually, to keep something like this happening again, do you mind if I just come down to Security so we can get all of this straightened out at the proper level?"

**Guard**: "An excellent suggestion, Sister."

**Abel**: "Now hang on a min-"

**Me**: "I hope, Father Nightroad, that you DID manage to get my personnel files FINALLY taken care of? I'd hate to inconvenience Security even more than I already have."

**Abel**: "O-of course, Sister. Cardinal Caterina oversaw it personally."

**Me**: "This is just so embarrassing..."

**Guard**: "It's all right, it's not the first time that Father Nightroad and Father Wordsworth have had a run-in with security."

**WWW**: "Now, really, isn't that-"

**Guard**: "You should have seen the security system after his bio-electric detection apparatus went haywire. We were replacing circuits for a week."

**Me**: "And um, do you mind escorting me down to Security? I'm still trying to find my way around here, this place is just huge."

**Guard**: "Of course, Sister. Once you're done, if you'd like, I'll bring you back here. That is, if you gentlemen don't mind waiting..."

**Me**: "Will it take long? I'm supposed to be submitting a report to her Eminence later today, and this is just so going to mess up my schedule."

**Guard**: "Not at all, Sister. We'll have everything taken care in less than an hour."

**Me**: "Thank you so much. Shall we? Oh... do you mind if either Father Nightroad or Father Wordsworth comes with me? Her Eminence did say that I was supposed to be escorted at all times by one of these two."

**Guard**: "Certainly..."

**Abel**: "Y-yes, of course. Professor... Father Havel... if you'll excuse me. Us."

**Me**: "This is just _so_ embarrassing..."

_To be continued..._


	10. Out of the Frying Pan

_Note: Here I am being a bit more 'liberal' about my fast-talking ability... some of it is fairly outrageous, but as for the rest... well, as the quote goes, "There is no lie so effective as an artfully told truth."_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part X**

**Abel**: "Johanna, you realize that you've just jumped headfirst into a world of trouble. Where exactly are you FROM?"

**Me**: "Currently, Phoenix. Before that, New York."

**Abel**: "But the United States doesn't exist anymore!"

**Me**: "WHAT?!"

**Guard**: "Is something wrong?"

**Me**: "Oh, n-no, just hearing from Father Abel about Father Wordsworth's bio-electric whatsit that'd you mentioned. Didn't realize he'd knocked out the _Iron Maiden_'s radar with it..."

**Abel**: "What are we going to do? Security is going to have to know where you're from, and they _will_ make inquiries."

**Me**: "Can't I just be a travelling nun? Go wherever I'm needed?"

**Abel**: "But you still have to be from _somewhere_!"

**Me**: "Too late, we're here..."

**Guard**: "Now, Sister, if you'll please have a seat over here."

**Security tech**: "Full name?"

**Abel**: "Here we go..."

**Me**: "Johanna Sorina Sinclair."

**Security tech**: "Sorina? That sounds Russian."

**Me**: "It is. My mother's family comes from all over Eastern Europe."

**Security tech**: "Date of birth?"

**Me**: "April 3rd, 3328."

**Security tech**: "Place of birth?"

**Me**: "On a dig in what used to be Jordan."

**Security tech**: "A dig?"

**Me**: "Both my parents were scholars, archaelogists, completely bent on learning about the past. Not just pre-Armageddon, I mean _ancient_ stuff. And giving birth on a dig was NOT an incident my mother ever cared to repeat, she said."

**Security tech**: "Where were you raised?"

**Me**: "Londinium, primarily. Spent some time in the Franc Kingdom, some time in Alta, then visiting Byzantium... It's fascinating there, have you ever seen it?"

**Security tech**: "N-no, I can't say that I have."

**Me**: "The authorities in the Empire probably have a copy of my birth records."

**Guard**: "Unfortunately, they're not often too cooperative with the Vatican over there."

**Me**: "Politics never were my strong point."

**Security tech**: "And your family has no ties to the Empire?"

**Me**: "As in whether or not my family comes from that region, or whether or not my family are vampire sympathizers?"

**Security tech**: "Um, the latter."

**Me**: "No."

**Security tech**: "You're certain?"

**Me**: "Well, I don't speak to my family. They disagree with how I pursued my religious beliefs. And I just got so tired of fighting with them over it, I hate how small-minded and rigid some people can be."

**Security tech**: "Now, I see that Father Nightroad entered your information in the AX network."

**Abel**: "Per orders from Cardinal Sforza."

**Security tech**: "Her specific duties, so we can define proper access?"

**Abel**: "Cardinal Caterina has concerns about the AX computer systems' security, what with the recent demonstration by the Fleurs du Mal hijacking the _Tristan_. Sister Johanna is to collaborate with myself and Father Wordsworth in assessing the AX security systems, then submitting the results of her findings to the Cardinal."

**Security tech**: "Well, we can certainly provide her with top access to the AX branch of the network, but the other departments will be off-limits, Sister. I apologize."

**Me**: "Why? Isn't the primary goal the overall security of the Vatican network?"

**Guard**: "Well..."

**Me**: "I'll tell you what. Once I get done with my findings, and her Eminence has had a chance to review them, she can arrange a meeting with the other departments to see how many of these steps can be implemented across the other systems."

**Security tech**: "That might be more acceptable."

**Me**: "And I'm sure with what I provide, they'll be able to plug up any other security leaks on their own."

**Guard**: "Security leaks?"

**Me**: "They're inevitable. There's always ONE person who thinks the rules don't apply to him or her, or that ONE quick work-around is okay when you're on a tight schedule... it's not always _meant_ to be a security risk, but..."

**Guard**: "I see..."

**Me**: "Just to be on the safe side, would you mind giving me the names of a few other people who do the same thing I do in the other departments? They might know a few tips and tricks for isolating the AX systems from the rest of the Vatican network."

**Guard**: "I'll have to speak with the other departments, but I don't foresee that being a problem."

**Security tech**: "Now, let's get your ID card taken care of... first we'll need a photograph... if you'll just step over here."

**Me**: "Oh, I always look _awful_ in photos..."

**Abel**: "Trust me, Johanna, _everyone_ looks awful in these."

**Security tech**: "Head up... eyes right here... good."

**Abel**: "Actually, yours came out nicely. My glasses always catch the glare."

**Security tech**: "And we'll need to take your fingerprints and a retinal scan."

**Me**: "Will it hurt?"

**Abel**: "Taking fingerprints is hardly a painful experience."

**Me**: "I _meant_ the retinal scan, Father Nightroad..."

**Abel**: "Oh... no. You'll barely feel it."

**Security tech**: "Left hand... good... then right hand... Now if you'll place your forehead against this, don't blink... there."

**Me**: "I'm sorry to have to disrupt things by coming down here like this."

**Guard**: "Don't worry, we're grateful that you've been so cooperative."

**Security tech**: "Oh, and Sister? One more thing for our records..."

**Me**: "Yes?"

**Security tech**: "Where did you take your vows?"

**Abel**: "Oh, no..."

**Me**: "Santa Cecilia in Trastevere. Ci saranno niente altro?" _Will there be anything else?_

**Security tech**: "N-no, thank you."

**Me**: "Siete benvenuti." _You're welcome_. "Father Nightroad?"

**Abel**: "W-w-what? Oh, yes, of course, Sister. We should go."

_To be continued_...


	11. And Into the Lion's Den

_Note: One little misconception I want to clear up right now... I am not nearly as good of a liar as everyone thinks I am. In gaming terms, I have the Disadvantage "Can't Lie." (This doesn't mean I'm physically incapable of lying... it just means that everyone KNOWS I'm lying.) But I do blather very well, and I can think fast on my feet. But eventually, someone WILL figure it out... and then I'm screwed._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XI**

**Abel**: "My God, Johanna... I never thought you were going to get away with that!"

**Me**: "To be honest, neither did I. But the trick was keeping them off balance. When they expect you to retreat, attack. When they expect you to lie, tell the truth. And when they ask why they should trust you, tell them why they shouldn't."

**Abel**: "I'm not sure I follow."

**Me**: "Don't worry about it."

**Abel**: "But where did you pick up all that information?"

**Me**: "While I was on the AX network."

**Abel**: "Wha- but how? You were only on the computers for maybe a total of thirty minutes before Security showed up!"

**Me**: "I'm a fast reader. Pair that up with the fact that the Security office had a half-dozen maps up on the walls with the locations of current travelling priests affiliated with the Vatican, and voila! Besides..."

**Abel**: "Besides what?"

**Me**: "I'm not the _only_ one around here who's good at acting one way while really being something else... am I?"

**Abel**: "How... did you know?"

**Me**: "It sounds crazy, but whether you're laughing or panicking or anything, your eyes always look... shadowed."

**Abel**: "The Professor was right about you, Johanna... you _are_ an intriguing young woman."

**Me**: "Thank you, I think."

**WWW**: "Father Nightroad! Sister Johanna! How... did everything go all right?"

**Abel**: "All right? It went brilliantly!"

**Father Havel**: "Really?"

**Abel**: "You should have seen it... she had Security eating out of her hands!"

**Me**: "That's not strictly true, Father..."

**WWW**: "I'm impressed."

**Abel**: "Until now, I thought only Leon could lie with that straight a face, but-"

**Me**: "Excuse me?"

**Abel**: "Oh... Johanna, please don't tell him I said that."

**Me**: "All right, but you owe me."

**Abel**: "I'm not sure I like the sound of that..."

**Father Havel**: "At least we don't have to worry about Security looking too closely at her anymore."

**Me**: "For now... if they really do start making inquiries, though, I'm screwed."

**Abel**: "Language, Sist- OW!"

**Father Havel**: "We'd best hurry though, or we'll be late for evening services."

**WWW**: "Johanna, you'll be coming with us. Her Eminence would like for you to attend at least two of each service to be certain you know exactly what goes on."

**Me**: "Great... my hypocrisy knows no bounds."

**Abel**: "Why?"

**Me**: "Come on, Father Abel. It was bad enough that I have to dress as a nun. But to have to attend Catholic services?"

**WWW**: "Haven't you attended services before?"

**Me**: "Very, _very_ rarely in the last several years. But like I said before, it's... it's not me."

**Abel**: "So _that's_ what you meant, back in Security, about your parents disapproving of the way that you worship."

**Me**: "Yes."

**Abel**: "If... if it's that big of a problem for you, I'll speak to her Eminence about it."

**Me**: "No, please don't. I mean, after all that she's done for me... I can't not go. Just... when we're done... is it safe for me to walk around Rome at night?"

**WWW**: "It will be if one of us is with you."

**Me**: "Oh, no, I could never impose. I'll be fine on my own."

**Abel**: "I'll come with you."

**Me**: "Father, I just said that-"

**Abel**: "Please."

**Me**: "F-fine... thank you, Father."

**WWW**: "Excellent, we've made it just in time."

**Father Havel**: "Generally, the departments tend to sit in groups, so it won't look strange to have you with us. Also, Sister Noelle and Sister Esther should be arriving momentarily."

**Me**: "What about Cardinal Caterina?"

**Abel**: "She'll be with his Holiness."

**Me**: "Why do I get the feeling there's more to this than meets the eye?"

**Father Havel**: "You do catch on quick... here, before we go inside... this is for you."

**Me**: "What's this?"

**Father Havel**: "A radio communicator, like the ones that all AX members wear."

**WWW**: "Normally, these are shut off during a service... however, thanks to some technical wizardry from myself and Sister Kate, yours, Father Abel's, and Sister Noelle's will be on during the service. Over the course of the mass, one of those two will occasionally and discreetly point someone out to you. Sister Kate will relay to you via radio who exactly the individual is."

**Me**: "Are you sure we won't get caught?"

**Abel**: "It should be fine... given that both Cardinal Caterina and Cardinal Francesco remain in contact with their operatives at all times, even during mass."

**Me**: "I see..."

**Abel**: "You see, after Sister Esther had a rather embarrassing incident when _she_ first arrived, her Eminence wants to make certain you don't make the same mistake."

**Me**: "What'd she do? That is, if it's okay that I ask?"

**Father Havel**: "She was dragging around the Pope."

**Me**: "WHAT?!"

**WWW**: "It's a long story..."

_To be continued_...


	12. Evening Services

_Note: This chapter might offend the more devout Catholics, as I am doing this MY way - one, to speed up the service, and two, to spread out who is doing the talking. I'm well aware that there is generally one priest leading the service, but it's easy to imagine that Francesco shoe-horned his way into the service given that Alessandro's something of a wuss, and Caterina got in on it to balance Francesco... trinity, indeed. _

_Anyway. Deal with it._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XII**

**Me**: "My God, this place is HUGE!"

**Abel**: "Well, this _is_ the Vatican."

**Me**: "I know, but I'd forgotten just how _big_ this place is!"

**Sister Noelle**: "Here, Sister, sit between me and Father Abel. Now, as the Professor explained to you outside, the two of us will be pointing out certain important figures while signalling to Sister Kate. She'll relay the information to you over your communicator."

**Me**: "Strange, I thought there'd be more people here..."

**Father Leon**: "They'll be arriving shortly."

**Me**: "Oh, heya, Father Leon."

**Father Leon**: "I heard that Four-Eyes got you into trouble already?"

**Abel**: "Would you give it a _rest_ already?!"

**Sister Esther**: "Father Abel, what have you done _now_?"

**Me**: "It's nothing, Sister... just a slight oversight by Father Nightroad and Father Wordsworth, but everything's okay. And I apologize for not introducing myself earlier... Sister Johanna Sinclair."

**Caterina**: "Ah, Sister Johanna... I've heard that your first day has been a rather eventful one."

**Me**: "Diplomatic choice of words, your Eminence."

**Caterina**: "Are you ready for this evening's service?"

**Me**: "Ready as I'll ever be."

**Caterina**: "Have faith, everything will be fine."

**Me**: "Faith is all I have _left_ at this point, your Eminence."

**Caterina**: "Father Abel, Sister Noelle, I leave her in your care for the evening."

**Sister Noelle**: "Yes, your Eminence."

**Me**: "Time for Catholic aerobics..."

**Abel**: "What?"

**Me**: "You know... stand, sit, kneel, sit, kneel, stand, sit, stand, kneel, and so on."

**Abel**: "Cute."

**Brother Francesco**: "Let the evening service begin!"

**Me**: "Here we go..."

**Pope Alessandro**: "In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit..."

**All**: "Amen."

**Sister Kate**: "_Good enough place to start. That, in case you didn't know, is his Holiness, Pope Alessandro the Eighteenth. And I don't have to be there to imagine the look on your face_."

**Me**: "But... he's so young! He's cute, too."

**Sister Kate**: "_Unfortunately, he tends to be somewhat overwhelmed by_-"

**Brother Francesco**: "Lord, we have sinned against you; Lord, have mercy."

**All**: "Lord, have mercy."

**Sister Kate**: "_Cardinal Francesco de Medici, Duke of Tuscany... half brother to Sister Caterina and his Holiness. Head of the Inquisition, and _not _someone whose bad side you want to get on_."

**Me**: "He gives me the _creeps_."

**Caterina**: "Glory to God in the Highest, and peace to His people on Earth..."

**Sister Kate**: "_And of course, you already know Cardinal Caterina_."

**Me**: "So she's actually related to both the Pope and Francesco?"

**Sister Kate**: "_That's right... but they're hardly what you call a stable family unit_."

**Me**: "I can imagine."

**Pope Alessandro**: "Almighty God, to you all hearts are open, all desires known and from you no secrets are hid."

**Me**: "That's for sure... especially with the Inquisitorial Department at your back."

**Sister Kate**: "_Speaking of which... Brother Petros and Sister Paula. Not related. The first and second in command of the Inquisitorial Department... otherwise known as the Knight of Annihilation and the Lady of Death. Absolutely loyal to God, the Pope, the Church, and Brother Francesco, _and _in that order, I might add_."

**Alessandro**: "Go now, in peace..."

**All**: "Thanks be to God."

**Abel**: "There now, that wasn't so difficult, was it?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Johanna, are you all right? Johanna?"

**Me**: "Please excuse me a minute."

**WWW**: "Of course..."

**Father Havel**: "She seemed to handle the whole thing well... of course, I'm not certain about her taking communion at the next Sunday Mass, but at least she didn't draw too much attention."

**Abel**: "Good thing, too... I had no idea that Petros and Paula were going to be here tonight. I gather they just got back from their latest assignment."

**Father Leon**: "They probably heard the criminal was back and came to check up on me."

**Sister Noelle**: "If that were the case, you'd be in a dungeon right now, Leon."

**Father Leon**: "Good point."

**Father Havel**: "Where did Johanna go?"

**Abel**: "Um, the restroom, I think."

**Sister Noelle**: "I think I had better check on her... she seemed upset by something. I'll be right back."

**WWW**: "I'm sure she's just tired, it has been a rather trying day for her..."

**Father Leon**: "Yeah, it feels weird, doesn't it? Seems like she's been here a lot longer..."

**Father Havel**: "She does have that kind of personality... like you've known her forever."

**Sister Noelle**: "Abel!"

**Abel**: "Noelle, what's wrong?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Sister Johanna... she's gone!"

**Father Leon**: "What?!"

**Sister Esther**: "Could she have gone back to the dormitory?"

**Sister Kate**: "_She doesn't appear to have used her ID card to get back in_."

**Abel**: "Damn it, she said that she wouldn't leave the grounds of the Vatican alone."

**Father Leon**: "You mean she's out wandering by herself at this time of night?!"

**WWW**: "I'll head north from here... Father Leon, head east, Father Havel, head west. Sister Kate, please relay to Father Tres to search south of the Vatican for Sister Johanna. We'll stay in contact via the _Iron Maiden_."

**Sister Esther**: "Good luck, Fathers..."

**Abel**: "I wonder..."

**Sister Noelle:** "What is it?"

**Abel**: "Where is Trastevere?"

_To be continued_...


	13. Priests, Nuns, Friends and Allies

_Note: I was wondering just how many chapters it would take before Johanna's mind finally wraps itself around the enormity of it all... but don't get all snarky on me or anything._

_And where Tres finds Johanna is a real place, and the site of one of the true religious experiences I've ever had in my life. But that's another story..._

_(BTW, there's a poll up for this in my LiveJournal and on the TrinityBlood LiveJournal community.)_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XIII**

**Father Tres**: "Sister Johanna Sinclair..."

**Me**: "Who's there?! Oh... Father Tres."

**Father Tres**: "What are you doing here?"

**Me**: "I..."

**Father Tres**: "Did you leave the Vatican grounds covertly?"

**Me**: "That's a fancy way of accusing me of sneaking out..."

**Father Tres**: "Why?"

**Me**: "Why what?"

**Father Tres**: "Why did you leave the Vatican grounds unescorted and at night?"

**Me**: "I just needed to get out for a little while. I'd already spoken to Father Nightroad about it, before services."

**Father Tres**: "Father Nightroad has already informed you that it is too dangerous by night, so I will accompany you."

**Me**: "No, please, that's not necessary."

**Father Tres:** "Gunslinger to _Iron Maiden_."

**Sister Kate: **"_Iron Maiden_ here, Father Tres. Did you locate Anomaly?"

**Father Tres:** "Positive. Sister Johanna Sinclair is currently at the S. Nicola di Bari, near the Basilica of St. Sebastian, Via Appia Antica, approximately 5.5 miles southeast of the Vatican."

**Me: **"'Anomaly'?"

**Sister Kate:** "Confirmed. Father Nightroad is already on his way there, and should be arriving momentarily. I've just notified Father Havel, Father Leon, and the Professor to return to the Vatican. Also, Father Nightroad requests that you please remain with Sister Johanna until he arrives. Kate out."

**Me**: "No, please. I just... I just want to be alone for a while. Well, that's not quite true, I wish that I... no. Never mind. Being out and about on my own is the next best thing."

**Father Tres**: "Either you will walk with me, or we will wait for Father Nightroad. Otherwise, upon return, you are to be confined to the grounds of the Vatican."

**Me**: "Fine..."

**Father Tres**: "Do you object to me accompanying you?"

**Me**: "No, no, no, it's nothing against you! I just want some time to myself, and I can't have it if everyone is always around. Don't you ever get like that?"

**Father Tres**: "Negative."

**Me**: "You don't? Lucky you."

**Father Tres**: "Luck is not a factor; it is not possible for an android to feel anything."

**Me**: "You... wait, whoa, hold on a second... you're an... an ANDROID?"

**Father Tres**: "Positive."

**Me**: "Get out..."

**Father Tres**: "Unable to comply. We are both already out of doors."

**Me**: "But you... you look _so_... I mean, other than the personality and speech, I would have _sworn_ that... wow."

**Father Tres**: "What are you doing?"

**Me**: "I'm sorry, I was just wondering what your skin felt like. I didn't mean... I didn't mean to paw you like that. I apologize."

**Father Tres**: "It is all right."

**Me**: "Um, Father Tres?"

**Father Tres**: "What is it?"

**Me**: "Why did you become a priest?"

**Father Tres**: "I exist to serve her Eminence, Cardinal Caterina Sforza, and his Holiness, Pope Alessandro. That is my sole duty."

**Me**: "I see."

**Abel**: "Johanna... thank heaven you're all right. Thank you for waiting with her, Tres."

**Father Tres**: "No thanks are required. Good night, Father Nightroad. Good night, Sister Johanna Sinclair."

**Me**: "Good night, Father Tres."

**Abel**: "Johanna..."

**Me**: "Please, Father, I don't want a lecture right now, I just thought I was going to go insane, all right? Is wanting just a little time to myself a sin?"

**Abel**: "No, but you vanished out from under our noses, causing everyone a great deal of worry."

**Me**: "I'm sorry..."

**Abel**: "So... why did you come all the way out here?"

**Me**: "When I get like this, I just want to walk... feel the wind and the moonlight, you know? It helps me relax, helps me think... or _not_ think."

**Abel**: "Yes... I understand. Rome is beautiful by night..."

**Me**: "I've always loved these ruins... by day they're lovely, but by night... they're timeless. Eternal..."

**Abel**: "You've been here before?"

**Me**: "Oh, yes, a long, long time ago. I remember when my brother and I were... were..."

**Abel**: "Are you all right, Sister?"

**Me**: "I... no."

**Abel**: "Would you like to talk about it?"

**Me**: "Confessing my woes to a priest... _there's_ a first."

**Abel**: "How about... confiding your troubles in a friend?"

**Me**: "Are we friends?"

**Abe**l: "I'd like to think so."

**Me**: "Why?"

**Abel**: "Because... _your_ eyes are the ones that are shadowed now. What did you see?"

**Me**: "That about two hundred and fifty years from the last thing I remember... _everything_ I know... _everyone_ I know... will cease to exist."

**Abel**: "Oh..."

**Me**: "I saw it in the computer network... How many lives... h-how many hopes and d-dreams went into the darkness, Father? H-how could the world be so m-messed up, to d-_destroy_ itself? Oh, God, _w-why_?"

**Abel**: "Oh, Johanna..."

**Me**: "And I-I just feel so... _alone_ h-here. _Unwanted_. A b-burden that no one knows what to do with.

**Abel**: "Johanna, that's _not_ true-"

**Me**: "And I... I d-don't have anyone to talk to, anyone w-who understands... and I m-miss... my h-husband... so... damned... much..."

**Abel**: "It's all right, you're not alone... not while I'm around."

**Me**: "Father Abel?"

**Abel**: "Yes?"

**Me**: "C-can I ask a r-really important question?"

**Abel**: "Anything."

**Me**: "Are priests allowed to hug nuns?"

**Abel**: "Not exactly... but I am allowed to hold a friend."

**Me**: "Even if she's a c-crying, messed-up, t-troublemaking, hypocritical pagan nun?"

**Abel**: "Johanna..."

**Me**: "W-what?"

**Abel**: "Come here."

_To be continued_...


	14. Tea, Sympathy, and AX Training

_Note: Back to weirdness again... by the way, there is a poll now up on my LiveJournal (entry date March 3rd, 2007), about how this story should progress. I know a lot of you enjoy this little tale of mine, and it's only four questions, so please swing by and let me know what you want to see!_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XIV**

**Sister Esther**: "Oh, Father Nightroad, thank goodness you found her!"

**Abel**: "Actually, it was Father Tres who found her, I just escorted her back."

**Father Havel**: "You gave all of us quite a scare, you know... one minute you were there, and the next..."

**Me**: "I know, Father, and I'm sorry, really I am. I just... had to get away for a little bit."

**Father Leon**: "Hey, were you _crying_?!"

**Abel**: "Tactful as always, Leon."

**Me**: "Yeah, I was. Got a problem with that?"

**Father Leon**: "Well, no, but... you seem so... you know, tough. In control. Unflappable, like her Eminence."

**Me**: "I appreciate the compliment, but I'm just a normal, screwed-up human being."

**Sister Noelle**: "Well, Sister Kate has sent some hot tea for you, so why not come back to the dormitory and have a cup?"

**Abel**: "Kate sent tea? Oh, how _divine_!"

**Sister Noelle**: "It's not for you, Abel... I still remember the look on her face the last time she saw you dump in... what was it? Thirteen spoonfuls of sugar?"

**Me**: "Oh, ugh! That's _disgusting_!"

**Abel**: "Now, now, don't knock it til you've tried it."

**Me**: "God, I don't even want to _think_ how hyper I'd be after drinking that, they'd be peeling me off the ceiling!"

**Sister Esther**: "You really should have some, Sister Johanna, Sister Kate's tea is absolutely wonderful!"

**Me**: "Um... well... not to offend Sister Kate, but I have this weird thing about tea."

**Sister Noelle**: "What do you mean?"

**Me**: "I can't taste it."

**Abel**: "Really? That's bizarre... is it all teas or just a particular type?"

**Me**: "All types. No matter how strong it's brewed. I can smell it across the room, but it just tastes like hot water."

**WWW**: "That's a new one. I wonder why."

**Me**: "No idea. But, Sister Kate?"

**Sister Kate**: "Yes?"

**Me**: "Thank you very much for thinking of me."

**Sister Kate**: "Would hot chocolate work better?"

**Me**: "Yes, thanks so much!"

**Father Leon**: "So, what had you so upset before that you just took off like that?"

**Me**: "Sometimes I just... just get antisocial. Like I can't bear to have anyone around. And everything just... kind of hit me all at once."

**Father Leon**: "Too bad you had only Father Four-Eyes' shoulder to cry on."

**Abel**: "Would you rather she sobbed all over _you_?"

**Father Leon**: "Well, it's not like _you're_ a shining example of masculine strength..."

**Abel**: "Oh, that's good, coming from someone who usually shows all the sympathy of a rock."

**Me**: "Actually, Father Abel was very kind about the whole thing... as have all of you."

**WWW**: "We understand, Johanna. We know that since you got here this morning, we've been pushing you very hard. It's only natural that when everything finally caught up to you, it would be a little... overwhelming."

**Me**: "Oh, that normally wouldn't bother me. I'm used to doing four hundred things at once, it was just the... the realization of losing everything that hit me so hard. But don't worry about me, if Lady Caterina says I have to take classes all day and do this, that, and the other thing, then that's what I'll do. If I just sit and brood, I'll be completely useless."

**Father Havel**: "Then... if you're certain you're still up to this, we'll resume our classes tomorrow."

**Me**: "I'll be fine, Father Havel, honest. If I can just get a good night's sleep tonight, I'll be good to go."

**Father Tres**: "Sister Johanna Sinclair."

**Me**: "Yes, Father?"

**Father Tres**: "Your earlier incident was reported to Cardinal Sforza."

**Me**: "Oh, great. How much trouble am I in _now_?"

**Abel**: "Maybe it would help if I went to her Eminence and explained."

**Father Tres**: "Explanations are not necessary. Restrictions have been set about Sister Johanna Sinclair leaving the grounds of the Vatican."

**Me**: "_Restrictions_? What are they going to do, lock me in my room?"

**Father Tres**: "Negative."

**WWW**: "Then what does her Eminence have in mind?"

**Father Tres**: "Sister Johanna Sinclair will not be allowed off the premises unless either in the presence of a fully qualified AX member..."

**Me**: "Oh for the love of... I don't need a babysitter!"

**WWW**: "You said 'either,' Father Tres. What is the alternative?"

**Father Tres**: "... Sister Johanna Sinclair must complete standard AX self-defense and weapons training."

**Me**: "_WHAT_?!"

**Father Havel**: "And I take it that Cardinal Caterina asked that you be the one to train her?"

**Father Tres**: "Positive."

_To be continued_...


	15. Nuns Just Wanna Have Fun

_Note: ALL RIGHT ALREADY! I know it's been a few days since I updated this, but I was waiting for more votes on my poll... now that I have a slightly better idea of what people want, I can proceed! I'm glad to know that people are enjoying my story so much, even as slightly angsty as it was getting. But as promised, it's back to fun, games, and hilarious misunderstandings..._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XV**

**Sister Esther**: "Come on, Johanna, it's time to get up..."

**Me**: "Go away..."

**Sister Esther**: "You're going to be late..."

**Me**: "Five more minutes..."

**Sister Esther**: "I know you've been busy, but it really is time to get up!"

**Me**: "It's been a week, Esther, come on, even AX members should be allowed to sleep in on _Saturdays_!"

**Sister Noelle**: "Is she STILL in bed? Johanna, you're going to miss breakfast!"

**Me**: "Oh, Noelle, not you, too... don't _either_ of you believe in sleeping late?"

**Sister Noelle**: "AX members don't get vacation time."

**Me**: "Not even personal days?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Nope... come on, time to get up!"

**Me**: "You two are so _mean_..."

**Sister Noelle**: "Esther, go get Father Nightroad."

**Me**: "As if having Father Nightroad in my bedroom is any incentive to get out of bed..."

**Sister Esther:** "What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

**Me**: "Nothing..."

**

* * *

Abel**: "Yes, Noelle?" 

**Sister Noelle**: "It seems that Sister Johanna is determined to sleep in... I thought you might be able to convince her to get up."

**Abel**: "Ah. Your wish is my command."

**Me**: "Why do I not like the sound of that- no- hey- FATHER!"

**Abel**: "Come on, Johanna, time to get up!"

**Me**: "STOP TICKLING ME!"

**Abel**: "Not until you get out of bed..."

**Me**: "Please- stop- Father-"

**Abel**: "Kicking me won't make me stop..."

**Me**: "Father- stop it, I'm going to _fall_-"

**Abel**: "GYAH!"

**Me**: "Owwwwwwwwww..."

**Abel**: "You didn't tell me you slept _naked_!"

**Me**: "You never asked."

**Abel**: "Um... uh... m-m-maybe I should leave while you get dressed. And no getting back into bed!"

**

* * *

Father Leon**: "So you finally made it down to breakfast- hey, what's with the bruise?" 

**Me**: "I whacked my head on the bedpost falling out of bed."

**WWW**: "Looks rather painful..."

**Me**: "It is."

**Father Leon**: "How'd you manage to hit your head?"

**Me**: "Trying to escape the clutches of Father Nightroad."

**Father Leon**: "So much for the vow of chastity..."

**Abel**: "Get your mind out of the gutter, Leon, it was _nothing_ like that."

**Father Leon**: "So how come you're blushing?"

**Abel**: "None of your business- STOP LAUGHING, JOHANNA!"

**WWW**: "By the way, Johanna, I've just received word from her Eminence that Father Tres has been dispatched on a temporary assignment, so no training with him today."

**Me**: "_Finally_, a day off. Maybe now my ears will stop ringing from constant gunfire on the practice range."

**Father Havel**: "We, however, still have lessons."

**Me**: "But it's _Saturday_! Just one day off, please?"

**Father Havel**: "No."

**Me**: "_Please_? I'll be good, I _swear_..."

**Father Havel**: "Johanna..."

**Father Leon**: "Oh, come on, Vaclav, cut the girl some slack."

**Me**: "Come on, say yes, you know you want to. I'll stay out of trouble, I'll even take Father Leon with me!"

**Abel**: "That's _your_ idea of staying out of trouble?"

**Me**: "Please, Father Havel, say yes... just one day for fun."

**Father Havel**: "But you still have so much to catch up on..."

**Me**: "All work and no play makes Johanna a raving psychotic."

**Father Havel**: "No."

**Me**: "Poo-head."

**Abel**: "WHAT was that?!"

**Me**: "It's not FAIR..."

**WWW**: "Really, Johanna-"

**Me**: "Cooped up twenty-four seven with a group of really hot guys..."

**Abel**: "Thank you..."

**Me**: "... except they're all _priests_ who don't believe in having _fun_..."

**Father Havel**: "I never said THAT!"

**Me**: "Now I get to spend all day _studying_ when it's so _nice_ out..."

**Father Havel**: "JOHANNA!"

**Me**: "What?"

**Father Havel**: "Try not to let Father Leon get into too much trouble while you two are gone."

**Father Leon**: "Trouble? ME?!"

_To be continued_...


	16. On the Loose and Out of Control

_Note: I apologize for the delay in getting this chapter written. I was completely blindsided by a medical problem that I THOUGHT was under control, and as any of you who might have been on painkillers know, Vicodin is NOT conducive to clear thinking and writing. (To get an idea of me creating under the influence of Vicodin, hit my LJ and look for a picture I did of Shimada Kambei from SAMURAI 7 under the link of "What samurai dream about...")_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Chapter XVI**

**Me**: "Thank God, I thought I was never going to get out of there! I wonder if I can get away with changing clothes first."

**Father Leon**: "You don't HAVE any other clothes."

**Me**: "I have the stuff I came here in."

**Father Leon**: "You'd stand out like a sore thumb if you do that."

**Me**: "Oh, and us both wearing our Vatican robes and partying our way across Rome ISN'T going to attract attention?"

**Father Leon**: "Just act like what you're wearing is regular street clothes. It's all about the attitude."

**Me**: "Ah, so that's how you get away with looking like that."

**Father Leon**: "Like what?"

**Me**: "Nothing, just pretend you didn't see me put my foot in my mouth. So where are we heading first?"

**Father Leon**: "Ever been to the Spanish Steps?"

**Me**: "Not for a thousand years."

**Father Leon**: "Shall we?"

**Me**: "Lead on!"

**

* * *

Father Leon**: "You like flowers?" 

**Me**: "Love them... hey!"

**Father Leon**: "Shhhhhhh. Pretend you didn't see me swipe these-"

**Flower seller**: "Hey!"

**Me**: "Quanto sono i fiori?" _How much are the flowers?_

**Flower seller**: "Per voi, Sorella, due dinari." _For you, Sister, two dinars._

**Me**: "Grazie molto. Spiacente per la difficoltà." _Thanks very much. Sorry for the difficulty._

**Flower seller**: "Siete benvenuti, Sorella... Padre." _You're welcome, Sister... Father._

**Father Leon**: "That's right, I forgot you spoke Italian- hey, what are you-?"

**Me**: "One for me, and one for you. Goes nicely in your hair..."

**Father Leon**: "Minx."

**Me**: "Why didn't you tell me you didn't have any money? I don't mind paying my own way."

**Father Leon**: "You don't have money either."

**Me**: "Her Eminence gave me my stipend yesterday."

**Father Leon**: "Fine, you can pay for lunch."

**

* * *

Me**: "Are nuns and priests allowed to drink?" 

**Father Leon**: "I'm from Hispania... we produce almost as much wine as Alta."

**Me**: "I'll take that as a yes."

**Nearby matron**: "Shocking... to see a priest and nun carrying on in public..."

**Nearby patron**: "... hard to believe..."

**Me**: "Excuse ME?!"

**Father Leon**: "Just ignore them, Sister Johanna."

**Me**: "Sitting here talking is hardly what I'd call 'carrying on.' THIS is what I'd call 'carrying on.'"

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, sit d-mmphh-"

**Nearby matron**: "WELL, I NEVER-"

**Me**: "THAT'S obvious."

**Father Leon**: "Oh, boy..."

**Me**: "In future, madam, kindly keep your rude comments to yourself."

**Father Leon**: "You really aren't one to beat around the bush, are you?"

**Me**: "Sorry about that."

**Father Leon**: "Hey, I'm not going to complain about getting kissed like that, even if it was just to drive that old bat out of here."

**Me**: "Yeah, but it was inappropriate."

**Father Leon**: "Like that matters to either one of us. Come on, stop moping and smile, damn it. Otherwise, I'm going to go and steal you another flower."

**Me**: "Thanks, Father."

**Father Leon**: "Besides, now I have something to really give Father Four-Eyes a hard time about."

**Me**: "What? You mean me kissing you? No, Father Leon, you _wouldn't_... you _would_."

**Father Leon**: "Come on, I'll race you to the top of the steps."

**Me**: "You're on, hotshot. Hey, wait a-"

**

* * *

Father Leon**: "What took you so long?" 

**Me**: "Oh, shut up... I'm in a dress and heels, and you're obviously in much better shape than I am. Small wonder you were going to... oh..."

**Father Leon**: "Beautiful up here, isn't it? I haven't been to this park in ages."

**Me**: "I'd forgotten how lovely Rome is... it really is the Eternal City, isn't it..."

**Father Leon**: "By the way... thanks."

**Me**: "For what?"

**Father Leon**: "For helping me get out for the day... normally I can't leave the Vatican when I'm sent to Rome on assignment unless partnered with someone."

**Me**: "Why on earth not?"

**Father Leon**: "Because I'm a convicted felon, that's why not. I can't remember the last time I was allowed just to have fun."

**Me**: "Get out, you're not a criminal."

**Father Leon**: "Yes, I am. Doing hard time for multiple homicide."

**Me**: "But... but WHY?!"

**Father Leon**: "Long, sad story with no ending. Ask me about it again some time when we both feel like being depressed. Don't waste a day like today thinking about it."

**Me**: "Okay..."

**Young man**: "Hey, Father, can you spare some change?"

**Father Leon: **"Sorry, I don't have any cash."

**Young man**: "Sister?"

**Me**: "Um, just a moment- HEY!

**

* * *

Sister Kate**: "_Iron Maiden calling Dandelion_... _The _Iron Maiden'_s sensors are picking up some wild energy readings just now, not ten feet from where you are_..." **

* * *

Me**: "GET BACK HERE, YOU SCUMSUCKING _THIEF_!" 

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, what-?"

**Me**: "I... SAID... _STOP_!!!"

**Young man**: "W-what's... h-happening... to...?"

**Father Leon:** "Johanna, stop it!"

**Sister Kate**: "_Father Leon, answer me! What's going on down there?_"

**Me**: "Oh... my... God..."

**

* * *

Father Leon**: "He's unconscious, but he's still alive..." 

**Me**: "I... I didn't mean to... I _swear_..."

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, what the _hell_ did you _do_?!"

**Sister Kate**: "_Leon, what in God's name just happened?_"

**Father Leon**: "What just happened is Johanna just threw a huge load of fertilizer into the ventilator."

**Sister Kate**: "_What...? You mean that power surge was...?_"

**Little girl**: "Look, daddy, it's snowing!"

**Man**: "Yes, honey... but... it's March."

**Woman**: "But then why are the leaves on the trees red?"

**Me**: "Father Havel is going to kill me..."

_To be continued_...


	17. So Much for Secrets

_Note: Yes, I am very aware that a lot of you were going "WTF" at the end of the last chapter, wondering exactly what it was Johanna did... well, in my defense, not only were you given a hint of a warning a few chapters back when Noelle tried to 'read' her, but I did also remind you that I was on meds at the time. However..._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XVII**

**Police**: "Halt! Identify yourselves and your business here!"

**Sister Noelle**: "Sister Noelle Bor, Ministry of Holy Affairs for the Vatican. Accompanying me are Father William Walter Wordsworth, Father Vaclav Havel, and Father Abel Nightroad. Two of our colleagues, Sister Johanna Sinclair and Father Leon Garcia de Asturias, were involved in this... incident."

**Police**: "Very well... you may pass."

**Sister Noelle**: "There's Johanna and Leon... I'll try and talk to her, and send Leon over to you three."

**Abel**: "Thanks, Noelle."

**WWW**: "Hmmm... now this is _most_ intriguing."

**Father Havel**: "'Most intriguing' can cover a lot, William. Can we get something approaching a scientific explanation for this? Assuming that one exists, that is."

**WWW**: "Well, strictly as a hypothesis, it would appear that within a very restricted area, the power surge that the _Iron Maiden_ detected was temporal in nature."

**Father Leon**: "Can we get that in _non_-Professor-speak?"

**WWW**: "Somehow time was disrupted. Note that despite the fact it's spring, for a short while, it was snowing, but only _here_. Also note that several of the trees in the park are displaying leaves out of season."

**Abel**: "But that's impossible!"

**WWW**: "Not when you consider the source of the energy."

**Abel**: "Sister Kate said that whatever it was, it was within _ten feet_ of Leon. You'd think even _he_ would have noticed something like that!"

**Father Leon**: "I did... and she's sitting right over there talking to Noelle."

**Abel**: "You mean JOHANNA?!"

**WWW**: "Johanna is herself here because of some temporal anomaly of one kind or another. It's only logical to accept that she may have generated _this_ anomaly herself."

**Father Havel**: "That's ridiculous."

**WWW**: "Then there was Noelle's reaction when she tried to 'read' Johanna a week ago. It was as though something were blocking her."

**Abel**: "But what about that young man? What happened to him?"

**WWW**: "I imagine that the shock of temporal energy being released was overwhelming enough to render him unconscious. According to Father Leon, Johanna had managed to catch hold of the thief's wrist just before he collapsed."

**Father Leon**: "But she's touched us before... heck, she'd even k-..."

**Abel**: "Even... what?"

**Father Leon**: "Nothing."

**Father Havel**: "Why are you blushing?"

**Father Leon**: "It's not important... at any rate, my point is, nothing like that has happened to any of _us_, so what was different about her grabbing hold of that thief?"

**WWW**: "Sufficient stress, motivation, or random coincidence. Without further testing, it's impossible to say."

**Sister Noelle**: "We need to get Johanna back to the Vatican. She's bordering on shock, although she's trying to hide it."

**WWW**: "Have they cleared Johanna and Leon to leave?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Yes, the police have already collected their statements."

**Father Havel**: "There's no way that we're going to be able to keep this under wraps any more. Cardinal Caterina is working with the local police on the matter, but the word is going to spread about this like wildfire."

**Father Leon:** "You think she could undo whatever she did?"

**WWW**: "I think it would be _extremely_ dangerous to have Johanna try and duplicate whatever she did unless in controlled circumstances, but I guess now we have the answer as to why you couldn't read her just after she appeared."

**Sister Noelle**: "It certainly makes sense, but now her thoughts are wide open. And what I'm getting from her is confusion, guilt, and more than a little fear."

**Abel**: "I'll talk to her..."

**Sister Noelle**: "Abel..."

**Abel**: "Yes?"

**Sister Noelle**: "Don't push her."

**

* * *

Abel:** "Johanna...?" 

**Me**: "Father Nightroad, I _swear_ I didn't mean to hurt him-"

**Abel**: "It's all right, Johanna, I'm not here to punish you. Are you all right?"

**Me**: "No."

**Abel**: "Johanna, it's okay, we're going to try and help you through this-"

**Me**: "Don't touch me, Father, I don't want to hurt you, too!"

**Abel**: "I'll take that chance. Come here."

**Me**: "But-"

**Abel**: "Hush... just relax."

**Me**: "I'm sorry, Father Abel..."

**Abel**: "What happened?"

**Me**: "There was this... loud _ZISH_ sound, like the world's biggest fly hitting a bug zapper. Next thing I knew, it's snowing, the trees look different, and the guy who tried to rob me was unconscious on the ground."

**Abel**: "I see... and you have no idea what you did?"

**Me**: "No... all I wanted was to get out and have some fun, and now _this_. Father Havel is going to _kill_ me."

**Abel**: "Father Havel is _not_ going to kill you."

**Me**: "You sure?"

**Abel**: "I won't let him. But I am curious about something..."

**Me**: "I'm curious about a lot of things... what are _you_ curious about?"

**Abel**: "It was something that Leon said..."

**Me**: "Oh, for the love of God, he actually TOLD you?!"

**Abel**: "Huh?"

**Me**: "Father Leon, I didn't think you'd actually TELL Father Nightroad about that!"

**Father Leon**: "Don't look at me, I didn't tell him."

**Abel**: "Didn't tell me what?"

**Me, Father Leon**: "Nothing."

**Sister Kate**: "_Iron Maiden calling AX field team_."

**Abel**: "Father Abel here, Kate. What is it?"

**Sister Kate**: "_You have a problem... correction, you have two_."

**Father Leon**: "Define 'problem.'"

**Sister Kate**: "_Brother Petro and Sister Paula. They're on their way_."

**Abel**: "WHAT?!"

**Sister Kate**: "_You've_ got _to get Johanna out of there... and_ now."

_To be continued_...


	18. The Hunters and the Hunted

_Note: Here it is - what everyone has been waiting for since this story first appeared... Johanna vs the Inquisition. And for any of you who think that I would never do something this crazy... _

_Think again._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XVIII**

**Abel**: "We can't let them get their hands on her!"

**Me**: "So what now?"

**Abel**: "Father Havel, are you strong enough to carry her and still fly?"

**Father Havel**: "Yes, but if I have my shroud field up as well, it'll drain me too quickly to get either of us very far."

**Abel**: "I'm not concerned about 'far,' I'm concerned about 'not here.' Rome is big enough that even the Inquisition can't be everywhere at once.

**Sister Kate**: "Actually, depending on how badly they want her... yes, they can."

**Abel**: "Then Father Leon and I will also separate and head in different directions... it might help to throw them off your trail."

**Me**: "But what about the rest of you?"

**Sister Noelle**: "We'll do what we can to slow them down."

**Father Havel**: "Come _on_, Johanna."

**Me**: "But... I can't just leave them behind to clean up my mess!"

**Abel**: "_This_ we can live with... you in the hands of the Inquisition is another matter entirely."

**Me**: "But, Father..."

**Abel**: "GO!"

**Me**: "Damn it all to hell..."

* * *

**Brother Petro**: "I am Brother Petro, head of the Inquisitorial Department. This is my second in command, Sister Paula. Hand over the heretic." 

**WWW**: "The thief is currently in custody with the Rome police. A bit extreme, sending the Inquisitorial Department to deal with a simple assault on two Vatican operatives."

**Sister Paula**: "We're all well aware that this is _not_ about the assault on your operatives. Evidence suggests heretical activity, and it is within our jurisdiction to find out what happened. Where is the Sister involved in this incident?"

**Sister Noelle**: "I'm afraid she's no longer here. She and several other AX members received dispatches regarding other duties and left, after leaving their statements with the police."

**Brother Petro**: "I highly doubt that. And I will note both your statements and your behaviour in my report to his Eminence, Cardinal Francesco."

**Sister Kate**: "As will we, in _our_ report to her Eminence, Cardinal Caterina."

* * *

**Father Havel**: "Sorry... must stop here. Have to rest..." 

**Me**: "Are you giving me a hard time about my weight?"

**Father Havel**: "How can you make jokes at a time like this?"

**Me**: "I laugh to keep from hanging myself sometimes."

**Father Havel**: "They must... really want you... we've already... avoided six Inquisition patrols..."

**Me**: "Well, with any luck, we should be safe here for a little while at least-"

**Inquisitorial agent**: "You there, stop!"

**Me**: "Or not..."

**Father Havel**: "I don't... have the strength... to put up my shroud field and carry you."

**Me**: "Fine... you stay here then, you're exhausted enough as it is."

**Father Havel**: "Wha- Johanna, come back!"

* * *

**Inquisitorial agent**: "Team seven to Brother Petro. Sir, we've found her!" 

**Brother Petro**: "Where is she?"

**Inquisitorial agent**: "Subject was last seen entering the Colosseum."

**Sister Paula**: "How in God's name did she get all the way out there?"

**Inquisitorial agent**: "Another AX operative was helping her."

**Brother Petro**: "Havel... I should have known..."

* * *

**Me**: "God _damn_ it, don't they _ever_ give up?!" 

**Brother Petro**: "Found you!"

**Me**: "GYAH! WHERE THE HELL DID YOU-"

**Brother Petro**: "Sister Johanna Sinclair, by the authority invested in me by his Holiness Pope Alessandro, you are under arrest for suspicion of heresy. Surrender, and you will face an official Inquisition to determine your innocence."

**Me**: "Like _hell_ I will!"

**Brother Petro**: "It's useless to run from a warrior of God!"

**Me**: "You'd be surprised what a fear for your life can motivate you to do!"

**Father Havel**: "Johanna, behind you!"

**Sister Paula**: "There's no escaping this way. Surrender."

**Me**: "No."

**Brother Petro**: "There's nowhere left to run. Come away from the edge, now."

**Me**: "I won't... I _can't_."

**Sister Paula**: "In case you didn't know, it's a fall of one hundred and sixty feet to the pavement from where you're standing."

**Brother Petro**: "There's only one way out of this alive. Surrender quietly, and you might just have a chance to prove your innocence before God and the Church."

**Me**: "Get real, just how stupid do you think I am? The minute I get within reach of you, you're going to kill me!"

**Brother Petro**: "But you also can't stand there all day."

**Me**: "You want to bet?"

**Father Havel**: "Petro, leave her alone... you don't understand-"

**Me**: "Please, Father Havel, stay out of this!"

**Brother Petro**: "I think I understand a heretic when I see one... and I should imagine that you would as well!"

**Father Havel**: "She's not a heretic, Petro! _Please_!"

**Sister Paula**: "If she truly has nothing to hide, then she will submit to an official Inquisition to prove she's innocent!"

**Me**: "I'd rather die, thanks."

**Father Havel**: "No!"

**Me**: "I'm sorry, Father... I'm just... not brave enough to suffer for what I believe in..."

**Brother Petro**: "Stop walking backward!"

**Me**: "Nor am I brave enough to kill for it..."

**Father Havel**: "Johanna, stop, you don't have to do this-"

**Me**: "But deep down... I hope to think I'm brave enough to die for it."

**Sister Paula**: "Suicide is a mortal sin!"

**Me**: "Unfortunately, that argument won't work on me."

**Brother Petro**: "Stop! Don't m-"

**Me**: "If I am, after all... a heretic."

**Brother Petro**: "STOP!"

**Me**: "Goodbye, Father... tell the others that... I'm so sorry."

**Father Havel**: "JOHANNA, NO!"

_To be continued_...


	19. Knight Captures Queen's Pawn

_Note: As bizarre as this might sound, I took it as a compliment that after the last chapter, several of you were sending me PMs threatening to kill ME if I killed Johanna with the stunt she pulled in "The Hunters and the Hunted." It was hilarious how many of you sent me ways to write myself out of that situation so I could keep going with the story. (Either that, or you all are just sadists who want to see how she's going to deal with undergoing an official Inquisition at the hands of Francesco.)_

_Which reminds me... open call to those reading "Unexpected Results" - I am looking for art for this story. Send me a PM if interested - I have a nifty project in mind and could use some help!_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XIX**

**Brother Petro**: "You're not getting away that easily..."

**Me**: "Catch me if you can, then..."

**Sister Paula**: "PETRO!"

**Brother Petro**: "GOT YOU!"

**Me**: "YOU HAVE _GOT_ TO BE FU-"

**Brother Petro**: "Did you think that you would actually be able to successfully escape from God's holy avenger on Earth?"

**Me**: "I didn't know you could actually FLY!"

**Brother Petro**: "I never had any intention of letting you fall."

**Me**: "I'm surprised. I figured that with your zealous fanaticism, you'd have just shoved me right off the edge if you had your way."

**Brother Petro**: "You were unarmed and defenseless. It would have been the lowest dishonor to kill you in such a manner. Besides..."

**Me**: "Besides what?"

**Brother Petro**: "You were willing to die for your beliefs... even for a heretic, that has to count for _something_ in this world."

**Me**: "But not enough to let me go... you should have let me die."

**Brother Petro**: "Depending on the results of your inquisition... you may get your wish anyway."

* * *

**Abel**: "Cardinal Caterina, have you seen Johanna? Do you know what's happened to her?" 

**Father Havel**: "I'm afraid that... my attempts to help Johanna escape the Inquisition were unsuccessful."

**Abel**: "You mean they..."

**Father Havel**: "Rather than fall into the hands of the Inquisitorial Department, Johanna actually tried to commit suicide by deliberately letting herself fall from the top of the Colosseum."

**Sister Esther**: "No, s-she... she can't be... dead..."

**Father Havel**: "Unfortunately, she didn't realize that Brother Petro's armor gives him limited flight. He was able to catch her before she hit the ground."

**Caterina**: "However, Sister Johanna is now being held in custody by the Inquisitorial Department."

**Sister Noelle**: "What do you mean, being held in custody? She's an AX member, they can't keep her under anything more than house arrest."

**Caterina**: "If it were just the matter of her religious beliefs. However, Francesco is arguing that her abilities as a 'witch' render her a danger to Vatican security... so they are holding her in the Inquisition compound's maximum security wing... more specifically... the Bastille."

**WWW**: "_WHAT_?!"

**Abel**: "Have they lost their _minds_? That's where they hold Methusaleh!"

**Caterina**: "She is also being held in solitary confinement. However, as the Inquisitorial Department is understandably concerned about her manifesting her talent, potentially causing harm to herself or to others, she is being kept under sedation until the time of her inquisition."

**Father Leon**: "Your Eminence, I take full responsibility. If only I-"

**Caterina**: "You can't blame yourself for the incident in Borghese Park, Leon. At that point, none of us had any idea that Johanna would manifest any sort of ability. I do not hold any of you responsible for what happened. Right now, our primary concern is how to move forward."

**Sister Kate**: "Have you spoken to Cardinal Francesco?"

**Caterina**: "Yes, but he is adamantly refusing to release her, AX status notwithstanding. The official stance is that the AX has gone unsupervised for far too long, and that investigative measures are going to be implemented... starting with Johanna."

**WWW**: "Unfortunately, she's the one person in the AX whose past _cannot_ withstand the scrutiny of an official inquisition. As soon as her true identity and religious beliefs are discovered, to say nothing of these temporal disruptions of hers..."

**Father Havel**: "... Francesco and Petro won't hesitate to have her executed."

**Sister Esther**: "Your Eminence, isn't there _anything_ that we can do?"

**Caterina**: "I am doing everything that I can in my power, and more, to have Johanna released, but I confess that... things look hopeless for her, Sister Esther."

**Sister Noelle**: "Have you seen her at all?"

**Caterina**: "Yes, that much I was able to do. She is trying so hard to be brave, but... I don't need Noelle's abilities to know that she is absolutely terrified of what is going to happen to her."

**Father Havel**: "Perhaps appealing to his Holiness on her behalf..."

**Father Leon**: "With as much sway as Francesco's got over him, that won't do any good. And the Cardinal assembly is likely to fall in line behind him anyway."

**Sister Esther**: "So what, we're just going to leave her to die?"

**Abel**: "I am _not_ going to let that happen."

**Caterina**: "There is nothing we can do, Abel-"

**Abel**: "_Officially_..."

**Caterina**: "Abel, where are you-?"

* * *

**Father Leon**: "So, what's the plan, Four-Eyes?" 

**Abel**: "Leon, what are you doing here?"

**Father Leon**: "What, you think you're the only one who wants to help Johanna?"

**Abel**: "I'm not asking _anyone_ else to get involved in this."

**WWW**: "As if we'd let you do this alone."

**Abel**: "Professor!"

**Sister Noelle**: "Face it, Abel... you're getting help on this one, whether you like it or not."

**Abel**: "But... her Eminence... we still have to consider the AX!"

**Sister Kate**: "Exactly, which is why you need all of us."

**Abel**: "What?"

**Father Havel**: "You were right earlier... officially, her Eminence can do nothing... but the AX hardly operates on just the 'official' level, now does it?"

**Sister Esther**: "And besides, we all know how you get into trouble on your own!"

**Abel**: "Thank you... all of you."

_To be continued_...


	20. Comes the Inquisitor

_Note: Sorry this chapter took a while... getting Francesco's bombastic quality right was a pain in the tail. However, here we go again... and would someone please explain why everyone thinks the AX's rescue attempt should go horribly wrong somehow?_

_(And the title of the chapter is a nod to one of my favorite TV series - 'Babylon 5.')_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XX**

**Caterina**: "Holiness, I object to this treatment of my operative."

**Francesco**: "You have provided no proof that she is not a danger to herself or those around her. Are you proposing we put the Vatican and those within its walls at risk?"

**Caterina**: "I'm proposing nothing of the sort. But how is Johanna expected to defend herself if she is being given no opportunity to prepare?"

**Alessandro**: "But Sister... if she's really that dangerous..."

**Caterina**: "Holiness, she has been here for at least a full week. It was not until she was physically attacked that she manifested anything unusual."

**Francesco**: "Then what do _you_ recommend?"

**Caterina**: "I will appoint one of my operatives to act in her stead. He is familiar with her and her background; however, I will _not_ allow you to keep her sedated during her own inquisition. I will concede that for security she be constrained, but she is to be conscious, aware, and alert."

**Alessandro**: "Then... I guess... it would be all right."

**Caterina**: "Thank you, Holiness. With your permission, I will send the appointed operative to visit her later today."

**Francesco**: "Be advised, however, that her inquisition is scheduled for tomorrow."

**Alessandro**: "W-what?! They're to have... only _one_ day... to prepare?!"

**Francesco**: "Thus the wheat is separated from the chaff. Unless Caterina is so desperate to find anything of value that might redeem her that she requires more time..."

**Caterina**: "No. Tomorrow will be fine."

* * *

**Francesco**: "It is time... let the inquisition of the heretic, Johanna Sinclair, now begin. Bring in the accused." 

**Abel**: "Chin up, Johanna... it will be all right."

**Francesco**: "We shall see. Brother Petro... you may proceed."

**Me**: "Let go of me!"

**Caterina**: "Wait, what are you _doing_?"

**Francesco**: "Thanks to the efforts of one of your other operatives, this was recovered from Amsterdam, where it had previously been used by the vampires of the city."

**Abel**: "What?!"

**Francesco**: "It is a device that retrieves memories... with a few modifications, it now allows the subject's memories to be displayed, although unfortunately we cannot hear what the subject heard. With this, we can ascertain the truth far more efficiently."

**Caterina**: "This is an absolute _outrage_!"

**Francesco**: "However, we must be thorough, my dear Caterina. After all, a woman's life is at stake. We should be nothing less than completely certain that she is free of _any_ stigma or doubt. Johanna Sinclair, when and where did you take your vows of ordination?"

**Caterina**: "Are you _actually_ doubting her status as a bride of Christ?!"

**Me**: "Fifteen years ago, at the Santa Cecilia in Trastevere."

**Abel**: "Here are the records confirming her ordination."

**First cardinal**: "And your service for the last fifteen years?"

**Me**: "I felt I could better serve the world by travelling it. No place is beyond God's sight or care."

**Abel**: "These are the various parishes or towns that she has been visiting since then. As you can see, she has travelled quite extensively through Albion, the Franc Kingdom, and Alta."

**Second cardinal**: "Why travel so much, and beginning at such a young age?"

**Abel**: "Given her linguistic skills, Sister Johanna was an obvious choice to fill certain diplomatic or liaison tasks."

**Francesco**: "And how many languages are you familiar with?"

**Me**: "English, French, Italian, Latin, ancient Greek, Armenian... passable familiarity with a few older languages."

**Third cardinal**: "Impressive... what of your family?"

**Me**: "I don't speak to them, nor they to me. It's better that way."

**Caterina**: "Are you satisfied with _that_, at least?"

**Francesco**: "For the moment... show us the events in Borghese Park..."

**Inquisitor**: "Yes, your Eminence."

**Me**: "AAAAAAAAGGGGHHHH!"

**Abel**: "Stop it, can't you see this is hurting her?!"

**Francesco**: "What is more important to you, Father? Her physical condition, or the truth?"

**Second cardinal**: "Disgraceful, to think that a woman of the cloth should be attacked, and in _Rome_, no less..."

**First cardinal**: "Strange... why is the image so faint?"

**Inquisitor**: "There is so much light in the image that it has washed out everything else."

**Third cardinal**: "God in Heaven... it's like she summoned a bolt of lightning to strike him down."

**First cardinal**: "The terror on his face..."

**Francesco**: "We have seen enough."

**Inquisitor**: "Yes, your Eminence."

**Me**: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhh..."

**Francesco**: "As I thought... the woman is a witch."

**Abel**: "Your Eminence, could it not just as easily be construed that God, in His anger at seeing one of His chosen so assaulted, struck down the thief?"

**Caterina**: "He raises a very good point, brother."

**Francesco**: "Are you implying that she has divine powers?"

**Abel**: "There are documented cases of those of true devotion to God being gifted in such a manner. Who is to say that Johanna is not one of these?"

**Francesco**: "We shall test your theory, then, Father Nightroad..."

**Abel**: "T-test it?"

**Francesco**: "If she is one of God's chosen, then He will act to spare her. If not... blessed are those who perish in the name of the Lord."

**Me**: "_What_?!"

**Caterina**: "Brother-"

**Francesco**: "Johanna Sinclair, you will have tonight to make your peace with God. Tomorrow morning at dawn, we will have the truth of this matter... through trial by fire."

**Me**: "No, wait, _please_-!"

**Francesco**: "Take her away."

_To be continued_...


	21. It's Always Darkest Just Before the Dawn

_Note: It still never ceases to amaze me how many people are getting into this. I swear, EVERY SINGLE REVIEWER had the same response to the last chapter (both on here AND the two LJs it's posted in). You all loved the chapter... and you all HATED Francesco. Go me._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXI**

**Sister Kate**: "This _can't_ be happening... they're actually going to burn Johanna at the _stake_?!"

**Father Havel**: "Not exactly. Even if the Inquisition's principles have not moved with the times, their technology has. She will face a firing squad using flamethrowers."

**Sister Esther**: "That's BARBARIC!"

**Caterina**: "I agree. However, the Inquisitorial Department falls completely under Francesco's jurisdiction. I have no say in how he handles matters from here on out. My main concern now, however, is making sure that someone be allowed access to Johanna. Even Francesco acknowledges that she has the right to be shriven prior to her impending trial."

**WWW**: "But as Johanna is so fond of pointing out... she's not Catholic."

**Caterina**: "That is beside the point. If we are to affirm that in our eyes she is a loyal Vatican operative, we _must_ keep up appearances. And at the very least, it will allow her the chance to unburden herself before facing that nightmare trial of hers tomorrow. To that end, Father Nightroad, I am appointing you."

**Abel**: "Why?"

**Caterina**: "I'd have thought that obvious. To implement whatever it is you're planning, of course. Which reminds me... Sister Kate?"

**Sister Kate**: "Yes, your Eminence?"

**Caterina**: "The following orders are to be issued..."

* * *

**Abel**: "I am here by order of her Eminence, Cardinal Sforza, to hear the prisoner's confession." 

**Inquisitorial guard**: "You must surrender your weapon before entering, Father."

**Abel**: "I figured as much. Here you are. And, um... if it's not too much to ask... are the rooms sound-proofed? Confession _is_ a private sacrament, you know."

**Inquisitorial guard**: "All cells, especially in the Bastille, are constantly monitored."

**Abel**: "Then can we be escorted somewhere that doesn't have video cameras and microphones? If the woman is going to offer her confession, she deserves to offer it in privacy."

**Inquisitorial guard**: "Just a moment, Father."

**Abel**: "No problem, I'll wait..."

**Inquisitorial guard**: "As a one-time courtesy, we will disable the video and audio feeds from her cell. However, you are to be searched prior to entry, and the number of guards outside will be doubled until you leave."

**Abel**: "Searched?!"

**Inquisitorial guard**: "If you'll step over here, please..."

* * *

**Abel**: "Good evening, Johanna." 

**Me**: "Here to visit the condemned woman?"

**Abel**: "Her Eminence has sent me to hear your confession... I was able to convince the guards to disable the audio/video monitoring of your cell, but there are twice as many guards outside, and they searched me before I came in. Rather thoroughly, I might add. A very uncomfortable experience."

**Me**: "It's not that I don't appreciate you coming, Father, but... I doubt it's going to do much good. But I do want to thank you for trying to help me earlier. And please... thank her Eminence for me, too... and Father Wordsworth and Father Havel and everyone. I just... I just wish it hadn't all been for _nothing_."

**Abel**: "Don't say that, Johanna."

**Me**: "Why not? I _am_ going to die tomorrow, or am I wrong?"

**Abel**: "Well, as things stand now... it is... likely."

**Me**: "Oh, _God_..."

**Abel**: "With the way that you threatened to throw yourself off the top of the Colosseum, I wouldn't have thought you'd be afraid of death."

**Me**: "Death doesn't frighten me... but... this isn't just about a quick fall to the pavement or a gunshot to the head. This is... this is me burning to death. That _does_ frighten me."

**Abel**: "You've... faced death before, I take it."

**Me**: "Yes... death and I are almost friends by now."

**Abel**: "Johanna..."

**Me**: "Oh, _why_ couldn't Brother Petro have just let me fall?"

**Abel**: "BE SILENT!"

**Me**: "Wha-?"

**Abel**: "I will _not_ allow you to give up hope... not while there's even still the _slightest_ chance."

**Me**: "So what do _you_ suggest I do?"

**Abel**: "Pray with me... here and now. I cannot, and _will_ not, believe that God sent you here to us only to die like this."

**Me**: "But I don't believe in God... not like _you_ do."

**Abel**: "Then believe in ME."

* * *

**Father Leon**: "You can't sleep either, huh?" 

**Father Havel**: "No... not when I know what she will have to endure tomorrow."

**Sister Noelle**: "Good evening, Fathers."

**WWW**: "I take it that you two are worrying about the same problem as we are."

**Father Leon**: "I just wish there was something more we could do for her."

**Abel**: "She knows that you are all praying for her, and she sends her thanks."

**Sister Esther**: "Father Nightroad! Did you just get back? How is Johanna?"

**Abel**: "It... it broke my heart to see her... She cried in my arms the entire time I heard her confession. Worse... Johanna seems to have given up all hope."

**Father Leon**: "This from the woman who never gives up?!"

**Abel**: "Yes... But I think the worst thing about all of this is..."

**WWW**: "Is... what?"

**Abel**: "Just before I left... she... she said, 'At least I'll be with my husband again.'"

* * *

**Inquisitorial guard**: "It's time..." 

**Me**: "Yes..."

* * *

**Francesco**: "Johanna Sinclair, this morning you are to undergo trial by fire to determine your innocence before the Heavenly Father. Is your soul prepared?" 

**Me**: "As prepared as it can be. The rest is up to God."

**Francesco**: "Then may God have mercy on your soul."

* * *

**Me**: "Be brave... be brave... it will all be over soon..." 

**Brother Petro**: "I have sent scores of the unrighteous to their eternal reward, but the sight of this turns even my stomach for some reason."

* * *

**Firing squad leader**: "READY!"

* * *

**Me**: "Be brave, be brave, be brave bebrave bebravebebravebebrave-"

* * *

**Firing squad leader**: "AIM!"

* * *

**Me**: "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I DON'T WANT TO DIE!"

_

* * *

_

**Caterina**: "Now." 

_To be continued..._


	22. The AX vs the Inquisition

_Note: And now the whole thing is about to go straight to hell... but as I'd learned when writing my SAMURAI 7 novel "The Sword of the Soul," mass chaos is one of those things I excel at. Granted, the all-dialogue thing was a challenge, but I really do think that this chapter manages to convey the feel of it all quite nicely._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXII**

**Firing squad leader**: "FIRE!"

**Sister Kate**: "Activating Sunburst program..."

* * *

**Sister Paula**: "What the-" 

**Francesco**: "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!"

**Firing squad leader**: "The weapons- they're not functioning!"

* * *

**WWW**: "Well, it's good to know that the jamming signal I installed on the _Iron Maiden_ works." 

**Sister Kate**: "For _once_... Anomaly, this is _Iron Maiden_!"

**Me**: "_Kate_?!"

**Sister Kate**: "The circuit to your bonds has been disrupted. That door they brought you out of - get inside it, and get moving, fast!"

**Me**: "Don't have to tell me twice!"

* * *

**Francesco**: "Don't just stand there, get after her!" 

**Brother Petro**: "But your Eminence, you wanted proof of her innocence..."

**Francesco**: "I WANT HER DEAD!"

**Brother Petro**: "Yes... your Eminence. Paula, take a squad and head for the main entrance!"

**Sister Paula**: "Yes, sir."

**Brother Petro**: "The rest of you, come with me!"

* * *

**Me**: "All right, Kate, I'm inside, which way do I go?" 

**Sister Kate**: "Sixth left, approximately one hundred and ten feet down the corridor you're in."

**Me**: "But all the doors I'm passing have authorization locks, I won't be able to get it open!"

**Sister Kate**: "You'll have all the authorization you'll need."

**Me**: "What's _that_ supposed to mean? And I don't suppose that you have a plan on how to slow down the agents chasing me?"

* * *

**Brother Petro**: "What do you mean, the authorization files have been scrambled?!"

* * *

**Abel**: "You know, Johanna, I have to admit, I'm impressed. That decrypt program you wrote _really_ comes in handy!" 

**Me**: "Father Abel?!"

**Sister Kate**: "Johanna, where are you now?"

**Me**: "Fifth... sixth left. Opening the door now... now I'm in the control room to something that looks like two really big staging areas."

**Sister Kate**: "Exit the control room, the dock in front of it is a transport platform. Get onto it and take it to the bottom, and head for the doors on the other side of the area. But don't get within fifty feet of them."

**Me**: "Why?"

**Sister Kate**: "Father Leon is going to open them for you."

**Me**: "WHAT?!"

* * *

**Brother Petro**: "What was _that_?!"

* * *

**Me**: "Did you have to use that much C4?" 

**Father Leon**: "It worked, didn't it?"

**Sister Kate**: "Once you're through the second loading area, you're almost to the main entrance of the maximum security wing."

**Father Leon**: "Terrific."

**Sister Paula**: "That's far enough, heretic."

**Me**: "Oh, crap."

**Sister Paula**: "It seems that you failed to anticipate a two-pronged attack."

* * *

**Sister Kate**: "Gunslinger..." 

**Father Tres**: "Acknowledged."

* * *

**Sister Paula**: "You have been tried and condemned, Johanna Sinclair. There is no escape for you." 

**Father Havel**: "Actually... I'd say that works both ways."

**Sister Paula**: "What?"

**Father Tres**: "Father Leon Garcia de Asturias. Sister Johanna Sinclair. Recommend course of action is that you both seek cover."

**Me**: "Father Tres?! Where the hell did YOU come fr-"

**Father Havel**: "Good to see you haven't lost your fighting spirit yet, Johanna."

**Father Tres**: "Initiating resident tactical program. Incapacitation mode. Combat... engaged."

**Me**: "HOLY SHI-"

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, Vaclav, get down!"

* * *

**Father Tres**: "Clear." 

**Me**: "Sister Kate, is there anyone you _didn't_ invite to this party?"

**Abel**: "Actually, Johanna, this was _my_ idea..."

**Father Leon**: "'Scuse me? Who was it originally who was insisting on rescuing her all by himself?"

**Sister Kate**: "You can argue about it later... you're not out of this yet. The team pursuing Johanna will be there any second."

* * *

**Inquisitorial agent**: "There they are!" 

**Brother Petro**: "I applaud your efforts and your loyalty to one of your fellow operatives, but this has gone on long enough. Return her to us so she may face her due punishment."

**Father Leon**: "Like hell we will. You have no right to murder an innocent woman."

**Francesco**: "Then kill them! Kill ALL those who defy the authority of the Church!"

**Me**: "OH NO YOU DON'T!"

**Inquisitorial agent**: "What the-"

* * *

**Sister Kate**: "Energy buildup rapidly increasing."

* * *

**Me**: "GET THE HELL AWAY FROM THEM!" 

**Inquisitorial agents**: "AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!"

**Francesco**: "How DARE you?!"

**Me**: "SHUT UP, YOU BASTARD! Right now I have a DOZEN reasons why I should kill you, and only ONE why I _shouldn't_! Pray that I don't forget that one reason!"

**Francesco**: "And what reason is that?"

**Me**: "Because I'm not like _you_."

**Sister Paula**: "Even though you just attacked a dozen Inquisitorial agents?"

**Me**: "They're not dead, they're just unconscious. But if I really push myself, I'm afraid I could kill someone with this ability. Believe me, I never wanted this power, but if you force me, I WILL use it to protect myself and my friends."

**Father Havel**: "Johanna..."

**Brother Petro**: "By all rights, I should kill you where you stand, Johanna Sinclair."

**Me**: "Then kill me. But harm any of my fellow AX members, and I'll take as many of you as I can with me into hell. So..."

**Brother Petro**: "Wha- wait, what are you doing?"

**Me**: "Take this weapon, your Eminence, and kill me now. Not one of your underlings... you."

**Francesco**: "I will not be dictated to, especially by a HERETIC!"

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, are you out of your mind?"

**Me**: "If his Eminence believes so strongly in my death, then I want my blood on his hands. Not on anyone else's."

**Francesco**: "Then to hell with you, heretic!"

**

* * *

Me**: "... so much for that theory." 

**Francesco**: "What... why aren't you-?"

**Me**: "Guess God wants me around a little while longer."

* * *

**Abel**: "Good thing you left the jamming signal going, Sister Kate." 

**Sister Kate**: "I didn't think it would actually _work_ this long."

**WWW**: "What?"

**

* * *

Me**: "Sorry to deny you the pleasure of my death, but I think I've been kept from my duties long enough. So if you'll excuse us... Fathers?" 

**Father Tres**: "Positive."

**Francesco**: "Damn you..."

**Me**: "I am already damned, your Eminence. Good day to you."

_To be continued_...


	23. First Assignment!

_Note: I am so glad that I didn't lose a lot of you after the whole battle between the AX and the Inquisition! Now once again, things calm down a bit... for now. _

_By the way, Sister Kate's response to Father William in this chapter is a tip of the cap to Gwendolyn Lau (the English VA for Sister Kate) in one of her other roles that I love... Narumi Madoka from SPIRAL. Madoka says the_ exact _same thing when her partner makes a correct (but absolutely_ stupid_) observation._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXIII**

**Caterina**: "I'm pleased to see that you're not too much the worse for wear after your ordeal, Johanna."

**Me**: "Your Eminence, I... I don't know what to say. You all risked so _much_... just for me."

**Caterina**: "The AX takes care of their own, Sister. That includes you."

**Me**: "Yes, my lady... and thank you."

**Caterina**: "However, as the result of our recent... clash with the Inquisitorial Department, I intend to make certain that as many of you as possible are beyond the reach of Francesco. To that end, I have assignments for many of you."

**Me**: "Including me?"

**Caterina**: "_Especially_ you. Now, we have received word that Sword Dancer is currently in Antwerp."

**Me**: "Who?"

**Abel**: "I'll explain later."

**Caterina**: "I do _not_ intend to allow a repeat of the incident in Amsterdam. Abel, you, Leon, and Johanna are to leave for Antwerp tomorrow. Warn him that he is not to employ the extreme measures he demonstrated earlier."

**Father Leon**: "And if he doesn't listen?"

**Caterina**: "Then tell him to expect a visit from Gunslinger."

**Abel**: "With all due respect, your Eminence, Johanna hasn't yet had sufficient training to be assigned as field personnel."

**Caterina**: "I'm aware of that. However, to keep her out of Francesco's path, she is to undergo her training in the field. Father Leon will continue her combat/self-defense training, while you are to assist her in mastering the use of our current technology."

**Father Leon**: "Fine by me, I love vacations."

**Me**: "Just my luck... I get to jaunt across Europe with two totally hot guys, but I'm married, they're priests, and I'm supposed to be a nun. The gods have one hell of a sense of humour. Why couldn't this have happened when I was _single_, at least?!"

**Caterina**: "Which reminds me... Sister Johanna, while Father Abel and Father Leon are primarily in charge on this assignment... make sure they turn in _all_ of their receipts. And _whatever_ you do, _don't_ allow them to charter a freighter."

**Me**: "What?"

**Abel**: "You're _never_ going to let that one go, are you?"

**Caterina**: "And one more thing, Sister Johanna. You are not, I repeat, _not_ to use your ability, excepting only life-or-death circumstances. Are we clear?"

**Me**: "Yes, your Eminence."

**Caterina**: "Good. Sister Esther, you are to assist Father Havel in working with Security to prepare for the arrival of Archbishop Alfonso d'Este from Cologne."

**Sister Esther**: "Yes, your Eminence."

**Caterina**: "Sister Kate, you and the Professor are to complete the upgrades on the _Iron Maiden_ using the programming information provided by Johanna last week. Once that is done, or sooner if necessary, you two leave for Antwerp to rendezvous with Abel, Johanna, and Leon."

**Sister Kate**: "Oh, God, not _again_..."

**WWW**: "Really, Kate, you make it sound like travelling with me is an unbearable task."

**Sister Kate**: "_Brilliant_ deduction... you get a cookie!"

**Caterina**: "Sister Noelle, you and Father Tres will remain here in Rome on standby, as you have both recently returned from missions of your own."

**Father Tres**: "Positive."

**Sister Noelle**: "Yes, your Eminence."

**Caterina**: "That will be all, then."

* * *

**Abel**: "Good morning, Johanna. Sleep well?" 

**Me**: "Good morning, Fathers. Apart from being horribly nervous, pretty well, actually. And it beat sleeping in an Inquisition cell, that's for sure. When do we have to be at the station?"

**Father Leon**: "Two hours from now. But first we'll swing by the armoury and make sure that you're issued a sidearm." 

**Me**: "Wha... but... I've only been training with Father Tres for a _week_! That can't be nearly enough time!"

**Abel**: "According to the Vatican rangemaster, you've put in at least four to six hours a day on the firing range under Father Tres."

**Father Tres**: "Positive. Per AX regulations, Sister Johanna Sinclair has demonstrated AX standards marksmanship with two separate firearms, sufficient for clearance for field operations. Data analysis of learning curve for marksmanship standards indicates that she has had firearms training prior to her enlistment in the AX."

**Father Leon**: "Is that true?"

**Me**: "A little, yeah. Not much, but some. Had a couple of friends in college who were firearms fanatics. But I didn't know anything about the care and maintenance of guns, or real shooting for that matter, until Father Tres began teaching me."

**Father Leon**: "Which two did he train her on?"

**Abel**: "Looks like the .45 semiautomatic, and our own preference, the Peacemaker. Speed and stopping power - good choices, Tres."

**Father Leon**: "What, he didn't teach her how to use the Jericho M13?"

**Me**: "I could hardly _hold_ the thing, let alone fire it with anything that _remotely_ resembled accuracy..."

**Father Tres**: "Positive."

**Me**: "But the Jericho was so COOL! _Wicked_ recoil, almost knocked me off my feet, but _still_! And you should have SEEN Father Tres using two of those things at once!"

**Armoury master**: "Hello again, Father Nightroad... I've been expecting you. Here's your sidearm. And here's yours, Father de Asturias. Plus the usual ammunition for you both. Sign here, please."

**Abel**: "Did you receive the forms for Sister Johanna?"

**Armoury master**: "Yes, I did. Here is your .45, Sister. And I'll need your signature as well."

**Me**: "What's that on the barrel of Father Nightroad's gun?"

**Abel**: "_Sanguine et virtute_."

**Me**: "'Blood and virtue.' How appropriate... I just hope it's not an omen of what your missions are usually like..."

**Abel**: "No, of course not... STOP LAUGHING, LEON!"

_To be continued_...


	24. Off to Antwerp

_Note: Now, I don't know about a lot of you, but I loved Sword Dancer from the minute he appeared on-screen. (And total kudos to John Burgmeier, who voices him wonderfully.) Not to mention he is just HOT! So, since this is my story, damn it, I want to have Sword Dancer in it. And so I shall. (In the next couple of chapters, that is.)_

_BTW, sorry for not posting this chapter earlier; the computer at home with the internet connection went down this week. Michelle minus Internet equals Unhappy Camper._

_And today (April 3rd) is my birthday. Go me._

**

* * *

**

**Unexpected Results, Part XXIV**

**Me**: "So, who is this we're being sent to fetch?"

**Father Leon**: "Father Hugue de Watteau. Code name _Sword Dancer_. A fellow AX member who's something of a loose cannon."

**Me**: "Worse than you?"

**Father Leon**: "Maybe a bit... and stop laughing, Four-Eyes."

**Me**: "And her Eminence said something about 'an incident in Amsterdam'?"

**Abel**: "The long and short of it is, a church was attacked there not long ago. The priests and nuns all slaughtered by vampires, save one... a nun, Sister Agnes. The Vatican had to investigate, of course, but because the four Counts are rabidly xenophobic, Lady Caterina had to send in someone who could blend in. Hugue was the only candidate. But... he has a personal vendetta against vampires, and he singlehandedly wiped out the majority of the vampires in Amsterdam at a private gathering... in one night."

**Me**: "Good God... remind me _not_ to get on this guy's bad side."

**Father Leon**: "That's easy enough, you're not a vampire."

**Me**: "Thanks, I feel _so_ much better. But I get the feeling that Father Hugue isn't exactly the type of person who just calmly takes orders."

**Abel**: "He isn't... hence the threat to send Father Tres after him if he doesn't behave."

**Me**: "So we're not just being sent to Antwerp to scold Father Hugue, and then turn around and go home."

**Abel**: "No. Her Eminence didn't want this discussed until the three of us were alone, but... that device that was used on you at your inquisition... well, the former Count of Amsterdam, the late Karel Vandenburg, used it on Sister Agnes to determine who was behind the attack on the church. After your inquisition, Caterina demanded access to it, and found the records of Sister Agnes' memories. The person responsible for the attack... was actually Memling, Count of Antwerp."

**Me**: "One of the other four Counts? Correction, three?"

**Abel**: "Correct. Caterina fears that Hugue is going to assassinate him for his attack on the church."

**Me**: "What?!"

**Father Leon**: "It was one thing for him to take down the vampires in Amsterdam, they were caught completely unprepared. But the word will have gotten out that a Vatican operative is on the loose in the Four Cities. He won't be that lucky a second time."

**Me**: "And what exactly are _we_ supposed to do?"

**Father Leon**: "Try and keep the body count down."

**Me**: "When we get back, remind me to have a word with her Eminence about her idea of 'field training'..."

* * *

**Abel**: "Leon... I need to talk to you about Johanna..." 

**Father Leon**: "Well, she's sleeping for now... what's on your mind?"

**Abel**: "You were with her in Borghese Park when she did... whatever she did. And you were there again in the Inquisitorial Department's maximum security wing when she took down those agents. Did it seem to hurt Johanna at all? Or affect her in any way?"

**Father Leon**: "Not that I could tell."

**Abel**: "I see..."

**Father Leon**: "Why are you asking?"

**Abel**: "Well, after she was attacked in Borghese Park, the Professor theorized it has something to do with temporal energy."

**Father Leon**: "You mean manipulating time?"

**Abel**: "Yes and no... imagine that she's got a build-up of temporal energy like something building up static electricity. But rather than her just randomly discharging it whenever someone touches her... she can exert some control over when it's released."

**Father Leon**: "So if she were to _lose_ control..."

**Abel**: "She could do serious harm to herself."

**Father Leon**: "Well, I'll leave the scientific explanations up to you and him. Right now, I agree with Cardinal Caterina that the less Johanna does... whatever she does, the safer things are."

**Abel**: "I agree."

**Father Leon**: "Although it would be interesting to see what it could do to a vampire."

**Abel**: "Let's just hope we don't need to find out."

* * *

**Me**: "Oh, cool... I've never been to the Netherlands before... but how exactly are we supposed to find Father Hugue? Unless your plan is to wait for him to start killing vampires, then just follow the trail." 

**Abel**: "Well, for now, our first stop is Our Lady's Cathedral. Her Eminence has already made arrangements for us to stay there while in Antwerp."

**Me**: "Yeah, I can see why her Eminence felt the need to safeguard your virtues."

**Father Leon**: "What?"

**Me**: "Well, it would raise a few eyebrows to have a nun and two priests sharing a room at some hotel somewhere."

**Abel**: "How two people who _flirt_ like you two do were ever let into the AX..."

**Father Leon**: "This from the guy who was in her _bedroom_ tickling her to wake her up?"

**Abel**: "Do I detect a hint of jealousy, Leon?"

**Father Leon**: "Not when I was the one she k- OW!"

**Me**: "Oops, sorry, Father Leon, didn't mean to trip and step on your foot. We were saying something about lunch?"

**Father Leon**: "What? Oh, yeah, lunch sounds good. Train fare is only a step up from prison food."

**Abel**: "But we have very limited _per diem_ funds."

**Me**: "Speak for yourself."

**Father Leon**: "What do you mean?"

**Me**: "Well, Father Abel took a vow of poverty. I didn't."

**Abel**: "Are you saying you got more money for this trip than I did?"

**Me**: "Yep."

**Abel**: "Oh, heavenly Father, _why_ these trials? Why are You testing me?"

**Father Leon**: "Maybe He thinks you need to lose weight."

**Me**: "If I buy you lunch, will you stop complaining?"

**Abel**: "I will _worship_ the ground you walk on."

**Me**: "Promises, promises..."

_To be continued_...


	25. On the Trail of Father Hugue

_Note: I apologize in how long this is taking to get posted, because the computer at home with the Internet connection STILL isn't working! ARGH!_

_So for those of you who wait with bated breath for the next installment, I am not doing this to keep you hanging. It's because we are, as the saying goes, "experiencing technical difficulties."_

_By the way, nice birthday present for myself - Vol 1 of the novels of TB. I was quite pleased that without knowing what happens in the novels, I seem to have still followed canon. Go me._

_Quick update: something else you might enjoy, for those of you who are fans of UR - check out "Through a Glance Darkly" for more on Abel and Johanna._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXV**

**Me**: "Okay, I am officially ready to revolt. We've been traipsing _all_ over Antwerp today chasing after Father Hugue, my feet are _killing_ me, I can't walk nearly as fast as I'm used to, and it's because I'm stuck in a dress and high heels! This is _ridiculous_!"

**Abel**: "What are you talking about?"

**Me**: "You guys get robes and shoes that are much easier to move around in. Where can I get clothes like you two wear? This is stupid that I should be stuck wearing this just because I'm a woman!"

**Abel**: "B-but all the other Sisters wear them!"

**Me**: "No, no, no, no, NO. That is IT. Once we get back to Our Lady's Cathedral, I want robes like you two wear."

**Father Leon**: "You won't look nearly as pretty in those."

**Me**: "You've never seen me wear black. Besides, hiding a holster is impossible in this dress. At least under a traveling cloak, I have a better chance."

**Father Leon**: "Admit it, Johanna, you just like being different."

**Me**: "True."

**Abel**: "Fine, you win. When we get back, we'll see if there's a priest who wears your size. Shoes might be a problem, though-"

**Me**: "I wear a size 10 men's shoe."

**Abel**: "-then again, maybe not."

* * *

**Me**: "Thank God... I feel like I'm dressed properly again. AND I don't have to cover my hair anymore!" 

**Father Leon**: "Welllllll... I take it back, Johanna. I had no idea priests' robes looked that good on a woman!"

**Abel**: "I don't know, I kind of miss being able to see her- um, well, uh, that is..."

**Me**: "_What_ was that?"

**Abel**: "Um, nothing."

**Me**: "Too bad I don't have a pair of bifocals, I could look just like Father Abel!"

**Father Leon**: "You _want_ to look like that goofball? OW, watch where you step, Four-Eyes!"

**Abel**: "Sorry, Leon, guess I didn't realize your foot was on the floor, since it'd appeared to be in your mouth."

**Me**: "Men!"

**Abel**: "At any rate, Sister, while you were changing clothes, we got another lead on where Hugue might be."

**Me**: "Fine, at least with decent boots on, I can still walk. Besides, if we're going to be searching by night, at least it'll be harder for someone else to find me!"

**Father Leon**: "Except that most vampires have excellent night vision."

**Me**: "You really know how to inspire confidence, Father Leon, you know that?"

**Abel**: "You've got your weapons?"

**Me**: "Yep. The semi-auto's in the shoulder holster, and one of the other Fathers was kind enough to provide me with a hip holster for the Peacekeeper. So, who's ready to get this party started?"

* * *

**Me**: "_This_ is what you call a lead?" 

**Abel**: "What a scene... this is almost as bad as when Tres and I found that _Fleurs du Mal_ hideout."

**Me**: "I think I'm going to throw up."

**Father Leon**: "Cops outside have ID'd the victims. Seven vampires, eleven humans."

**Abel**: "On the surface, it looks like the two groups turned on one another and killed each other."

**Me**: "Correction - I _am_ going to throw up. I'll be outside..."

**Father Leon**: "On the surface?"

**Abel**: "According to the coroner's initial report, the actual causes of death were surgical strikes from a bladed weapon designed to take down a vampire, which of course would work just as well on a human."

**Father Leon**: "Hugue. But why would he be trying to cover his tracks like this? It's not like him."

**Abel**: "I don't know, but I guess that's just one more reason we're here."

**Father Leon**: "One other thing - all of the vampires appear to have been part of the vampire mafia that operates in the Four-City Alliance."

**Abel**: "The police are still in the middle of investigating, of course, so we won't be able to do much. Johanna, you okay?"

**Police officer**: "Would you care for a glass of water, Sister?"

**Me**: "Thank you... oh, _shi_-"

**Abel**: "I would never have guessed she'd have that weak of a stomach for this sort of thing."

**Father Leon**: "Either that or we're a lot more inured to it than she is."

**Abel**: "You're probably right."

**Me**: "_Ugh_... my mouth tastes like the bottom of a bird cage... and to top it off, I feel like a prize idiot."

**Father Leon**: "Don't feel bad... I've known nuns and priests who've fainted at sights like these. Feel better now?"

**Me**: "A little."

**Abel**: "Unfortunately, you'd better get used to this. Hugue tends to leave death in his wake."

**Me**: "Wonderful... you were saying about these vampires all being mafia?"

**Father Leon**: "That's right. Not like Hugue to kill humans as well, but if they were working with the vampires, he might bend whatever rules he operates under. Wonder what he was doing going after the local criminal population?"

**Me**: "Hmmmmm... I wonder. Hey, Father Abel, um... just how cooperative do the local police tend to be with us?"

**Abel**: "We _are_ in a city ruled by a vampire, Sister. Not nearly as cooperative as you might be hoping."

**Me**: "Can we at least get a copy of the police report?"

**Father Leon**: "Probably, why?"

**Me**: "Well, you said that it's not like Father Hugue to cover his tracks. But try this one on... Father Hugue knows that the vampires of Antwerp are going to be more prepared for him. But what happens if he's trying to stir up the human collaborators so that the vampires won't be entirely certain where the next threat might come from?"

**Abel**: "'Divide and conquer.' An interesting thought."

**Me**: "Not to mention he's cutting off two heads of the Hydra at the same time. The vampires won't know which humans are trustworthy, and the humans would think twice about doing business with any vampire that might have an assassin after them if the assassin's not just limiting himself to vampires."

**Father Leon**: "Bit ruthless, even for him."

**Me**: "But if he creates _too_ much unrest between the humans and the vampires..."

**Abel**: "Antwerp will become a war zone. We've _got_ to find Hugue, and _fast_."

_To be continued_...


	26. Zwischenzug

_Note: I sincerely apologize for how long it took to get this chapter up - however, the blame rests ENTIRELY on the FF website. As I'm sure a lot of you found out, no one could upload documents to the site, and of course, no word of explanation or apology. Chowderheads._

_Anyway, we're off and running again! (And I made sure to upload what I did get done of the next couple of chapters so I can still post!)_

_The title of this chapter ('Zwischenzug'), by the way, is a reference to a chess move in which a player, instead of playing the expected move (commonly a recapture of a piece that the opponent has just captured) first interpolates another move, posing an immediate threat that the opponent must answer,_ then _plays the expected move. Ideally, the_ zwischenzug _changes the situation to the player's advantage. Appropriate... but not without its risks..._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXVI**

**Me**: "You couldn't sleep either, huh?"

**Abel**: "Oh... I'm sorry if I woke you."

**Me**: "Nah, I'm a light sleeper anyway. And besides, it's an excuse to get up, away from the nightmares."

**Abel**: "Still seeing that vampire hideout?"

**Me**: "Yeah... and the thought that it's going to keep happening..."

**Abel**: "That's why we're here, Sister... to make sure it _doesn't_."

**Me**: "I've been meaning to ask... how exactly are we going to handle the Count? I mean, we can't just stroll in and tell him that a Vatican operative is gunning for him, can we?"

**Abel**: "I don't know. I wish I did. By the way, did you get the copies of the police reports?"

**Me**: "Yes, and been reading them until my eyes cross. I'd thought maybe he'd have cut a wider swathe, but so far he's keeping a low profile... until tonight, that is."

**Abel**: "Well, we'll take a fresh look at it in the morning."

**Me**: "Yeah..."

**Abel**: "You all right?"

**Me**: "Hmm? Oh, I'm fine... I just love churches at night. Oh... that reminds me."

**Abel**: "What are you doing?"

**Me**: "Lighting a candle for my father. I do every time I go into a church."

**Abel**: "I thought you said you weren't Catholic."

**Me**: "I'm not, I'm not even Christian. But whenever I enter a house of worship, no matter what type of faith, if they have this sort of thing, I do it for Dad. I... I guess I should get in the habit of lighting one for my husband, too, since he's-"

**Abel**: "Don't think like that. We _will_ get you home, Johanna. Don't mourn what isn't gone yet."

**Me**: "Right..."

* * *

**Me**: "So what's the plan for today?" 

**Father Leon**: "Hugue's gotta have somewhere to hole up during the day, though. He's still human, he has to eat and sleep sometime."

**Me**: "Does the Vatican have safehouses here in Antwerp?"

**Abel**: "A couple, but primarily Vatican operatives stay at the local churches."

**Me**: "Maybe that's where we should spend today - hit the cathedrals and see if Father Hugue's been staying at one of them. Because given Antwerp's size, if we keep going at this rate, we'll never find Hugue."

**Abel**: "However, we can't split up. You're still not quite up to field personnel standards, and we can't risk you running around here alone."

**Me**: "Yeah, yeah, rub it in. I also think that... well... we may need to warn the Count about Father Hugue."

**Father Leon**: "That may do more harm than good. If we find Hugue, we might be able to stop him. Send the vampires looking for him and he'll send them back in pieces."

**Me**: "Pity there's no way to lure him to us."

**Abel**: "Actually, you might have an idea there."

**Me**: "What?"

**Abel**: "I don't know how Hugue does it, but he always seems to show up when a woman is being attacked by the vampires. But it'd be a terrible gamble."

**Father Leon**: "No, it wouldn't. We can keep an eye on her, just let her look like she's out on her own. If one of them makes a move, and Hugue doesn't show up, either Johanna can take them down on her own, or we step in. Easy enough."

**Me**: "So I guess this is where we find out how good Father Tres' training was..."

**Father Leon**: "You nervous?"

**Me**: "Gee, let me think. Walking alone at night in the middle of a city filled with vampires, with only a week of training, hoping that my knights in shining armor will show up to save me if a vampire attacks me thinking I look like a midnight snack. I'm just BRIMMING with confidence."

**Abel**: "Sarcasm doesn't become you, Johanna."

**Me**: "Neither does fear, but needs must when the devil drives."

**Father Leon**: "We won't let anything happen to you. Even if Hugue doesn't show up, we'll still be there."

**Abel**: "We'll wait until nightfall to try that, then. In the meantime, we have churches to search."

* * *

**Father Leon**: "Well, three cathedrals and five churches, and still no luck." 

**Abel**: "We may have to try the safehouses after all. But first... are you ready, Johanna?"

**Me**: "Yeah... just not happy about having to change back into my habit."

**Father Leon**: "Where's your gun?"

**Me**: "Took a bit of modification, but I was able to rig up a thigh holster for the semi-auto. See? No way to hide the Peacekeeper here, so I'll have to leave it behind. Got my spare ammo in my other pocket... Father Abel, why are you blushing?"

**Abel**: "N-no reason."

**Father Leon**: "Close your mouth, Four-Eyes."

**Me**: "What, you've never seen a woman's legs before?"

**Father Leon**: "Well, you _do_ have nice legs."

**Me**: "They're not THAT nice..."

**Abel**: "If you two are _quite_ done..."

**Me**: "YOU started it!"

**Abel**: "You remember the plan?"

**Me**: "Yeah... you two will escort me to the crime scene from yesterday, I spend a bit of time there, then I start walking back to Our Lady's Cathedral."

**Father Leon**: "And if you get into trouble..."

**Me**: "Start screaming?"

**Abel**: "Johanna-"

**Me**: "I know, I know, shoot first and worry later. But if possible, run like hell for Our Lady's."

**Father Leon**: "And we'll be following you every step of the way. Don't worry."

**Me**: "Then let's go... before my courage gives out."

_To be continued_...


	27. The Best Laid Plans of Priests and Nuns

_Note: It's been more than a little intimidating trying to write Hugue. For a character who doesn't say much, I don't want to screw him up. (Not unlike writing for Kyuzo in SAMURAI 7, actually.) _

_Then there was the light-hearted argument I had with one of my readers via my LJ about Johanna having her own fandom. I highly doubt it'll ever happen, though. (My standard for fandom is when she starts showing up on deviantArt, has her own LJ community, appears in other people's stories, etc.) She's popular, but she's not THAT popular!_

_Which reminds me... should I stop writing this? Yes or No? _

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXVII**

**Me**: "God, I feel self-conscious... and what the _hell_ was I _thinking_ that I let them talk me into wearing a habit again? The dress isn't that bad, but these _shoes_! How am I supposed to run if something happens-"

**Passerby**: "Good evening, Sister."

**Me**: "Good evening."

**Passerby**: "It's a bit late for a lady such as yourself to be wandering out alone, isn't it?"

**Me**: "That depends on who you ask."

**Passerby**: "Allow me to escort you to your destination."

**Me**: "Thanks, but I'll be fine. I'd hate to trouble you."

**Passerby**: "It's no trouble at all... I was on my way to join some friends for a late dinner..."

**Me**: "Wait a sec- hey!"

**Passerby**: "I imagine they'll be pleased when I bring an appetizer."

**Me**: "Sorry, but I'm not available for your dining pleasure... _vampire_."

**Passerby**: "Now, now... let's not make a fuss. All that screaming and shouting is so unpleasant."

**Me**: "I so agree... now back off before things get ugly-"

**Passerby**: "You know, we Methusaleh usually prefer our prey to be alive when we dine, it's much fresher... more invigorating to the palate. But I could just as easily kill you now. After all, one of your kind has been running rampant in Antwerp. What does your holy text say? 'An eye for an eye'?"

**Me**: "What? You're not saying that I was the one that-"

**Passerby**: "No, not at all... I just don't see that sort of stylized execution as being your style, for some reason. But considering what a Vatican operative has been doing to Methusaleh... perhaps an object lesson is in order."

**Me**: "Wait a second, what makes you think I'm a Vatican operative?"

**Passerby**: "Most nuns don't have the spark that I see in your eyes... and most don't move like you do."

**Me**: "No, _wait_-"

* * *

**Father Leon**: "Johanna..." 

**Abel**: "Let's go."

**Vampire #2**: "Sorry, Fathers, but I'm afraid you won't be able to worry about your Sister just yet..."

**Vampire #3**: "Since you have other problems right now."

**Vampire #4**: "Like us."

**Father Leon**: "What the-"

**Abel**: "Oh, no..."

* * *

**Me**: "Come on, Fathers, where _are_ you?" 

**Vampire**: "I'm afraid your companions are otherwise... occupied at the moment."

**Me**: "So _you_ were following _us_?!"

**Vampire**: "Well, we were only expecting to find one of you. But the other two are a bonus. Three birds with one stone... and a meal in the bargain."

**Me**: "Great... I'm going to belt them both when I get out of this."

**Vampire**: "Optimistic, aren't you? And what makes you think you'll be 'getting out of this?'"

**Me**: "Well, the .45 I have aimed at your balls might have something to do with it."

**Vampire**: "Wha-"

**Me**: "I'd hate to ruin my skirt by shooting through it, but I think I can let my fashion vanity go long enough to turn you into a gelding."

**Vampire**: "You wouldn't dare-"

**Me**: "_Watch_ me..."

**Vampire**: "AAAARRGGGGGH!!!"

**Me**: "I thought you enjoyed your prey fighting back."

**Vampire**: "You filthy Terran bitch, how _dare_ you shoot me?"

**Me**: "Take one more step and this time I'll aim for your heart instead of your groin- AAH!"

**Vampire**: "Pity you can only fire that gun if your fingers are actually intact."

**Me**: "My... hand..."

**Vampire**: "No, I don't think I'll kill you... but I think I might be late for my engagement."

**Me**: "Let... let go... please... AAAGGH!"

**Vampire**: "Maybe I'll save some of you for my friends... assuming they aren't full once they're done with _your_ friends."

* * *

**Father Leon**: "Johanna!" 

**Vampire #5**: "Now, now, don't you know that it's rude to engage on a private discussion?"

**Vampire #6**: "Especially when you have more pressing concerns?"

**Father Leon**: "Too bad, but we don't have time to waste with you."

**Vampire #6**: "Careful, Father... or we'll tell our friend to tear her apart right now. The longer you stay quiet, the longer she lives."

**Abel**: "Get out of our way."

**Vampire #4**: "I think not, Father. You see, we've let you Vatican dogs run off the leash in the city long enough."

**Vampire #2**: "And now it's time to put you down."

**Father Leon**: "And you think we're just going to stand here and let you kill us?"

**Vampire #3**: "Well, it's just not as... satisfying to feed off males. They lack a certain... appeal."

**Vampire #5**: "But don't worry... the good Sister will make for some useful entertainment before the main course."

**Abel**: "Oh, God... Johanna..."

* * *

**Vampire**: "Has anyone ever told you that your face is quite lovely when contorted by pain?" 

**Me**: "P-please... let g-go..."

**Vampire**: "Now then... business before pleasure, I'm afraid. What can you tell me about the Vatican assassin?" 

**Me**: "H-his name's Hugue... Father Hugue... that's all I know..."

**Vampire**: "Is that so? Do you know anything about him?"

**Me**: "N-nothing..."

**Vampire**: "Come now, do you _really_ expect me to believe that?"

**Me**: "I-it's the t-truth..."

**Vampire**: "And why is he in Antwerp?"

**Me**: "I..."

**Vampire**: "Don't make me repeat myself, Sister."

**Me**: "I don't... know w-where he is... I swear..."

**Vampire**: "That's _not_ what I asked... I asked _why_ he was here?"

**Me**: "I don't know..."

**Vampire**: "I might let you keep this hand intact if you tell me."

**Me**: "I... AAGH!"

**Vampire**: "Now, think very hard, Sister. Think as though your life depended on the answer. Where can I find this Vatican assassin?"

**Me**: "He's... he's..."

**Hugue**: "Right behind you."

_To be continued_...


	28. A Dark and Stormy Knight

_Note: Yes, Hugue has finally made his long-awaited appearance! However, it is a little bit difficult to really convey the whole slicing-and-dicing thing in straight dialogue, so I will do my humble best. Sorry to them's that are easily confused._

_One thing I do very much have in common with Johanna is what in gaming terms is referred to as the Psychological Limitation: 'Must Mouth Off to Vastly More Powerful Opponent.' (My Champions character, Midnight, was infamous for this trait, but that's another story.)_

_**Update**: Thanks to some (well-deserved) criticism from one of the TrinityBlood LJ community members, this chapter has been rewritten to make it a bit in-character._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXVIII**

**Vampire**: "Who the-"

**Me**: "Please... help me-"

**Vampire**: "SHUT UP!"

**Me**: "Oww! Cowardly _bastard_... hitting a... woman..."

**Hugue**: "Let her go. If you don't, you die."

**Vampire**: "Just for that, I'll kill her, _then_ you."

**Me**: "Oh, God, nooooo-"

**Hugue**: "Die, then."

**Vampire**: "You bast-"

**Me**: "AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!"

**Vampire**: "-tard... w-what... h-_how_..."

**Hugue**: "You cannot kill me, vampire. Nor will you kill her."

**Me**: "You... he... how the _hell_ did you DO that?! All I did was _blink_ and he was in two! I've NEVER seen sword skills like THAT!"

**Hugue**: "You shouldn't take such risks, Sister."

**Me**: "A fine thing, coming from you. Father Hugue de Watteau, I presume. If you are, thank God, we've been looking all over for you. If you're not, thank you anyway for saving me. But either way, if you don't mind, please don't go anywhere. I'll be right back."

**Hugue**: "Where are you going?"

**Me**: "I have to go save Father Abel and Father Leon. Unless you feel like helping, that is- Owwwwwwwwww..."

**Hugue**: "What?"

**Me**: "I think he broke my hand, the bastard."

**Hugue**: "How do you plan to help if your right hand is injured?"

**Me**: "I still have my left."

* * *

**Hugue**: "What makes you think you need to save them?" 

**Me**: "Because they were supposed to step in and save me if anything like that happened. Given that they didn't, and they're _still_ not showing themselves, I'm guessing they're in trouble."

**Hugue**: "Fine. Stay here."

**Me**: "The hell with that. I'm in pain, I'm scared half out of my mind, and I'm so pissed off I can hardly see straight. So sorry, but after what that creep did to me, I'm not letting you have all the fun."

* * *

**Vampire #5**: "Our friend should just now be finishing up with the good Sister-" 

**Me**: "FATHERS!"

**Vampire #5**: "What?!"

**Abel**: "Johanna, what are you-"

**Vampire #5**: "But how- ARGH!"

**Me**: "GET AWAY FROM THEM!"

**Vampire #4**: "What the- AGH!"

**Hugue**: "One..."

**Father Leon**: "Hey, Hugue! Nice timing!"

**Vampire #2**: "Where- AAGH!"

**Hugue**: "Two..."

**Vampire #3**: "But how- AAGH!"

**Hugue**: "Three..."

**Vampire #6**: "Get them- AGH!"

**Hugue**: "Four..."

**Father Leon**: "Glad to see you were able to join the party, Hugue."

**Vampire #5**: "You Vatican _scum_!"

**Me**: "WHAT?!"

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, he's behind you!"

**Me**: "OH _SHI_-"

**Father Leon**: "SHOOT!"

**Vampire #5**: "I'll kill you, you little-"

**Me**: "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!"

**Abel**: "Johanna, stop!"

**Me**: "Oh, God..."

**Abel**: "He's dead."

**Father Leon**: "Considering she emptied the entire magazine into him..."

* * *

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, you okay?" 

**Me**: "Y-yeah... but I had no idea head shots sounded that _gross_..."

**Father Leon**: "Anti-vampire rounds do that..."

**Abel**: "Johanna, thank God you're all right!"

**Me**: "Thank Father Hugue for that... are _you_ all right?"

**Abel**: "We're fine... more worried about you. We heard you screaming and saw that vampire doing something to your hand-"

**Me**: "We can worry about that later. In the meantime, what happened?"

**Father Leon**: "We were about to step in and help you when these five came out of nowhere. They were working with the one that came after you."

**Me**: "That makes sense, based on what he was blathering about before Father Hugue stepped in. Owwwwww... urgh."

**Abel**: "Johanna, are you sure you're all right? You look as white as a ghost..."

**Me**: "I'll be fine... Um, excuse the pun, but can one of you give me a hand? I want to see if any of them have ID of some kind."

**Father Leon**: "Sure..."

**Me**: "Don't take their wallets or anything, I just want to know who they are. That way I can get some more research done on how _they_ knew who _we_ are."

**Abel**: "In the meantime, I'm glad to see that Father Tres' training did in fact pay off. Not bad, Johanna. I didn't know you were left-handed."

**Me**: "I'm not... Thirty years of playing the piano helps with ambidexterity. So I had Father Tres teach me to shoot with either hand. But did you see Father Hugue take those vampires apart? He had that sword out faster than I could even track!"

**Father Leon**: "For that matter, I'm surprised Hugue didn't just jump right in at first."

**Me**: "Oh, he wanted to, but he was enough of a gentleman to let me have first shot, as it were."

**Abel**: "Very funny, Johanna."

**Hugue**: "Who exactly are you?"

**Me**: "Sister Johanna Sinclair, lately of Rome, before that, Phoenix, circa AD 2007. Pleasure to meet you."

**Abel**: "It's a long story, Hugue."

**Me**: "Nice to see that the trend continues of the AX priests being totally hot. Tall, blond, gorgeous, and hell itself with a sword. Yeah, _just_ my luck that I meet you AFTER I got married. Right now, though, I vote the four of us get the hell out of here. However, Fathers, if you don't mind, one of you will have to carry me, because I'm going to faint now."

**Father Leon**: "Johanna!"

**Abel**: "Is she all right?"

**Father Leon**: "Looks like that vampire messed her right hand up pretty good, but thankfully most of this blood doesn't seem to be hers. I wonder why she didn't use her power on that vampire when he attacked her..."

**Hugue**: "Her power?"

**Abel**: "We'll fill you in. In the meantime, we need to get back to Our Lady's Cathedral. There's a _lot_ you need to know."

_To be continued_...


	29. I am Become Death

_Note: I was greatly relieved that people didn't jump down my throat about how the last chapter played out. (I stress about the weirdest things.) _

_When I'd written "Through a Glance Darkly" (a companion piece to "Unexpected Results", also up on FF), people asked me if I had, in fact, ever killed anyone (deliberately or otherwise). The answer is no. However, I admit that three times in my life, I very nearly did, and I was so horrified that I never forgot it. __Ironic that a week later, Chapter Twenty-Eight was written, where Johanna lets her anger and terror get the better of her in a bad situation. Now, "Glance" has a whole new resonance for me._

_Update: Given that FF_ still _hasn't fixed the notification system, for those who want to be notified when the next chapters go up, send an email to mtravis AT andthegreatestofthese DOT com. This will be used strictly to notify readers of updates to "Unexpected Results."_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXIX**

**Abel**: "I can carry her, Leon."

**Father Leon**: "What, you afraid I'm going to drop her?"

**Abel**: "No, it's not that..."

**Father Leon**: "And you're not exactly a model of strength yourself."

**Abel**: "Well... maybe not. But if Johanna's injured, holding her in a fireman's carry might not be the best thing right now."

**Hugue**: "Her only injury is her hand. The blood is from that vampire."

**Abel**: "Oh..."

**Father Leon**: "Don't mind him, Hugue, Four-Eyes is just jealous."

**Abel**: "Don't be ridiculous..."

* * *

**Hugue**: "So, that comment of hers earlier was true..." 

**Father Leon**: "Yeah. The Professor was experimenting with a vampire biocontainment unit, and the next thing we knew, she was inside of it. Then he blew up his office-"

**Hugue**: "Again?"

**Abel**: "Mm-hmm. So her Eminence forbade him to work on it. As it happens, Johanna has strong technical skills with Lost Technology, so Caterina brought her into the AX."

**Hugue**: "What about this power Leon mentioned?"

**Abel**: "We're still trying to figure it out, but Johanna has the ability to disrupt temporal energy. We first became aware of it when she and Leon were mugged in Borghese Park not too long ago. The Professor thinks it has to do with her being pulled through time. She not only knocked the would-be mugger unconscious with it, but she also took down several Inquisitorial agents when they arrested her for being a heretic."

**Hugue**: "So Francesco DID find out..."

**Father Leon**: "Yes and no. He doesn't know about her being from the past, though. However, she escaped from the Inquisition with a little help from us, and then she, Abel, and me were sent here."

**Hugue**: "And why is that?"

**Father Leon**: "I'll let Four-Eyes explain that one to you. I'm going to go check on Johanna."

* * *

**Me**: "_I am become Death... the destroyer of worlds..._" 

**Father Leon**: "Johanna?"

**Me**: "Over here..."

**Father Leon**: "I just came to check on you, see if you needed anything. Is your hand all right?"

**Me**: "Yes... it's been splinted, and Father Abel says it should heal in a couple of weeks."

**Father Leon**: "Would you rather be alone?"

**Me**: "No... please stay. I... I don't want to be alone right now."

**Father Leon**: "What's wrong?"

**Me**: "I can't stop thinking... about earlier-"

**Father Leon**: "Don't dwell on it, Johanna."

**Me**: "All I could think was... that they were going to hurt you and Father Abel. I didn't care if he hurt me... I didn't even care if he killed me, but I... I _couldn't_ let him hurt you. Just thinking about it hurt more than him crushing my hand. It went beyond wanting to shoot him. I wanted to tear him apart, I wanted _him_ to be afraid. And I... I killed him. Without even _thinking_ about what I was doing."

**Father Leon**: "Don't... don't blame yourself for doing what had to be done."

**Me**: "But... I _wanted_ to kill him. Don't you understand?! It didn't _matter_ that he was a living, thinking being... it didn't _matter_ that I could have just wounded him. I... wanted... him... dead!"

**Father Leon**: "Listen to me-"

**Me**: "What... what's _wrong_ with me, Father? How could I have done-?"

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, stop it-"

**Me**: "WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!"

**Father Leon**: "NOTHING is wrong with you!"

**Me**: "But I _wanted_ to hurt him, to _kill_ him..."

**Father Leon**: "Get used to it, because death is part of AX life - we see it, we deal it, and we do what we can to go on. Those bastards had every intention of killing us, and what they'd planned for you was even worse. You're _human_, Johanna - and humans want revenge when someone we care about gets hurt or is threatened."

**Me**: "Then _why_?!"

**Father Leon**: "What are you talking about?"

**Me**: "Why didn't you?! WHY DID YOU LET HIM HURT ME?! WHY?! _W-WHY_?!"

**Father Leon**: "Believe me... standing there and doing nothing was one of the hardest things I've had to do. When that bastard was hurting you, Abel and I wanted nothing more than to leap in there and save you."

**Me**: "THEN W-WHY DIDN'T YOU S-STOP HIM?!

**Father Leon**: "Because we... were afraid they'd kill you."

**Me**: "You and F-Father Abel could have _easily_ d-dealt with them - I know w-what you're c-capable of."

**Father Leon**: "Do you think for one moment that either of us wanted you to get hurt because of our actions?"

**Me**: "I-it hurt... s-so _much_... and I t-thought that you t-two d-d-didn't even c-_care_ if I g-got hurt... and t-that was even w-worse... t-than the pain..."

**Father Leon**: "No, Johanna, that's _not_ true. We care."

**Me**: "I-I'm s-s-scared, F-Father... I'm s-so s-scared..."

**Father Leon**: "Let it out, Johanna... don't try to hold it back... just let it go."

* * *

**Father Leon**: "God, I need a drink. Either of you want one?" 

**Hugue**: "Sure."

**Abel**: "That bad, huh?"

**Father Leon**: "Worse."

**Abel**: "What're you having?"

**Father Leon**: "Wine... you want some?"

**Abel**: "Why not?"

**Father Leon**: "Here's to surviving yet again..."

**Abel**: "How is she? We heard shouting-"

**Father Leon**: "She's asleep now... but God, sometimes I really hate this job."

**Hugue**: "What happened?"

**Father Leon**: "It all finally caught up to her - the attack, and then those vampires... it was tearing her apart."

**Hugue**: "She all right?"

**Father Leon**: "She'll be fine... eventually. But... she cried in my arms... Can you believe it? She killed a vampire to save our lives after they'd threatened us and her... and she still cried for them."

**Abel**: "Leon..."

**Father Leon**: "What a screwed-up world we live in, when the only way to survive is by destroying any sense of compassion or pity. Makes you wonder, doesn't it..."

**Abel**: "It makes me think I need another drink."

_To be continued_...


	30. The Lesser of Two Evils

_Note: I appreciate your patience, those of you who have been wondering if this story was going to continue. I did a lot of thinking this past weekend, and have decided that yeah, the story will go on, and it will go on as it has been. While I know a lot of folks enjoyed the lighthearted way it started, like TRINITY BLOOD itself, just when you think you've got it figured out, it changes._

_(Incidentally, for those who didn't know, Chapters 28 ("A Dark and Stormy Knight") and 29 ("I am Become Death") were slightly rewritten to make them better, so before reading THIS chapter, I recommend going back and re-reading those two, THEN reading Chapter 30.)_

_So thanks for sticking around... the misadventures of Sister Johanna Sinclair, the time-bending, trouble-making, techie pagan nun, will continue..._

_Update: Given that FF_ still _hasn't fixed the notification system, for those who want to be notified when the next chapters go up, send an email to mtravis AT andthegreatestofthese DOT com. This will be used strictly to notify readers of updates to "Unexpected Results."_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXX**

**Abel**: "Please understand, Hugue. While her Eminence does agree that justice must prevail for those who died at the church in Amsterdam, your vengeance must _not_ be allowed to overwhelm your sense of judgment and your duty to the AX."

**Hugue**: "Is that so?"

**Abel**: "Yes, it is. Lady Caterina has asked us to come to Antwerp to convey to you personally her orders that you return to Rome."

**Hugue**: "If I don't?"

**Abel**: "Then she will dispatch Gunslinger. Please, Hugue, for all our sakes, heed her Eminence's request."

**Hugue**: "I can't."

**Father Leon**: "Why not? What's so damned important here that you're willing to risk your life, your freedom, and your responsibility to the AX?"

**Abel**: "Please tell me this is not about some misguided sense of revenge..."

**Hugue**: "No. It's... more than that now."

**Father Leon**: "What do you mean?"

**Hugue**: "There's... this..."

**Father Leon**: "A datacube? What's on it?"

**Hugue**: "See for yourself."

**Abel**: "I'll be right back... I want Johanna to see this..."

**Hugue**: "Why?"

**Abel**: "Call it a hunch."

* * *

**Abel**: "Johanna? Are you awake?" 

**Me**: "Yeah... I couldn't really sleep all that well. What's going on?"

**Abel**: "Father Hugue has something I want you to take a look at. How well can you tell if an electronic record has been forged or modified?"

**Me**: "Depends on what someone did to it. I can look, but I'm not infallible."

**Abel**: "Good enough. Come with me."

**

* * *

Me**: "Okay, let's take a look... but first, I want to disconnect this computer from anything else that might be on the same network." 

**Father Leon**: "Why?"

**Me**: "In case someone believes in nasty surprises... okay, now, let's see..."

**Abel**: "What are you doing?"

**Me**: "Writing down the dates of when the files were created, according to this thing. Now, let's compare those to any dates referenced in the files... they seem to match up, so nothing there... check last modified dates... those look all right... no, I'm guessing this thing is legit. At least as far as file creation goes. The information of course is open to interpretation, but that's not my problem."

**Abel**: "Wait, go back up a screen. What is that?"

**Me**: "They look like financial transactions. See? Accounts received, accounts paid, dates, so on and so forth."

**Father Leon**: "They're all based around Amsterdam. What'd you do, Hugue, go through Vandenburg's files?"

**Hugue**: "You could say that."

**Me**: "Wait a minute... Father Hugue, you said you found this in Count Vandenburg's files?"

**Hugue**: "Yes."

**Me**: "That can't be right..."

**Abel**: "Why not?"

**Me**: "Because the name associated with the accounts on here isn't Vandenburg's."

**Father Leon**: "Well, then, whose name _is_ it?"

**Me**: "Memling's..."

* * *

**Abel**: "So... this is why Memling took out the church in Amsterdam... he was funneling money through select businesses in Amsterdam even though the four Counts are supposed to remain strictly within their own provinces. Presumably Karel Vandenburg found out, or else was about to, and so Memling launched a subtle but pre-emptive strike against him, and using the Vatican to do his dirty work." 

**Father Leon**: "Which leaves a power vacuum in Amsterdam that the other three Counts now have to fill, if they want to maintain any sense of order."

**Me**: "I'd put good money that Memling is already prepared to step into a dead man's boots, if you'll forgive the expression. But the _really_ big question is, will he stop with just Amsterdam?"

**Father Leon**: "You think he'll go after the other two Counts?"

**Me**: "Think of it this way... from my lessons, I know that the primary bastion of vampire strength is the Empire in the East. But the Four-City Alliance may well be the largest vampire bloc outside the Empire.

**Abel**: "Correct. The only reason it's not been a threat is because four people were controlling it."

**Father Leon**: "But you make it so that all four cities fall under one person's control, and that power bloc has just become a lot more powerful."

**Abel**: "We'll need more solid proof, though."

**Me**: "That'll be a trick- oh, hell..."

**Father Leon**: "What?"

**Me**: "I just had another thought, and I'm not sure which one disturbs me more..."

**Hugue**: "Which is?"

**Me**: "Well, let's assume that Memling is going to try and take down the remaining Counts, and bring the Four-City Alliance completely under his control. We'll then be dealing with someone who has no regard for the Church, unlike the others who at least knew well enough to leave the Vatican alone. Meaning we potentially have a war on our hands that the Empire might or might not join in, given that the Alliance is not part of the Empire."

**Abel**: "A bad scenario, but what's your second thought?"

**Me**: "What would happen if all _four_ Counts were assassinated?"

**Father Leon**: "The Four-City Alliance would most likely implode, all four cities falling into chaos until someone emerges to take control."

**Me**: "Smack in the middle of at least four countries who would not be at all happy to have _that_ happen - Albion, the Franc Kingdom, Germanicus, and the Vatican."

**Abel**: "I don't like the way you think at all, Johanna..."

**Hugue**: "To say the least..."

**Me**: "But of the two possibilities, it may be the least likely. I mean, who in their right minds would benefit from that kind of anarchy? Or even _want_ to? A good part of western Europe would go up in flames..."

**Abel**: "Oh, _God_..."

**Me**: "What?"

**Abel**: "_Igne natura renovatur integra_..."

_To be continued_...


	31. Something Rotten in the State of Antwerp

_Note: Sorry for the delay - unexpected double whammy from hubby mine. (First, the outbreak of his anaphylaxis that we THOUGHT we had under control; second, his CPAP mask broke, so neither of us has gotten any real sleep for five nights straight. I am TIRED.)_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXI**

**Me**: "What was that? Sounded like Latin for... '_In flames, the world shall be reborn anew_,' or something to that effect, if my Latin serves me correctly."

**Abel**: "It does."

**Me**: "So what's got you so spooked?"

**Leon**: "It means that this goes beyond just vampire in-fighting; the Rosencreutz Order is involved in this whole mess. And this is _just_ the sort of psychopathic chaos they'd enjoy."

**Me**: "The Rose and Cross... and judging by the look on your faces, I'm guessing that this is _not_ a good thing."

**Abel**: "They were the ones behind the Vatican and the Empire nearly going to war not too long ago, when they manipulated the Methusaleh who ruled Ishtvan, the late Count Gyula, and Sister Esther into nearly starting a war by accident."

**Me**: "Esther?! How in the world did they manage that-"

**Leon**: "It's a long story. But luckily for us, Father Four-Eyes here was able to stop things from getting out of hand. But the guy who was really pulling the strings got away, and we have no idea where he is."

**Abel**: "This is _all_ we need."

**Hugue**: "So what now?"

**Me**: "Hmmm... what was his name?"

**Leon**: "Whose?"

**Me**: "The guy who was manipulating things in Ishtvan."

**Abel**: "Dietrich von Lohengrin."

**Me**: "Wonder if I can find anything on him..."

**Leon**: "No offense to your computer skills, Johanna, but the Vatican's been looking for him ever since Esther made her report. Nothing."

**Abel**: "And above all, we do NOT need the Rosencreutz learning about _you_, Johanna."

**Me**: "All right, all right, I'll try and behave, at least as much as I ever do. But what do we do now? I mean, we found Father Hugue. But that was only part of our mission. What do we do about the rest?"

**Abel**: "That hasn't changed. Our job is to stop the killing. Hugue, I understand your feelings, but we need your help, or thousands will die. Will you help us?"

**Hugue**: "Do I have a choice?"

**Me**: "Sure, you could leave, we could report you, and her Eminence could sic Father Tres on you. It'd be interesting to watch, but not really all that productive, in the grand scheme of things. Or, you could leave, the vampires could catch you, and we could all end up in blood up to our as-"

**Abel**: "Language..."

**Me**: "Um, yeah. So, just skip all the lone wolf, brooding, vengeful stuff, say that you'll stick around and help us, and let's pretend to get some real work done here, shall we?"

**Hugue**: "Is she always this pushy?"

**Leon**: "You have _no_ idea."

**Me**: "Excuse me, I am NOT pushy..."

* * *

**Sister Kate**: "Your Eminence, we have a communication coming through from Father Nightroad." 

**Caterina**: "From Abel? Put him through."

**Abel**: "_Lady Caterina_?"

**Caterina**: "This had better be important, Abel, if you're calling from Antwerp."

**Abel**: "_I believe it is. Two matters have surfaced that I feel you should know about. First, our investigation has uncovered the possibility that the Rosencreutz Order is behind the events both in Amsterdam and here in Antwerp_."

**Caterina**: "What?!"

**Abel**: "_While in Amsterdam, Hugue discovered a datacube that, according to Johanna, contains records of several financial transactions that Memling, Count of Antwerp, was involved with in Amsterdam. It's possible that he manipulated the Vatican into killing Karel Vandenburg so that he could take over Amsterdam, but it's also possible that the Rosencreutz is trying to destabilize the entire Four-City Alliance. We're investigating both possibilities, but we do not have definitive proof yet for one scenario over the other_."

**Caterina**: "I understand. Proceed with caution in your investigations, Father Nightroad. What is the second matter?"

**Abel**: "_We were attacked while searching for Father Hugue. We found Hugue, but Johanna has been injured_."

**Caterina**: "Is she all right?"

**Abel**: "_Thankfully, it's not serious. However... she lost control in the process_."

**Caterina**: "She didn't use her power in the middle of Antwerp, did she?!"

**Abel**: "_No, no, not like that. She... well, for lack of a better word, she panicked_."

**Caterina**: "What exactly are you saying, Abel?"

**Abel**: "_Johanna is just not ready for this sort of thing. I would strongly urge you to consider recalling her to Rome_."

**Caterina**: "We need all the agents we can get, Abel, and she has to learn some time."

**Abel**: "_Even if it breaks her_?"

**Caterina**: "Even then."

**Abel**: "_This could cause permanent psychological damage to her, my lady_."

**Caterina**: "I'm all too aware of that. But have you forgotten that the Inquisition wants to execute her?"

**Abel**: "_No_-"

**Caterina**: "My answer is final, Father Nightroad. Sister Johanna Sinclair will remain with you and Leon in Antwerp and carry out her duties as assigned. Caterina out."

**Sister Kate**: "Orders, your Eminence?"

**Caterina**: "Inform the Professor that I want the upgrades to the _Iron Maiden_ finished as soon as possible. I want you and Father Wordsworth in Antwerp by the end of this week. No later."

**Sister Kate**: "And if they're not?"

**Caterina**: "Then you can tell the Professor I'll make _certain_ he has a _full_ load of classes for the next six months."

**Sister Kate**: "Faced with that, he'll probably have the upgrades done by the end of the day..."

* * *

**Leon**: "God, another murder scene. And I thought the _last_ one was bad." 

**Abel**: "Johanna, you might want to stay outside."

**Me**: "How am I supposed to learn to deal with this if you try and shelter me?"

**Abel**: "_You_ were the one throwing up outside the last time we had to investigate a scene like this."

**Me**: "Well, pardon _me_ for existing."

**Hugue**: "Eight dead. Two vampires, six humans."

**Me**: "They part of the criminal element, too?"

**Abel**: "Seems so... actually, here's something you might be able to make use of, Johanna.

**Me**: "What have you got?"

**Leon**: "Bunch of documentation... looks like they were in the middle of a business deal that went bad."

**Me**: "Question is, a deal for what... but on the bright side, at least we know that Father Hugue wasn't behind this one... or _were_ you?"

**Hugue**: "No, I wasn't."

**Me**: "Good."

**Abel**: "Same MO as last time, however... someone is trying to make it look as though the Vatican were behind it."

**Me**: "Three guesses as to whom, and the first two don't count."

_To be continued_...


	32. Reversal of Fortunes

_Note: It still never ceases to amaze me how many people are getting into this story. Which reminds me..._

_For the fans, there are two nifty little surprises for you on my LiveJournal. I recommend visiting the entry for April 25th, 2007, and the second entry for April 30th, 2007. (My LJ can be found via my profile here on the FF site.)_

_Also, UR inspired another piece of writing that you can find here on FF, called "All Alone in the Night." Enjoy..._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXII**

**Father Leon**: "So, what do you make of it?"

**Johanna**: "Well, computer's still chewing on that stuff we picked up at the last crime scene, so in the meantime, I'm cross-referencing the names of those six vampires that jumped us the other night."

**Abel**: "That's going to take a while, though, isn't it?"

**Johanna**: "Yeah... computers these days might be faster, but there's still an awful lot of information to slog through. Oh... _and_ I've also got it cross-checking this stuff against that datacube that Father Hugue brought back with him."

**Father Leon**: "How long are we looking at?"

**Johanna**: "Long enough to go grab dinner, at least... I'm probably going to be up half the night sifting through this stuff, but I'll be _damned_ if I'm going to do it on an empty stomach."

**Abel**: "Dinner sounds wonderful... but do you really think it wise to go traipsing around Antwerp?"

**Johanna**: "We've been traipsing around Antwerp now for a couple of days, Father... we already know we can take care of ourselves... and besides, I'm going to be cooped up here enough as it is."

**Abel**: "I take your point. Very well, then."

**Johanna**: "Hey, Father Hugue, gonna come with us?"

Hugue: "No. Thank you."

**Johanna**: "You sure? Okay, suit yourself. Just behave yourself while we're gone, all right? Leon, you coming with?"

**Father Leon**: "Of course... can't let you two have _all_ the fun."

**Johanna**: "Great, give me about five minutes to finish up here and we'll head on out."

* * *

**Abel**: "So where should we go?" 

**Johanna**: "I'm open for just about anything at this point, I am absolutely starving."

**Father Leon**: "We can always walk until we find someplace that looks good."

**Abel**: "Fine by me... after all, Johanna's buying."

**Johanna**: "_Excuse_ me?"

**Abel**: "Well, aren't you? After all, you do have more money than we do."

**Johanna**: "First I bought you lunch the other day, now I'm buying you dinner... if I buy you flowers too, what do I get out of it?"

**Abel**: "Um..."

**Johanna**: "Never mind, don't answer that."

**Abel**: "Well, it's not like we could consider this a date..."

**Johanna**: "Yeah, what with you being a priest, me being a nun, me being married..."

**Abel**: "Actually, I was going to say because Leon insisted on coming along."

**Father Leon**: "Say _what_?!"

**Johanna**: "Well, at least I'm on the arms of two of the cutest guys in town..."

**Father Leon**: "I am _not_ CUTE!"

* * *

**Abel**: "Aaaaaaah, that was _good_. Thank you for dinner, Sister!" 

**Father Leon**: "Considering how much you ate, you probably owe her your next two monthly stipends."

**Johanna**: "So if he was going to worship the ground I walked on just because I bought him lunch the other day... considering I bought him dinner tonight, I wonder what I could ask for..."

**Abel**: "I don't think I've ever seen that kind of smile on your face before, Johanna... should I be worried?"

**Johanna**: "Well, it's getting late, we should get back to Our Lady's Cathedral. The data analysis should be just about done, if we're lucky, and we can try and get a break on this whole mess."

**Father Leon**: "Sounds like a plan- what the-"

**Johanna**: "They sound like church bells... but it's nowhere near a time for Mass..."

**Abel**: "That's not a call to Mass... quick, get out of the way!"

**Johanna**: "YOU CRAZY IDIOT, WHY DON'T YOU LOOK WHERE YOU'RE GOING?!"

**Father Leon**: "That was a fire wagon..."

**Johanna**: "Wow, whatever's on fire, you can see the light from here! Must be one wicked blaze!"

**Abel**: "Whoever it is, they may need help..."

**Johanna**: "Good idea..."

**Father Leon**: "Wait a minute... is the smoke coming from-"

**Johanna**: "Oh, HELL! The building on fire is Our Lady's Cathedral!"

**Father Leon**: "We have to hurry, there are over twenty people assigned to that church!"

* * *

**Abel**: "Leon, come with me, we have to make sure no one is still inside!" 

**Johanna**: "You're _not_ leaving me behind, I'm coming with you!"

**Father Leon**: "You're not strong enough to carry someone!"

**Johanna**: "No, but I can still help you search!"

**Abel**: "We don't have time to argue! Johanna, stay here and help anyone who tries to get out! That's an order!"

**Johanna**: "Yes, Father... and _be careful_, both of you..."

**Fire brigade leader**: "Hold it!"

**Abel**: "Please, you _have_ to let us through! There are men and women in that church!"

**Fire brigade leader**: "We can't allow you to pass... the whole building is about to come down!"

**Johanna**: "Please, you have to let them through, if there's even the _slightest_ chance that someone's inside-"

**Fire brigade leader**: "I'm sorry, Fa-... I beg your pardon... Sister. But there's no way anyone could survive that inferno."

**Johanna**: "No... oh, God... the Sisters... the priests... Father Hugue..."

**Firefighter**: "Everyone get back, it's coming down!"

**Johanna**: "... _and the inferno gains a terribly beautiful voice / growling and snapping, howling and shrieking / as the angels of the last judgment cry out, "unfair..."'_"

**Father Leon**: "It's all right, Johanna... cry for them. No one should pass without having tears shed for them."

**Abel**: "'Grant unto them eternal rest, dear Lord, and let Your light shine eternally upon them. May the souls of the faithful departed, in Your mercy, rest in peace.'"

**Father Leon, Johanna**: "Amen..."

**

* * *

Father Leon**: "Damn it... there were twenty nuns and priests in there!" 

**Abel**: "Not to mention _all_ of our information... this was no accident. This was deliberate sabotage, and maybe an attempt at murder."

**Johanna**: "Well, then, it's good to know we were on the right track."

**Father Leon**: "For all the good that it does us now, since all of our data just went up in flames!"

**Johanna**: "No, it didn't..."

**Abel**: "What is that?"

**Father Leon**: "It's a datacube, stupid... wait a sec-"

**Johanna**: "You didn't think I would be so foolish as to leave the _only_ copy of our work in one place where anyone could get at it, did you?"

**Abel**: "Johanna, I could _kiss_ you..."

**Johanna**: "As if..."

_To be continued_...

* * *

_Endnote: The lines that Johanna quotes in front of Our Lady's Cathedral are from a poem of mine called "Portrait of an Arsonist as a Young Woman," written in 1995 during my junior year of college._


	33. Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

_Note: Glad to see how many people are enjoying the turn things have taken! Hopefully the next couple of chapters will go up a bit more quickly, since I have a few of them written already (or mostly written). Soon this story arc will be coming to a head, and things REALLY get intense... heh heh heh._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXIII**

**Johanna**: "That's it! That is _it!_ The gloves _officially_ come off, and when I find out who did this, I am going to _personally_ rip their spines out through their mouths!"

**Abel**: "What good will taking a life do?"

**Johanna**: "It's _damned_ well going to stop whoever did this from doing it again!"

**Abel**: "Sister, revenge won't bring back the ones that have been lost."

**Johanna**: "Maybe not... but it might help them rest easier."

**Abel**: "You don't really believe that."

**Father Leon**: "Leave her alone, Abel. She's angry, we all are. We'll deal with that issue later. The big question is, what do we do _now_?"

**Abel**: "Well, we should avoid the other churches to keep them from becoming targets. We'll need to find some place else to stay."

**Johanna**: "Fine... we'll get a room somewhere and I'll get to work on this. Thankfully we're not totally back to square one, but we're going to have to be a lot more careful from here on out."

* * *

**Abel**: "Oh, dear..." 

**Father Leon**: "What?"

**Abel**: "Well, in our current situation, booking separate rooms seemed to be courting risk, so I'd arranged for one room with sleeping arrangements for three... but... um..."

**Johanna**: "Ah, I see the problem..."

**Abel**: "It's _not_ funny, Johanna, why are you laughing?"

**Johanna**: "Because it _is_ funny... either two people get cozy, or someone sleeps on the floor. And let me guess... you both are going to insist on the whole chivalrous thing of offering me one of the beds."

**Father Leon**: "Which means one of us sleeps on the floor. Big deal... compared to prison, this is paradise."

**Abel**: "But it's going to be so _uncomfortable_, sleeping on the floor..."

**Father Leon**: "Stop being such a wimp, Four-Eyes. It's not like we'll be here forever."

**Johanna**: "I don't see what the big deal is, why not just take turns sleeping next to me? I _am_ capable of keeping my hands to myself, you know."

**Abel**: "Wha-_AAT_?! W-we can't do that, we're _priests_!"

**Johanna**: "Oh, for the love of God, Father Abel, I'm not propositioning the two of you, it's just so we can try and make the best of a lousy situation!"

**Abel**: "B-but... but..."

**Johanna**: "If you don't stop blushing, you're going to pass out from the blood rushing to your head. Sit down before you fall over or something."

**Father Leon**: "We'll try it for two nights. If it's a problem, one of us will move to the floor. End of discussion. So who sleeps with Johanna tonight?"

**Johanna**: "You could always play rock-paper-scissors to decide. In the meantime, I'm going to get cracking on this stuff."

* * *

**Father Leon**: "Well, I brought back dinner. Who's hungry?" 

**Johanna**: "Me... what'd you get?"

**Father Leon**: "Nothing fancy, since we don't really have cooking facilities here. But this'll at least tide us over."

**Johanna**: "Thanks..."

**Father Leon**: "Where's Abel?"

**Johanna**: "Bathroom, he should be out in a second, if food's involved."

**Abel**: "You brought dinner! Wonderful!"

**Johanna**: "I rest my case. And try _chewing_ your food first, Father Abel, before you choke."

**Father Leon**: "How's the data analysis coming?"

**Johanna**: "Slow, but I'm making progress. I'm almost done decrypting that stuff we picked up the other night from that business deal. In the meantime, I'm going to grab a fast shower. Make sure Abel leaves some food for me, okay?"

**Father Leon**: "Why not ask for something easy, like detouring the Tiber through Londinium?"

**Abel**: "Ha ha, very funny."

* * *

**Abel**: "I didn't know you sang in the shower, Johanna..." 

**Johanna**: "Was I that loud? Sorry."

**Father Leon**: "Don't be, you've got a nice voice."

**Johanna**: "Thanks, next time I'll take requests... oh good, there's still food left."

**Abel**: "And your program finished just a minute or two ago."

**Johanna**: "Great... let's see what we've got..."

**Father Leon**: "What is all that?"

**Johanna**: "This looks like some sort of itinerary... appointments, meetings, travel plans... oh, no-"

**Abel**: "What?"

**Johanna**: "Whoever compiled this has got spies in the homes of all three Counts... _all_ of this information has to do with them. Their upcoming schedules for the next three weeks, a complete listing of everyone who works for them... even private communiques between the Counts on business and personal matters. Who the _hell_ are we up against?!"

**Father Leon**: "This has _got_ to be the Rosencreutz' work... but we still have no way to prove it's them!"

**Johanna**: "No, but we can use this to try and convince the Counts that they're in danger."

**Abel**: "But they're going to want to know how we found all this out!"

**Johanna**: "We tell them the truth - all of this information was found at the murder sce- did you hear that?"

**Father Leon**: "Someone's outside the door..."

**Abel**: "But who?"

**Johanna**: "It looks like they just pushed something under the door."

**Abel**: "But no one knows we're here! We crossed Antwerp _twice_ before picking this hotel at random..."

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, get behind the desk and keep your gun trained on the door."

**Johanna**: "Got it."

**Father Leon**: "Abel... between the bed and the door. Let me know the instant you hear anything."

**Abel**: "Will do..."

**Johanna**: "What is it?"

**Father Leon**: "It's an envelope... no name on the front."

**Abel**: "Put gloves on before you open it... better yet, take it in the bathroom and turn on the fan, just in case."

**Father Leon**: "Good idea..."

**Johanna**: "What's it say?"

**Father Leon**: "_Steen Castle. Midnight. Watch your backs. Hugue._'"

_To be continued_...


	34. Move and Countermove

_Note: You guys find the strangest things funny... everyone can't wait to see what happens with the sleeping arrangements for Abel, Johanna, and Leon. Would someone explain to me why the harder I try to make sure that nothing romantic happens between Johanna and the guys, the more everyone wants to see it happen anyway? (I just love tossing Abel into embarrassing situations, and I know Johanna and Leon love helping out.)_

_BTW, random amusing present for you guys. The wonders of PhotoShop meet the character building ability of CITY OF HEROES, and voila! Sister Johanna Sinclair takes form... Hit my LiveJournal entry called "No, I don't have a fixation problem... really!"_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXIV**

**Johanna**: "Father Hugue is... ALIVE?! But how?!"

**Father Leon**: "This _is_ Hugue we're talking about, after all. He's got more lives than a cat, I think."

**Johanna**: "But why wouldn't he just come in? I mean, if he knows we're here..."

**Abel**: "What's that old saying about putting all your eggs in one basket?"

**Father Leon**: "It makes sense to keep at least one of us separate from the others, just in case of... accidents."

**Johanna**: "Yeah, burning down a cathedral does make an effective object lesson. So, we've got, what, four hours before midnight? What do we do until then?

**Father Leon**: "It'll take us about an hour to get to Steen Castle from here. I say we get there an hour early to make sure that there aren't any other unpleasant surprises waiting for us."

**Abel**: "Do we travel together or separately?"

**Father Leon**: "Together. While it might draw more attention, we can't afford to have a repeat of the other night."

**Abel**: "I agree. In the meantime, Johanna, I want you to keep at that information collating project of yours, and make another backup of your information, now that you've decrypted it."

**Johanna**: "Got it. But... I hate to be the devil's advocate, but can we be _sure_ that the note's from Father Hugue?"

**Father Leon**: "Why do you think we're getting there early?"

**Johanna**: "Good point."

**Father Leon**: "And to be on the safe side, wear your priest's robes, not your habit. I want you have the extra firepower on you in case things get ugly."

**Johanna**: "I was planning on it, actually."

**Abel**: "However... that does bring up a concern I have."

**Father Leon**: "Which is?"

**Abel**: "Johanna going back into combat, after what happened last time..."

**Johanna**: "You're afraid of me losing control again..."

**Abel**: "It was an understandable reaction, but one we can ill afford. When the time comes... will you be able to do what is necessary?"

**Johanna**: "I... I won't know until that time comes."

**Father Leon**: "Well, we'll have to cross that bridge when we get to it. It's not like we have a lot of options right now..."

* * *

**Johanna**: "Oh, _wow_..." 

**Abel**: "Close your mouth, Sister, you look like a tourist."

**Johanna**: "But Father Abel, it's _cool_! I _love_ castles. I wonder what it looks like on the inside..."

**Father Leon**: "Johanna, Abel, don't move..."

**Abel**: "What did you see?"

**Father Leon**: "... nothing. Just a trick of the lantern light up there. Sorry, false alarm."

**Abel**: "Better safe than sorry. Come on, let's check the rest of the courtyard before he gets here."

**Johanna**: "I'm surprised this place is still open at this hour."

**Abel**: "The castle itself is closed, but the courtyard remains open all hours of the day and night."

**Johanna**: "Maybe before we go, I can come back here and... that's odd."

**Father Leon**: "What?"

**Johanna**: "I thought I heard something up ahead."

**Abel**: "There's nothing here... at least not now."

**Johanna**: "Great, nothing like a little paranoia to keep me on my toes."

**Father Leon**: "The rest of the courtyard looks clear. Now all we have to do is wait for Hugue..."

**Johanna**: "_If_ he's really coming..."

**Abel**: "Come on, have a little faith!"

**Father Leon**: "Quiet... someone's coming. Johanna, get in that alcove, keep your gun handy, and keep your eyes on the entrances. Make sure no uninvited guests show up at this party."

**Johanna**: "Yes, Father..."

* * *

**Hugue**: "You're late." 

**Abel**: "We got here an hour early to be certain of our safety and yours, how does that make us late?"

**Hugue**: "Should have been two."

**Father Leon**: "Like Johanna said, nothing like a little paranoia... So what's the deal? And what happened at Our Lady's Cathedral? Obviously you got out all right, but..."

**Hugue**: "I failed."

**Abel**: "Don't blame yourself, Hugue... you couldn't have saved everyone there."

**Hugue**: "Not that. The saboteur escaped."

**Father Leon**: "You mean the ones responsible?"

**Hugue**: "One."

**Abel**: "One person burned down Our Lady's? That's not possible."

**Hugue**: "I know what I saw."

**Father Leon**: "Even for a vampire to move that fast, to destroy the entire cathedral singlehandedly... I've never heard of anything like it before."

**Abel**: "You'll keep investigating?"

**Hugue**: "Of course."

**Abel**: "And the reason for tonight's meeting?"

**Hugue**: "Memling's assassination. Two nights from now."

**Father Leon**: "You got details?"

**Hugue**: "Right here."

**Abel**: "Since you're telling us this, I presume you are _not_ the one intent on taking him down. We'll have Johanna double-check the information just to be certain. Will you be coming back with us?"

**Hugue**: "No... but I'll be watching."

**Father Leon**: "No need to be all mysterious, Hugue- Johanna, what are you-"

**Johanna**: "Someone's here... I saw a shadow, up there on the wall..."

**Abel**: "A guard?"

**Johanna**: "I don't think so- GET DOWN!"

**Abel**: "Johanna!"

**Johanna**: "Don't worry about me, just stay down... Come _on_, you bastard, where _are_ you?"

**Father Leon**: "Up there!"

**Me**: "Damn! Missed him, or if I hit him, it wasn't enough to slow him down. God, they move _fast_..."

**Father Leon**: "Hugue, where are you- damn it..."

**Abel**: "He's the fastest, with any luck he'll catch whoever that was. Johanna, you okay?"

**Johanna**: "Yeah... but who in their right mind attacks with a _flamethrower_?!"

_To be continued_...


	35. Diplomatic Negotiations, Johanna Style

_Note: Glad everyone enjoyed the last chapter... now it's time to move the pieces into position for the next gambit. _

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXV**

**Leon**: "It's been an hour, and Hugue's still not back yet."

**Johanna**: "You think he went back to that hostel we're staying at?"

**Abel**: "It's possible... but knowing Hugue, he could be anywhere right now. It's best we just stay put for now."

**Johanna**: "Of course, that's assuming he's all right."

**Leon**: "Like I said before, this _is_ Hugue we're talking about."

**Johanna**: "Oh, this is _ridiculous_. It's time we stop reacting, and start _acting_."

**Leon**: "Great idea. How do you plan to do that?"

**Johanna**: "Go talk to Memling."

**Abel**: "Are you crazy?"

**Johanna**: "Damn it, I want answers, and I'm sick of being patient. I'm also tired, cold, scared, and _seriously_ pissed off at having some vampire try and barbecue me with a flamethrower. I vote we go to talk to the Count, get a few answers, and then get some well-deserved sleep."

**Abel**: "Johanna, you can't just go barging into a Methusaleh's home at one o' clock in the morning, especially if he's the Count that oversees the city!"

**Johanna**: "Really? _Watch_ me."

* * *

**Memling**: "Tobias, I thought I'd given specific instructions that I was not to be disturbed." 

**Tobias**: "Yes, your Excellency. However, I was convinced that this was a matter of grave importance and that it should be brought to your attention as quickly as possible."

**Memling**: "And how were you convinced that this was the case?"

**Tobias**: "By the fact that the woman standing behind me has a gun loaded with silver ammunition pointed directly at my heart."

**Memling**: "I see... yes, that would be considered most persuasive."

**Johanna**: "I beg your pardon for intruding using such rude means, your Excellency, but I wanted to make certain that we got your attention."

**Memling**: "You have it. You may go, Tobias."

**Tobias**: "Thank you, your Excellency."

**Memling**: "And you are...?"

**Johanna**: "Sister Johanna Sinclair, on special assignment from the Vatican."

**Memling**: "For a nun, you seem remarkably unafraid to confront a Methusaleh alone in his home."

**Johanna**: "To be honest, it's the adrenaline from being shot at earlier. Right now, I'm just here to do a job and leave. That's it."

**Memling**: "And what makes you think that you're going to just _walk_ out of here, if your intent is hostile?"

**Johanna**: "Because my intent _isn't_ hostile. As a matter of fact, I'm here to save your life."

**Memling**: "I'm surprised they sent you here alone. The other two Vatican operatives here with you, I mean. Yes, I do keep tabs on what happens in my city."

**Johanna**: "Actually..."

**Leon**: "She's not alone."

**Abel**: "She just believes in a more unorthodox approach, and an unsanctioned one, at that."

**Leon**: "You're just irritated that it worked as well as it did."

**Johanna**: "My colleagues, your Excellency. Father Abel Nightroad, and Father Leon Garcia de Asturias."

**Memling**: "Good evening, gentlemen. So, Sister... what is so important that you would threaten one of my staff, rather than pursuing the more acceptable diplomatic channels?"

**Johanna**: "Because right now, the only people I trust here in Antwerp are standing on either side of me. And the fewer channels we have to go through, the happier we're going to be. So, with all due respect, your Excellency, Fathers... I recommend skipping all the politically correct verbal fencing."

**Memling**: "A most refreshing change. Do sit down."

**Abel**: "Thank you. I apologize in advance if this sounds melodramatic. Our intel indicates that someone is planning to assassinate you, your Excellency. We are here on behalf of the Vatican to assure you that we are investigating the matter, to prevent any open confrontation between the Counts of the Four-City Alliance and the Church."

**Memling**: "And what makes you think that someone would want to kill me?"

**Leon**: "Well, that depends on whether the two surviving Counts intend to take you out before you take them out, the way you did Karel Vandenburg. And before you start lying about it, don't bother."

**Memling**: "I see."

**Johanna**: "However, there is another faction at work here that would be more than pleased to watch the Four-City Alliance self-destruct. We don't want that, any more than you do, I should imagine."

**Memling**: "Then how do you account for the fact that a Vatican operative has already assassinated no less than twenty-six people in my city?"

**Abel**: "The eight murders that took place the other night were _not_ the work of the Vatican."

**Memling**: "But you don't deny that the eighteen murders that took place a week or so ago _were_ the result of your operative."

**Abel**: "_That_ we're still investigating."

**Memling**: "Until someone so coincidentally destroyed your cathedral."

**Johanna**: "And if it was you, then I hope you've made your peace with God, because I will introduce you to Him personally."

**Abel**: "Johanna..."

**Memling**: "No matter what you might believe, Sister, I was _not_ involved in the destruction of Our Lady's Cathedral, nor did I sanction it in any way. I have no desire to have the Vatican swarming all over my city."

**Leon**: "Is that why you sent someone to Steen Castle earlier this evening to try and kill us?"

**Memling**: "What are you talking about?"

**Johanna**: "A Methusaleh tried to kill us earlier when we met with... a fellow operative during the process of our investigations into the murders."

**Memling**: "I had nothing to do with it."

**Abel**: "Strangely enough, I believe you. As far as the assassination attempt, your Excellency, we've received word it is planned for two nights from now."

**Memling**: "I see... and the other Counts?"

**Leon**: "We've not yet been able to discover if their lives are at stake as well, although it's a pretty safe bet that if someone's gunning for one of you, the others are next in line."

**Memling**: "And you have proof of all of this?"

**Abel**: "Yes."

**Memling**: "This lends itself to an interesting option..."

**Leon**: "And that is?"

**Memling**: "In two nights, there will be a fete here at my estate. The assassin, if your claims are true, will most likely strike then. If you really are here to prevent an open conflict between the Four-City Alliance and the Vatican, perhaps I should request that you three attend as well, to provide additional... security."

**Johanna**: "Oh, good, I LOVE parties..."

_To be continued_...


	36. Good Night, Sweet Priest

_Note: Three words for y'all..._

_Heh heh heh._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXVI**

**Johanna**: "God, I am _tired_..."

**Leon**: "Well, it _has_ been a long day, what with the investigation, the cathedral being burned down, all the research you've been doing, that whole mess at Steen Castle, then that meeting with Memling..."

**Johanna**: "I feel like I got up a week ago and I haven't gone to sleep again since. I don't think I've had days like this since I was in college during exams week."

**Leon**: "Get used to it... life in the AX can be pretty exhausting."

**Johanna**: "I'll say. If either of you wakes me up before I've gotten at least eight hours of sleep, start reciting Acts of Contrition..."

**Abel**: "Uh, Johanna..."

**Johanna**: "Which reminds me... who's sleeping with whom?"

**Leon**: "Abel's next to you tonight, tomorrow night we'll switch."

**Abel**: "Um..."

**Johanna**: "What? Oh. Sorry about that, force of habit. Forgive the pun. Even if I'm not wearing a habit, I'm wearing robes. God, I think the more tired I am, the less sense I make."

**Leon**: "Huh?"

**Johanna**: "Nothing. Just forgot where I was for a moment. Don't stress, Father Abel, I promise to sleep in my robes, if it'll make you feel better."

**Leon**: "What are you talking about?"

**Johanna**: "Oh, it's nothing. Father Abel freaked out when he found out I normally sleep naked."

**Leon**: "Oh _really_? And just how did YOU find out about THAT?"

**Abel**: "Get that leer off your face, Leon, it was nothing like that-"

**Leon**: "Uh-_huh_."

**Johanna**: "You are just too cute sometimes, Father Abel. But hell, sleep naked for all I care, I've seen it all anyway."

**Leon**: "By the way, if he starts snoring too badly, Johanna, feel free to move over here."

**Johanna**: "Sorry, Father Leon, you'll just have to wait your turn..."

**Abel**: "I do NOT snore!"

**Leon**: "Keep telling yourself that, Four-Eyes. Johanna, do you snore?"

**Johanna**: "Well, only when I'm sick."

**Leon**: "That's good to know."

**Johanna**: "I _do_ talk in my sleep, though."

**Abel**: "Should I be worried?"

**Johanna**: "Ummmmm..."

**Leon**: "Oh, stop complaining and get into bed with her already. Jeez, you'd think you could show a little more enthusiasm."

**Abel**: "We're SUPPOSED to be men of the cloth, Leon..."

**Johanna**: "More's the pity... if we were all single, I could _really_ show you how to find God."

**Abel**: "JOHANNA!!! And damn it, Leon, STOP LAUGHING!"

**Leon**: "I'm turning off the lights now... try and behave, you two."

**Abel**: "I'm not going to get any sleep tonight, am I?"

**Johanna**: "I am _so_ not going to answer that."

* * *

**Voice #1**: "Back already?" 

**Voice #2**: "As you instructed, I attacked only to wound and distract them, then left."

**Voice #1**: "I presume you were followed?"

**Voice #2**: "Briefly, but managed to lose him."

**Voice #1**: "Who pursued you?"

**Voice #2**: "The one responsible for the deaths of the vampires in Amsterdam."

**Voice #1**: "And the others?"

**Voice #2**: "Two priests and a nun."

**Voice #1**: "Did any of them see you?"

**Voice #2**: "Not clearly, no."

**Voice #1**: "IDs?"

**Voice #2**: "The first priest was tall and muscular. Dark hair and rough-looking."

**Voice #1**: "Hmmm... not one that I know."

**Voice #2**: "The other priest was also tall, but thin. Long white hair and glasses."

**Voice #1**: "Father Abel Nightroad. So, the dear Father has come to Antwerp. And the nun? Was she a young woman with red hair?"

**Voice #2**: "No. Tall, with a womanly build and face. Dark hair and dressed as a priest."

**Voice #1**: "Interesting... I wonder who she is."

**Voice #2**: "Does it really matter?"

**Voice #1**: "Not really, no. So, they managed to escape that little conflagration you'd set at the church."

**Voice #2**: "So it would seem."

**Voice #1**: "I shouldn't be too surprised, if I were you. Fate does seem to protect fools, and Father Nightroad is more foolish than most."

**Voice #2**: "But the information they have..."

**Voice #1**: "... is now just as dangerous to them as it is to us. Let them fumble about with it for the next two days, for all the good it will do them. Remember, this is only the beginning."

**Voice #2**: "At any rate, you'll have your chance to see them two nights from now, at Memling's estate."

**Voice #1**: "You're sure they'll be there?"

**Voice #2**: "Yes. It seems they went directly to Memling regarding this matter, and he's invited them to join him at the festivities."

**Voice #1**: "And all the preparations are in place for the Count's grand event?"

**Voice #2**: "Exactly as you directed."

**Voice #1**: "Excellent. It should be quite a party..."

* * *

**Johanna**: "Um, Father Abel... Sister Johanna to Father Abel..." 

**Abel**: "Mmmmmm..."

**Johanna**: "While I don't mind you having your arm around my waist, Father..."

**Abel**: "Five more minutes..."

**Johanna**: "... you _might_ want to move your hand before Father Leon sees you..."

**Leon**: "What are you rambling on about, Joha- oh HO!"

**Abel**: "Wha- OH MY G-!!!"

**Johanna**: "Mind the edge of the-"

**Abel**: "OWWWWWWW!!!"

**Johanna**: "-bed."

**Abel**: "Ow ow ow ow ow ow..."

**Johanna**: "Now we're even, Father Abel."

**Leon**: "Where'd he go?"

**Johanna**: "He fell off the bed. I'm not sure if I should be offended... took me forever to get him into bed, and only five seconds to drive him out again. My ego may not survive the experience."

**Abel**: "I didn't- they were- I wouldn't- I was- I-I-I had no idea-"

**Johanna**: "And to think I was worried about ME behaving..."

**Abel**: "I-I thought- I wasn't- you were-"

**Johanna**: "Was it good for you, darling?"

**Abel**: "IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!"

**Leon**: "_Right_..."

**Johanna**: "Oh, for God's sake, Father, get a grip."

**Leon**: "I thought that was the problem."

**Abel**: "LEON!"

**Johanna**: "Calm down, Father Abel, before you pass out. Okay?"

**Abel**: "Dear Lord, forgive me..."

**Johanna**: "... and in future, lead me not into temptation, I can find it just fine on my own."

**Abel**: "JOHANNA!!!"

**Johanna**: "Sorry..."

_To be continued_...


	37. The Game within a Game

_Note: For those of you who've been keeping up with the story, by now you have probably guessed who the players are in this round of the game. So now that all the pieces are in place..._

_... let the game begin._

_(And before I forget - new side story up for you guys you might find interesting... check out the poem 'Waltzing in Hell', available under the TRINITY BLOOD category.)_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXVII**

**Memling**: "Ah, good afternoon, Fathers... Sister. You're a little early."

**Abel**: "With all due respect, your Excellency, if we're going to be providing security, we felt it wiser to arrive early and conduct our own search."

**Memling**: "An applaudable attitude. By all means... however, I had meant to ask if you three have brought suitable clothes for tonight. It would hardly do to have three priests roaming around."

**Leon**: "Well, actually... no."

**Memling**: "Well, no matter. Tobias?"

**Tobias**: "Yes, your Excellency?"

**Memling**: "Our guests will need appropriate attire for this evening."

**Tobias**: "Yes, your Excellency."

**Abel**: "Oh, no, we really couldn't-"

**Memling**: "Nonsense. As a man of my position, it is important to keep up appearances."

**Johanna**: "I get to see you two in evening wear... this whole day just became worth it!"

**Leon**: "You have the _strangest_ set of priorities, you know that?"

* * *

**Abel**: "Anything?" 

**Leon**: "Nope... searched the grounds, couldn't find anything recently disturbed enough to indicate explosives or stuff like it."

**Johanna**: "And the staff hasn't had any recent changes to indicate that they're smuggling in someone new just for the occasion."

**Abel**: "Well, they obviously have _something_ planned..."

**Johanna**: "You think Memling would let us check out the guest list?"

**Leon**: "We don't know who we're even looking for."

**Johanna**: "Don't you guys have something like a 'Ten Most Wanted Vampires' list or anything?"

**Abel**: "No, actually, we don't."

**Johanna**: "Great."

* * *

**Leon**: "Well, well, well... for a vampire, Memling's got good taste in women's clothes. You look fantastic!" 

**Johanna**: "Thanks... I think. I'm not too keen on having to wear this stupid corset, but oh, well, the things I do for this job..."

**Abel**: "I assume you've managed to hide at least one of your guns under that skirt?"

**Johanna**: "No. Be easy enough to hide it, but I'd never get to it in time to make use of it."

**Leon**: "But if we get into a firefight-"

**Johanna**: "I can always-"

**Abel**: "_NO_!"

**Johanna**: "Fine... I'll _try_ to find a way to make a gun accessible in all this. I wonder if I could get away with wearing my boots under this dress instead of these blasted heels! But I don't think I can bend at the waist to put them on..."

* * *

**Memling**: "Ah, Sister Johanna, I hope you approve of my choice." 

**Johanna**: "Yes, thank you very much, your Excellency."

**Abel**: "Just to keep you informed... one of us will be near you at all times this evening while the other two circulate amongst the crowd."

**Memling**: "Just so. Do enjoy yourselves this evening. And don't worry, my own guards are here as well."

**Leon**: "Do you trust them?"

**Memling**: "Would I have employed them if I didn't?"

**Johanna**: "Let's just hope they're up for this..."

* * *

**Memling**: "So, Johanna, your turn to play nursemaid?" 

**Johanna**: "Sorry, your Excellency, Father Abel's orders."

**Memling**: "Oh, well, I gather it can't be helped. Are you enjoying yourself so far?"

**Johanna**: "Yes, but that's not why I'm here. Have your guards reported anything suspicious?"

**Memling**: "Not yet, no, but guests are still arriving. Speaking of which, someone I'd like you to meet. Radu Barvon, Baron of Luxor, meet Johanna Sinclair."

**Radu**: "A pleasure, my lady."

**Johanna**: "Thank you."

**Radu**: "Would you care to dance?"

**Johanna**: "Oh... well, um..."

**Memling**: "Go on, Johanna, enjoy yourself."

**Johanna**: "But-"

**Memling**: "He's an Imperial aristocrat, and you wouldn't want to offend one of my guests, now would you?"

**Johanna**: "No, your Excellency. Thank you, Baron, I would be _delighted_ to."

* * *

**Leon**: "Hey, Four-Eyes, look sharp." 

**Abel**: "What is she doing? She's supposed to be watching the Count-"

**Leon**: "Looks like she couldn't get herself out of that one gracefully. _You_ keep an eye on the Count, _I'll_ keep an eye on her."

**Abel**: "Got it."

* * *

**Radu**: "You dance wonderfully, my lady..." 

**Johanna**: "Just Johanna, please. You say 'my lady', and I feel like I have to be all elegant and refined, which really I'm not."

**Radu**: "On the contrary, you seem to be a most charming woman. Hmm, with all these people, it's quite warm in here. I think I'll step outside for some fresh air. Would you like to join me?"

**Johanna**: "Well, I..."

**Radu**: "Please, I _insist_..."

* * *

**Memling**: "Ladies and gentlemen, respected and noble guests..."

* * *

**Johanna**: "Thank you very much for the dance, Baron, but I should be getting back inside now." 

**Radu**: "So sorry, my dear, but I'm afraid I can't do that..."

**Johanna**: "What are you doing? Let me go-ow-_ohhhhhhhh_..."

**Radu**: "Such a pity, but business before pleasure, I'm afraid. Sleep well... _Sister_."

* * *

**Abel**: "I thought you were keeping an eye on Johanna..." 

**Leon**: "She stepped outside for some air with the man she was dancing with. What are you staring at?"

**Abel**: "That alcove up on the landing... I thought I saw someone up there... I'll be right back... stay with the Count!"

* * *

**Memling**: "Tonight is an evening of celebration..."

* * *

**Abel**: "Who's there- unhhhh..."

* * *

**Memling**: "Let the evening festivities beg-" 

**Guest #1**: "FIRE!"

**Guest #2**: "WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!"

**Memling**: "What is going on?!"

**Leon**: "The assassins probably set the fire to create panic, and then plan to kill you in the middle of the chaos. Where the _hell_ did Abel and Johanna go?"

* * *

**Leon**: "Abel? What happened?!" 

**Abel**: "Ohhhhh... someone... hit me... from behind... where's Johanna?"

**Leon**: "I don't know. Come on, let's get out of here!"

**Memling**: "But my staff, my guards-"

**Abel**: "Your safety is my primary concern- BEHIND YOU!"

**Assassin #1**: "Traitor!"

**Assassin #2**: "Kill him!"

* * *

**Leon**: "Five on three... better odds than we got the other night." 

**Assassin #3**: "Death to- AAGGH!"

**Memling**: "You incompetent fools, did you _really_ think you could just assassinate me in my own home?!"

**Assassin #5**: "You killed Count Vanden- AGH!"

**Abel**: "Don't kill them! We need them _alive_!"

**Leon**: "You got it!"

**Assassin #2**: "Damn you- ARGH!"

**Leon**: "What have you done with Johanna?"

**Assassin #4**: "Who?"

**Memling**: "Die, filth!"

**Assassin #4**: "AAACK!"

**Abel**: "I SAID DON'T KILL THEM! Where is she?!"

**Assassin #1**: "I don't know who you're talking about!"

**Leon**: "Damn it..."

* * *

**Memling**: "Now talk, scum. Who hired you?" 

**Assassin #1**: "I'll tell you nothing, you traitor- ACK!"

**Memling**: "And how many of your limbs do I have to slice off before you change your mind?"

**Assassin #1**: "Go ahead... you still won't get an ans-"

**Memling**, **Assassin #1**: "AAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!!"

**Abel**: "EXCELLENCY!"

**Leon**: "ABEL, GET DOWN!"

**Abel**: "A _flamethrower_?!"

**Leon**: "Damn it all to hell... EXCELLENCY!"

**Abel**: "It's no good... he's dead..."

_To be continued_...


	38. All Hell Breaks Loose

_Note: Yes, I am evil. Yes, the enemy has won a victory here. But it's not good drama unless the good guys lose every now and again. Otherwise, the bad guys aren't that bad. But now that the good guys have blood in their eye, as the saying goes, I can start pulling out all the stops._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXVIII**

**Guest #1**: "The Count... Count Memling is dead!"

**Guest #2**: "It _can't_ be!"

**Guest #3**: "He was murdered!"

**Abel**: "Please, ladies and gentlemen, you _have_ to remain calm! Please move away from the house, for your own safety!"

**Guest #4**: "The Count's dead!"

**Leon**: "Johanna! Johanna, are you out here?!"

**Guest #5**: "This can't be happening!"

**Leon**: "Have you seen a woman with dark hair in a blue velvet dress?"

**Guest #6**: "Not recently, no..."

**Leon**: "Damn it! Johanna!"

**Guest #7**: "What happened to the Count?"

**Abel**: "Everyone, _please_!"

**Guest #8**: "He was assassinated!"

**Guest #9**: "Find them! Find the ones responsible!"

**Leon**: "You! Is there anyone _still_ in the house?"

**Guard #1**: "No, sir... when we first saw the fire, we evacuated everyone as quickly as we could... everyone we could find, that is."

**Leon**: "Did you come across a woman with dark hair, wearing a blue velvet dress?"

**Guard #2**: "The woman who was with you? No, sir."

**Abel**: "Listen carefully. Get the names of _all_ the guests and servants outside, just in case there were people still left in there."

**Guard #3**: "Yes, sir."

**Guest #10**: "First Count Vandenburg, now Count Memling!"

**Guest #11**: "The Vatican wants to wipe out all Methusaleh!"

**Guest #12**: "This is their revenge for the destruction of their church!"

**Guest #13**: "How many more will die?"

**Abel**: "Uh-oh..."

**Leon**: "JOHANNA! WHERE ARE YOU?!"

**Abel**: "Leon, you're _not_ going in there!"

**Leon**: "This time, there isn't a member of the fire brigade around to stop me."

**Abel**: "Leon-"

**Leon**: "Either help me or get out of my way!"

**Guest #14**: "Find them! Find the Vatican assassins and kill them!"

**Guest #15**: "Kill them!"

**Abel**: "Didn't you say she had gone outside with that man she was dancing with?"

**Leon**: "Yeah, out on the terrace."

**Abel**: "Then we'll look there first, because we'd better get away from this crowd!"

* * *

**Kate**: "Your Eminence, I'm terribly sorry for waking you, but I have urgent news from Antwerp." 

**Caterina**: "Yes, Sister, what is it?"

**Kate**: "Our intel has just picked up transmissions indicating that Count Memling was just assassinated at a party at his estate."

**Caterina**: "_What_?!"

**Kate**: "We don't have all the details yet... it seems that a fire broke out and when the estate was evacuated, the Count was killed in the confusion. Reports are still coming in, but it seems that all hell has broken loose in Antwerp."

**Caterina**: "This is all we need. Send word to every church in Antwerp where we have contacts. They are to evacuate _all_ non-essential personnel, in the event of retaliation on the vampires' part. I can only pray it doesn't come to that, but..."

**Kate**: "After the destruction of Our Lady's Cathedral, it is a necessary precaution, my lady."

**Caterina**: "What about our agents? Are they all right?"

**Kate**: "No word as of yet. And given that Father Nightroad and the others were supposed to be attending this party, breaking radio silence may be dangerous."

**Caterina**: "Damn it... Professor!"

**WWW**: "_Yes, your Eminence_?"

**Caterina**: "Are your upgrades to the _Iron Maiden_ finished?"

**WWW**: "_There's still some fine tuning that has to be_-"

**Caterina**: "YES or NO, Professor?"

**WWW**: "_Um... no_."

**Caterina**: "How long before the _Iron Maiden_ can be on its way to Antwerp?"

**WWW**: "_About twenty-four hours, give or take._"

**Caterina**: "You have twelve."

**WWW**: "_My lady_-"

**Caterina**: "Get down to the hangar and get to work. I'll be notifying Gunslinger, Mistress, Know Faith, and Esther in just a moment to meet you down there and lend whatever assistance they can. Sister Kate will be joining you momentarily."

**WWW**: "_Yes, your Eminence_."

**Caterina**: "Kate, continue to monitor whatever information you get regarding this matter. I want constant updates, and whatever you do, _don't_ tell Francesco about this unless directly confronted about the issue."

**Kate**: "Yes, my lady."

**Caterina**: "Thank you, Sister."

**Kate**: "It's... it's bad, isn't it, your Eminence?"

**Caterina**: "If this is truly the work of the Rosencreutz... yes, Sister Kate. It's bad. Relay my orders to the others, then see to the Professor."

**Kate**: "Yes, your Eminence."

* * *

**Abel**: "Johanna! Johanna, it's us! Can you hear us?" 

**Leon**: "Johanna! Are you here? _Johanna_!"

**Abel**: "That man that Johanna was dancing with..."

**Leon**: "Tall, slim, dark hair..."

**Abel**: "Any idea who he is?"

**Leon**: "Not a clue."

**Abel**: "Would you recognize him if you saw him?"

**Leon**: "Damn straight I would. Okay, this is where she would have been after leaving the ballroom."

**Abel**: "Quick, check the far side of the terrace. Johanna!"

**Leon**: "No, nothing here. Johanna! Johanna, can you hear us?!"

**Abel**: "Johanna! Where are you?! Jo-... oh, God."

**Leon**: "What is it?"

**Abel**: "I just found _this_..."

**Leon**: "A broken necklace?"

**Abel**: "This is the chain Johanna wears around her neck... to hold her wedding ring."

**Leon**: "Her _what_?!"

**Abel**: "It's a long story... but where's her ring?"

**Leon**: "Here it is... it must have come loose when the necklace snapped. But the question is, did she remove the chain herself, or did someone yank it off her?"

**Abel**: "I don't know... but she was _definitely_ here..."

**Leon**: "You don't think she would have gone back inside, do you?"

**Abel**: "God, I hope not... but if she were trying to escape, it'd make more sense for her to go over the side of the terrace..."

**Leon**: "It's a drop of about twenty feet from here to the lawn, so maybe she- oh, _hell_..."

**Abel**: "What? What is it?"

**Leon**: "Look here..."

**Abel**: "Is that...?"

**Leon**: "Blood..."

_To be continued_...


	39. Rude Awakenings

_Note: Allow me to reassure you - no, Johanna is not dead. Otherwise, the story would be over (or just about, anyway). And I'm not going to end it like THAT!_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XXXIX**

**Johanna**: "Oh, my _head_..."

**Radu**: "Ah, you're awake at last. Good."

**Johanna**: "B-Baron Luxor? What happened? How long have I been out?"

**Radu**: "A couple of hours."

**Johanna**: "_Owwww_... I feel like my brain is sloshing around inside my skull."

**Radu**: "Yes, there was the possibility of concussion after knocking you out, but these things happen."

**Johanna**: "Knock- It was you! _You_ hit me!"

**Radu**: "Yes, I did. I suppose I should apologize for that."

**Johanna**: "You _bastard_! When I get- **OW**!"

**Radu**: "The bars are reinforced steel. You'd have to be a Methusaleh to bend them even a little."

**Johanna**: "Let me out of here!"

**Radu**: "Sorry, I can't do that."

**Johanna**: "I SAID LET ME OUT!"

**Radu**: "I'd advise you to stop... you'll never be able to dislodge the bars, but we can't have you hurting yourself in the process."

**Johanna**: "How _dare_ you hit me?!"

**Radu**: "Temper, temper... you'd best remember your manners... _Sister_."

**Johanna**: "Wha- how did-?"

**Radu**: "You have not seen me before, but I have seen you. And I must say, the dress you're wearing now is far more attractive on you than your priest's robes."

**Johanna**: "When did you- never mind. More to the point, why did you knock me out and bring me here? And where exactly is _here_, anyway?!"

**Radu**: "Some place where your dear Fathers won't be able to find you. Where we are is a cozy little hideaway... just the two of us."

**Johanna**: "If you were _that_ eager for a date, you could have just asked. And iron bars hardly inspire romance, you know."

**Radu**: "For a Terran, you have a fine spirit. I could almost grow to like you."

**Johanna**: "I'm so glad."

**Radu**: "Interesting... I wonder what put that spark of fear into your eyes just now."

**Johanna**: "What are you talking about?"

**Radu**: "You weren't scared when you first woke up... but now, there's something different about you. Are you afraid of me?"

**Johanna**: "No..."

**Radu**: "You're a terrible liar, my dear."

**Johanna**: "And you still didn't answer my other question. Why _did_ you bring me here?"

**Radu**: "I'm afraid I can't tell you that."

**Johanna**: "Then if you can't tell me, you had _damned_ well better find someone who can!"

**Radu**: "There's no rush... we'll have plenty of time to... get to know one another."

**Johanna**: "Damn you..."

**Radu**: "Such language, and from a nun... I'm shocked. And you were so friendly and charming at the late Count's party, too."

**Johanna**: "The la- you mean he's _dead_?"

**Radu**: "I'm afraid so. There was an... unfortunate accident at the Count's party earlier this evening. I didn't have the opportunity to stay and watch the aftermath, but I'm told it made a very pretty bonfire... not unlike the one that cost you your cathedral."

**Johanna**: "YOU burned down Our Lady's?! YOU _BASTARD_! Good men and women DIED that night because of _you_!"

**Radu**: "Yes. Such a pity."

**Johanna**: "So help me God, when I get out of here, I am going to rip your _spine_ out through your _mouth_!"

**Radu**: "As tempting as it would be to watch you try, I have an appointment I must keep. But don't worry. I'll be back later so we can spend more time with each other."

* * *

**Kate**: "Iron Maiden _calling _Crusnik." 

**Abel**: "I read you, Sister Kate."

**Kate**: "_Her Eminence is requesting an update on the situation_."

**Abel**: "As of now, Count Memling is dead, killed by an unknown assailant. It was as though someone attacked us with a flamethrower, not unlike an incident we faced two nights earlier at Steen Castle. The assassins fled the scene before we could pursue. And to make matters worse... Johanna is missing."

**Kate**: "_What_?"

**Abel**: "Shortly before he was murdered, she was drawn away from the main ballroom by one of the Count's guests. She didn't seem to want to go, but rather than make a scene or risk offending him, she went with him. We believe that once they were outside, the man in question knocked her unconscious. A few minutes later, someone set fire to the house, and in the confusion, Leon, the Count, and I were attacked. We attempted to take the assassins alive, but the one that survived was then killed along with the Count. Leon and I then searched for Johanna, but were unable to find her."

**Leon**: "We did, however, find her necklace on the terrace, where her dance partner had led her earlier. We also found..."

**Kate**: "_Found what_?"

**Leon**: "We found blood. Not enough to indicate she'd been killed and then her body removed, but definitely injured."

**Kate**: "_Do what you can to try and locate Johanna. The Professor and I will be in Antwerp with the_ Iron Maiden _in roughly six hours. Once there, we may be able to help you locate her_."

**Abel**: "How do you propose to do that?"

**Kate**: "_Well_-"

**WWW**: "_As it happens, I've installed something in the_ Iron Maiden _that works off a similar principle to your communicators. Your bioelectric signatures have been logged and programmed into the scanners so we can detect a person's exact location_."

**Leon**: "Isn't that the invention that blew out Security's computer systems for a week after you tried using it?"

**WWW**: "_Well, I've improved on it since then_."

**Leon**: "Somehow I don't find that too reassuring... what's the range on that thing?"

**WWW**: "_I don't know, I haven't had a chance to test it_."

**Abel**: "Well, the minute you two are on your way, start trying to find her."

* * *

**Johanna**: "CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME?! ANYBODY?! PLEASE, SOMEONE LET ME OUT OF HERE! SOMEBODY, PLEASE HELP ME!! SOMEBODY-" 

**Radu**: "It's useless to yell. No one can hear you."

**Johanna**: "Why are you doing this?!"

**Radu**: "Because for now, we need you alive."

**Johanna**: "Please, let me out of here!!"

**Radu**: "In just a moment. There's someone who'd like to meet you. But before you get any ideas about trying to escape, I should warn you... attempt to run, and I _will_ hurt you."

**Johanna**: "You said you need me alive!"

**Radu**: "Alive, yes... unharmed... well, that's not part of the requirement. Now... come with me."

* * *

**Radu**: "Here we are... after you, my lady." 

**Johanna**: "What are we doing here?"

**Radu**: "As I said earlier, someone would like to meet you."

**Johanna**: "And that someone would be...?"

**Dietrich**: "Me."

_To be continued_...


	40. Bargaining with the Devil

_Note: You wanted, you got... _

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XL **

**Abel**: "Professor, Sister Kate, good to see you."

**Kate**: "And you... I'm glad you two are all right. Any luck in finding Johanna?"

**Leon**: "No, not yet. I gather that the Professor's invention doesn't work..."

**WWW**: "Actually, it _does_ work. That's how we were able to find you. But the range is extremely limited. Given a little time and experimenting, I'm sure I could increase-"

**Kate**: "Oh, no, you are _not_ messing around with it! I don't care if we have to dogleg over all of Antwerp!"

**WWW**: "Come now, Sister Kate, did we have a single problem on our way here, even with the modifications I made?"

**Kate**: "I SAID _NO_!"

**Leon**: "Looks like _someone_ got up on the wrong side of the hologram projector..."

**Kate**: "WHAT was that?!"

**Leon**: "Nothing..."

* * *

**Dietrich**: "Thank you, Flammeberge. I will take it from here." 

**Radu**: "Yes, Puppetmaster."

**Johanna**: "Puppetmaster? Who... who _are_ you?"

**Dietrich**: "I beg your pardon, allow me to introduce myself. Dietrich von Lohengrin. Or, if you prefer, the Puppetmaster of the Rosencreutz Order. And _you_ are Johanna Sinclair, of the Ministry of Holy Affairs. Most curious, don't you think, that officially... you don't exist. Now I wonder _why_ the Vatican would have gone to such great lengths to bury the truth about you."

**Johanna**: "Who says they have?"

**Dietrich**: "Records show you listed as Vatican personnel, but other than that, virtually _nothing_ else to verify that Johanna Sinclair even exists... but we'll come back to that subject later."

**Johanna**: "Assuming there even _is_ a 'later.'"

**Dietrich**: "Oh, I have no intentions of killing you."

**Johanna**: "That's good, because I have no intentions of _letting_ you kill me."

**Dietrich**: "Come now, we can at least be civilized. Would you care for something to drink?"

**Johanna**: "Thank you, but no."

**Dietrich**: "Please, I wouldn't do anything so crude as poison or drug you. If I wanted to bend you to my control, I have other means of doing so."

**Johanna**: "Such as- _ack_!"

**Dietrich**: "The human nervous system... capable of so much, but control it, and everything stops."

**Johanna**: "Let... go..."

**Dietrich**: "You see, I can pull your strings just as easily as I please. A twitch _here_..."

**Johanna**: "H-help..."

**Dietrich**: "... and your breath cuts off. Pull a string _there_..."

**Johanna**: "_AAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH_!"

**Dietrich**: "... and your pain sensors are stimulated. But enough of that."

**Johanna**: "Ohhhhhhhh..."

**Dietrich**: "Wine?"

**Johanna**: "Do I have a choice?"

**Dietrich**: "You _could_ refuse, but it would be rude."

**Johanna**: "... fine."

**Dietrich**: "So gracious- AAAAGGGGGHHHHH!"

**Johanna**: "Let's see how YOU like it!"

**Dietrich**: "S-STOP!"

**Johanna**: "No."

**Dietrich**: "L-LET... LET ME G-GO-"

**Johanna**: "You're so powerful, why don't you _make_ me?"

**Dietrich**: "IF... YOU... I-INSIST..."

**Johanna**: "Wha- how did- I was just holding onto you! How did you get over _there_?!" 

**Dietrich**: "Well, aren't you... just full of surprises..."

**Vampire #1**: "Sir, are you all right?"

**Dietrich**: "Yes, I'm fine..."

**Johanna**: "_Damn_ you..."

**Vampire #2**: "Shut up!"

**Johanna**: "I'll _kill_ you, I _swear_!"

**Vampire #3**: "Such bravado... from a Terran."

**Vampire #4**: "Even if you do, you can't get all of _us_..."

**Vampire #5**: "... before one of _us_ gets _you_."

**Johanna**: "_GET AWAY FROM ME_-"

**Vampire #2**: "What the-"

* * *

**Kate**: "Father Nightroad!" 

**Abel**: "What's wrong?"

**Kate**: "My sensors just picked up an explosion about thirty miles northwest of here... it's... it's like a bomb went off!"

**Leon**: "So?"

**Kate**: "Just _before_ the explosion, I registered a wild energy surge in the same location..."

**WWW**: "Not-"

**Abel**: "Johanna's power!"

**Leon**: "Damn it, she was specifically told NOT to use it-"

**WWW**: "-_unless_ it was a matter of life or death."

**Leon**: "But Johanna's power doesn't work like that... it's more like... like chain lightning. It's not nearly powerful enough to blow up anything!"

**WWW**: "That was against a _human_..."

**Abel**: "Oh, God..."

**WWW**: "Where are you going?"

**Abel**: "Sister, where did you pick up that signal?"

**Kate**: "Father, you're not going alone!"

**Abel**: "The _Iron Maiden_ is needed for the evacuation of Church personnel. Johanna would want us to see to them first. You, Leon, and the Professor need to get the others to safety before _any_ more lives are lost as the result of this madness."

* * *

**Johanna**: "Oh, my God... what- what just _happened_?" 

**Dietrich**: "Interesting... temporal disruption. Against a human, it causes shock. But against a vampire, for whom time passes somewhat differently, it would appear that you 'short out' that difference, and release it as energy. But you yourself appear to be shielded from the effect."

**Johanna**: "That explosion was... was _my_ fault?"

**Dietrich**: "_Most_ intriguing... a human with abilities like a Methusaleh. And here I'd thought I'd replaced one pawn with another. I _am_ impressed." 

**Johanna**: "What are you-"

**Dietrich**: "Well, I had originally intended to use the late Count, but while he had his uses, he failed to live up to my expectations for him, so he has been swept from the board. But it seems that fate has given me a more powerful game piece."

**Johanna**: "I'm _nobody's_ pawn. Get used to that idea."

**Dietrich**: "I could help you, you know... help you learn how to use your ability, harness it and place it under your control."

**Johanna**: "What makes you think you can do that any better than the Vatican can? And for that matter, why do you even care?"

**Dietrich**: "Did I _say_ I care? Actually, I don't give a damn about you as a person, but a gift like that shouldn't go to waste. With it, you could have _anything_ you want..."

**Johanna**: "Except the freedom to live my own life... I'd be just one more puppet dancing to your tune while you pull my strings."

**Dietrich**: "You say that with such distaste, but have you considered the fact that the Vatican is _already_ doing the exact same thing to you?"

**Johanna**: "What?!"

**Dietrich**: "You don't honestly believe that the Vatican would ever let you leave?"

**Johanna**: "That's ridiculous."

**Dietrich**: "Is it, now? By not teaching you about how to use this gift of yours, they're keeping you on a rather tight leash. As long as you don't know how to control it, you're at their mercy while they 'protect' you from yourself."

**Johanna**: "Shut up!"

**Dietrich**: "Let me guess... they've already told you that for your own safety, you shouldn't use your power."

**Johanna**: "No..."

**Dietrich**: "They _have_... and now here you are, a tool of the Vatican, unable to live your own life, or make your own choices. Is that _really_ what you want?"

**Johanna**: "I..."

_To be continued_...


	41. Pray for Us Sinners

_Note: __Now, I know that for some of you, following action scenes written in straight dialogue are hard. But this time, I have another reason for not wanting to spell out what's going on. Mainly, because horror is always more effective when I leave things up to YOUR imagination. (For those who don't believe me, if you're familiar with the SAMURAI 7 universe, go read "The Black and Awful Chaos of the Night." But I'll warn you - it's rated M for a reason.)_

_And here comes the revelation I know more than a few of you have been waiting for..._

_(By the way, the inspiration for the latter part of this chapter... Marcus versus Neroon in "Grey 17 is Missing", from BABYLON 5.)_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XLI **

**Johanna**: "I... no. No, I _won't_ join you. I _won't_ help you, I just want you to let me go!"

**Dietrich**: "I'm impressed... your strength of will is considerable, but even you can't block me out forever."

**Johanna**: "Block you ou- mind control!"

**Dietrich**: "A very crude way of putting it, but essentially, yes. Your physical strings are not the only ones that I can pull. With enough time and effort, I could break your mind as well, but then you wouldn't exactly be you anymore. So we'll just take this nice and slow. After all, we have all the time in the world... just you... and me."

**Johanna**: "Go to hell, you _bast_- AAAGGGGGGHHH!"

**Dietrich**: "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I can't do that. You see, my dear, you will come around to my way of thinking, one way or another..."

**Johanna**: "NO!"

**Dietrich**: "One side of madness or the other..."

**Johanna**: "NO- AAAAGGGHHHHH!"

**Dietrich**: "One side of death... or another."

* * *

**Vampire**: "She's stubborn. And she's held out a lot longer than I'd thought she would." 

**Dietrich**: "Yes. Which makes her all the more appealing. I haven't had a subject like her in some time."

**Vampire**: "She won't give in."

**Dietrich**: "Oh, she will... eventually. For now, though... I think it's time to move to the next step. Do it... while I have her like this. But if you even think you see her hands move, get away from her. She's already killed five Methusaleh in one go, but to use her power, she may need to grab hold of you. As long as her hands are bound, she can't do that."

**Vampire**: "Yes, sir... now hold still, love... I'd hate to break your neck by mistake."

**Johanna**: "Get your... hands off me!"

**Vampire**: "Relax... you might even enjoy this..."

**Johanna**: "Dietrich... you lying _bastard_... you said... you had... no intention-"

**Dietrich**: "I don't have any intention of killing you... but then again... you won't die."

**Johanna**: "And you think... feeding me to a... vampire _won't_ kill me?"

**Dietrich**: "Oh, he has orders not to kill you... just to make you one of them."

**Johanna**: "_No_-" 

**Vampire**: "Go ahead, scream... there's no one here to hear you."

**Johanna**: "_NOOOOOOO_!!!"

* * *

**Vampire**: "Her blood sample analysis, sir..." 

**Dietrich**: "Hmmmm. Very interesting..."

**Vampire**: "Is something wrong, sir?"

**Dietrich**: "Not necessarily wrong, but certainly noteworthy. How much did you take from her?"

**Vampire**: "Not much at all, maybe half a pint. I was focused more on injecting the bacilli into her bloodstream than I was on feeding off her. Why?"

**Dietrich**: "Do it again... only this time, take more from her."

**Johanna**: "No... please God, _no_..."

**Vampire**: "Just relax, it'll only hurt for- AGH!"

**Johanna**: "Wha- _JESUS CHRIST_!"

**Crusnik**: "_**Leave the woman out of this. Your fight is with me now**_."

* * *

**Dietrich**: "Ah, I was wondering when you might arrive." 

**Vampire**: "Such strength... to throw me as though I were a Terran, and you a Methusaleh... but you're not one of us!"

**Crusnik**: "_**I am the vengeance of Heaven... and the one who will slice you limb from limb if you don't let go of her this instant**_."

**Johanna**: "_'And the angels, terrible and without pity, carry savage weapons_...'"

**Dietrich**: "Don't worry... I'll deal with him."

**Johanna**: "Oh, God, _please_... please don't kill me..."

**Dietrich**: "If you're here to make some pathetic attempt at rescuing her, don't bother."

**Crusnik**: "_**Close your eyes and pray, Sister**_."

**Vampire**: "Get away, or I'll tear this bitch's throat out right now!"

**Crusnik**: "_**Close your eyes, Sister... NOW**_."

* * *

**Johanna**: "_Sancta Maria_..."

* * *

**Dietrich**: "That's far enough." 

**Crusnik**: "_**AAGGGH- H-how**_-"

**Dietrich**: "I've been keeping tabs on you, ever since our last meeting. And I have no intention of letting you interrupt my work."

**Crusnik**: "**_W-what are you... AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!_**"

**Dietrich**: "You'll find that your internal organs are no longer quite where they were when you entered the room."

**Crusnik**: "_**N-no...**_"

**Dietrich**: "Now, bleed to death slowly while your precious Sister is initiated into her new life."

* * *

**Johanna**: "... _Mater Dei_..."

* * *

**Crusnik**: "**_No... I won't... let you_...**" 

**Vampire**: "What is this?! WHAT ARE YOU-"

**Crusnik**: "**_I WON'T... LET YOU_**..."

**Vampire**: "NO! STOP!! NOOOOO-"

**Crusnik**: "**_For your crimes... on this earth... you are damned... but I... will pray... for us both_...**"

* * *

**Johanna**: "... _ora pro nobis peccatoribus_..."

* * *

**Dietrich**: "My, such a mess..." 

**Crusnik**: "**_Now it's... your turn..._**"

**Dietrich**: "Oh, I don't think so... you seem to have exerted the last of your strength just dealing with him."

**Crusnik**: "**_Damn... you..._**"

* * *

**Johanna**: "... _nunc et in hor mortis nostrae_..."

* * *

**Dietrich**: "But just to be on the safe side..." 

**Johanna**: "AAAAGGGHHHHHH- _ohhhhhh_..."

**Crusnik**: "**_SISTER_**!"

**Dietrich**: "A neural flare. Apart from temporarily overloading her nervous system, it induces short term memory loss. And now I'll take my leave... until next time..."

* * *

**Johanna**: "Ohhhhhhhh... w-w-what h-happened?" 

**Crusnik**: "**_Sister... are you... all right_**?"

**Johanna**: "W-who are you?"

**Crusnik**: "**_Someone sent... to protect you... You have to... get out of here_...**"

**Johanna**: "W-what about _you_? Are you hurt? I heard screaming-"

**Crusnik**: "_**Don't worry... about me... I will... cut your bonds... but do not turn around... just go**_."

**Johanna**: "No way! You saved _my_ life. Whoever you are, the least _I_ can do is help _you_."

**Crusnik**: "**_You don't... understand... you are... still in... grave danger... you must... leave now_...**"

**Johanna**: "I can't just _leave_ without knowing _who_-"

**Crusnik**: "**_No... Johanna_...**"

**Johanna**: "F-F-Father Abel?!"

_To be continued_...


	42. The Sacrifice of Angels

_This chapter does have an Author's note... but rather than risk ruining the chapter, I placed it at the end. You'll understand when you finish reading it._

_Warning - this chapter is emotional._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XLII**

**Abel**: "Jo...hanna... get... away..."

**Johanna**: "No, oh, blessed heaven, _no_... what has he done to you?"

**Abel**: "You must... leave now... please..."

**Johanna**: "Are you out of your _mind_?! I'm not leaving you like _this_!"

**Abel**: "You must..."

**Johanna**: What are you talking about?"

**Abel**: "I am... a Crusnik... Johanna. A vampire... that feeds... on other vampires."

**Johanna**: "Oh, God... then that... that... that angel that saved me was..."

**Abel**: "Yes..."

**Johanna**: "Well, can't you... you know... heal yourself? Regenerate or something?"

**Abel**: "Yes... but I... need blood."

**Johanna**: "Use his..."

**Abel**: "I can't."

**Johanna**: "What, does it have to be... um, fresh?"

**Abel**: "I cannot... feed... on him."

**Johanna**: "Why not?"

**Abel**: "The thought... of his blood... in me... after what... he did to you... is too revolting... to bear."

**Johanna**: "The hell with that! Use his blood to heal yourself!"

**Abel**: "No... please don't... ask me that..."

**Johanna**: "But will... won't you die if you don't... feed?"

**Abel**: "Eventually... but the pain... is terrible... worse than death..."

**Johanna**: "Can you... c-can you... f-feed on the blood of a human?"

**Abel**: "What?"

**Johanna**: "Can you feed on a human?"

**Abel**: "Yes, but-"

**Johanna**: "Fine."

**Abel**: "What... are you _doing_?"

**Johanna**: "Take my blood."

**Abel**: "No..."

**Johanna**: "_Yes_."

**Abel**: "But... the _thirst_... when it... takes control... there's no... stopping it..."

**Johanna**: "I don't care, I can't let you suffer because of me."

**Abel**: "I _can't_... I could... _kill_ you..."

**Johanna**: "You saved _my_ life, I am _not_ going to turn my back on _you_ just because... I'm afraid."

**Abel**: "Why do you... always... risk your life?"

**Johanna**: "Because in the end... a lifetime spent avoiding danger is no more safe nor satisfying than a lifetime spent pursuing it."

**Abel**: "_No_..."

**Johanna**: "But there's nothing else I can do!"

**Abel**: "I won't... let you..."

**Johanna**: "God _damn_ it, Father, I've already lost too many people that I love. No more..."

**Abel**: "Johanna..."

**Johanna**: "_No more!_"

**Abel**: "I..."

**Johanna**: "_Please!_"

**Abel**: "Johanna..."

**Johanna**: "Shh... it'll be all right, Father..."

**Abel**: "I'm... sorry..."

**Johanna**: "I'm not."

* * *

**WWW**: "Abel... Abel, wake up, you're all right!" 

**Abel**: "Professor, when did-?"

**WWW**: "Two hours ago. After we got the others to safety, we searched for you and Johanna. The _Iron Maiden_ was finally able to locate your bio-signature and provide us with your exact location. We're in one of the Antwerp safehouses."

**Abel**: "Wait... Johanna, where is she?!"

**WWW**: "She's in the other room. Leon and Kate are watching over her. Abel..."

**Abel**: "What?"

**WWW**: "When we found you both, you were holding Johanna in your arms... and you were... I gave you a transfusion, but you didn't need nearly as much as I thought you might have, thanks to her. But she... she lost a lot of blood helping you."

**Abel**: "How much?"

**WWW**: "Well, the human body holds between ten and twelve pints. The normal safe amount for a person to give at any one time is one pint. After four, the person's life is in danger."

**Abel**: "Tell me the truth, Professor. How much did I... did I take from her?"

**WWW**: "Well..."

**Abel**: "HOW MUCH?"

**WWW**: "... Seven."

**Abel**: "Oh, God."

**WWW**: "Had we been any later in finding you, she'd be dead right now. As it is..."

**Abel**: "Is she all right?"

**WWW**: "Abel..."

**Abel**: "_Is... she... all... right_?"

**WWW**: "No. Her body... started to shut down as she lost blood. She... she had already gone into cardiac arrest when I found her, and in severe cyanosis. Thankfully, a local hospital had her blood type in storage, but..."

**Abel**: "Will... will she survive...?"

**WWW**: "I don't know. And... there's no way to tell what kind of... permanent damage she may have sustained. I'm sorry, Abel."

**Abel**: "I want to see her."

**WWW**: "It looks _bad_, Abel, are you sure you want to?"

**Abel**: "Yes."

* * *

**Abel**: "Her hand... it's so _cold_." 

**WWW**: "Careful, don't rub her skin too much..."

**Abel**: "She looks so fragile... so pale..."

**Leon**: "Don't worry. Johanna's a fighter... she won't give up."

**Abel**: "I told her not to do it... begged her not to. But in the end, I... Professor, if anything happens to her, I will _never_ be able to forgive myself."

**Johanna**: "_Fly... a... way... from... here..._"

**Abel**: "She spoke! Johanna, can you hear me? Johanna!"

**Kate**: "She's been fading in and out of consciousness... barely coherent, more like rambling, actually. Each time she surfaces, as it were, she murmurs something, then fades again. She doesn't seem to realize that anyone else is here, she just keeps-"

**Johanna**: "_Here... in... the... arms..._"

**Abel**: "Oh, dear God in heaven..."

**Leon**: "What's wrong?"

**Abel**: "When I was... when I was feeding... she was holding me. And _singing_... singing quietly the whole time... It was like... the song was the only thing sustaining her."

**WWW**: "My God..."

**Johanna**: "_Of... the... an... gel..._"

**Kate**: "So even now-"

**Johanna**: "_May... you... find..._"

**Abel**: "... she's still singing to me."

**Johanna**: "_Some... com... fort... here..._"

_To be continued_...

* * *

_Footnote: Originally, this scene ended differently. (And reading it, you can probably guess how it - and as a result, this whole story - ended.) The inspiration comes from one of the saddest memories I will ever carry in this life... _

_A very dear friend of mine was dying, after overdosing on heroin. By the time I got to the hospital, he was already in a coma. So, with the permission of the emergency room staff, I sat beside him and held him, and knowing how he'd always liked my voice, I sang quietly to him. The entire emergency room seemed to go absolutely still. To this day, I swear he was holding onto my soul with his own, drawing strength... peace... I don't know. Then I 'felt' him let go, and he was gone. _

_And yes, the song I sang to him then is the same one that Johanna sings in this chapter to Abel._


	43. Catching Falling Stars

_Note: I was astounded, touched, and_ immensely _gratified at the reactions from the last chapter - astounded at how many people were moved by it, touched at how many of you offered condolences to me after reading my Author's Footnote... and_ immensely _gratified at how many people just_ loved _the chapter. I was terrified everyone would_ hate _it. Goes to show what_ I _know._

_To answer the question some of you asked about the last chapter - the story Johanna was singing to Abel was "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan (lyrics available online). In this chapter, the song is "Deliver Me" by Sarah Brightman (lyrics also available online). _

_And a new companion tale to "Unexpected Results" is up... check out "A Test of Wills"!_

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part XLIII**

**Kate**: "Look, Abel, you haven't slept in almost two days. Go get some rest. One of us will keep watch over her."

**Abel**: "No... I'm not leaving her."

**Kate**: "You can't do anything more for her than we're all already doing. The rest is up to Johanna now."

**Abel**: "_No_."

**Johanna**: "_All of... my life... I was... in... hiding_..."

**Kate**: "Amazing how she still keeps doing that..."

**Abel**: "How can she _still_ be more concerned about me? Why isn't she worrying about herself?"

**Kate**: "Abel-"

**Abel**: "I was _killing_ her, Kate, and she never once let go of me. So how... how can I abandon her now?"

**Kate**: "You're not abandoning her. But you worn out and exhausted won't do Johanna any good."

**Abel**: "Please, Kate, just... leave me alone with her."

**Kate**: "I understand. Call if you or she need anything."

* * *

**Abel**: "I don't know if you can even hear me in your condition, or if you'd even want to, after what I did to you. But..." 

**Johanna**: "_De... liver me..._"

**Abel**: "How could you do something so... so stupid... and brave... and selfless... just for me? Please, wake up... please open your eyes and look at me... you can't die. _Please_... I'll do anything, _anything_ to make things right again."

**Johanna**: "_Strength from... inside me_..."

**Abel**: "I can't let you die, not like this. You're... you're one of the only people who's ever seen me like that and not... not recoiled in horror or treated me like some monster. You're one of the only true friends I have in this world. Oh, _please_, Johanna, please wake up..."

**Johanna**: "_Wishing... there was... someone..._"

**Abel**: "How did you do it? How did you change my world so much that you've only been in it such a short time, but now I can't imagine it without you? It wouldn't surprise me if your husband felt the same way when he first met you. You never just move through life, do you? You dance through it... race through it... blaze through it like some shooting star. But I won't let your star fade, Johanna... I won't let you fall... damn you, I _won't_ let you die!"

**Johanna**: "_The one to... pull me through_..."

**Abel**: "Oh, Johanna..."

* * *

**Kate**: "I'm worried, William... it's been four days now, and she _still_ hasn't regained consciousness." 

**WWW**: "I know... it worries me, too."

**Leon**: "Just don't mention that around Abel... he's on edge enough as it is."

**Kate**: "He's asleep right now, sitting beside her."

**Leon**: "I've never seen him this torn apart before. He's been at her side, holding her since... it's like he's trying to give her his own life."

**WWW**: "Do you blame him? Abel has never been truly able to come to terms with what he is, and to have brought her to this because of it...

**Abel**: "How can you _possibly_ imagine how I feel right now?"

**Kate**: "Abel-"

**Abel**: "No one... in my life... has _ever_ done... what she did for me. NO ONE. I cannot... I WILL NOT believe that God would be so cruel as to take her from us like _this_."

**WWW**: "However, we must still consider the possibility that Johanna may never recov-"

**Abel**: "DON'T SAY IT!"

**WWW**: "Abel..."

**Abel**: "So you're just going to give up on her?! HOW CAN YOU DO THAT?!"

**Leon**: "We're not happy about this either, Abel... believe me, there isn't a single one of us here who doesn't wish that they couldn't trade places with her right now. But... do you _really_ want her to go on suffering like this?"

* * *

**Abel**: "Oh, please, dear Lord, don't do this... don't take her away... _p-please_..." 

**Johanna**: "Don't... cry... Father... Abel..."

**Abel**: "_JOHANNA_!"

**Johanna**: "No... tears..."

**Abel**: "Y-you little i-idiot, t-they're t-tears of j-joy... oh, t-thank You, God..."

**Johanna**: "You're... all right..."

**Abel**: "_I-I'm_ all right? _You're_ the one who almost d-died..."

**Johanna**: "Told you... it'd be... okay..."

**Abel**: "I... oh, God, Johanna, I'm s-so s-s-sorry..."

**Johanna**: "I'm... not..."

* * *

**WWW**: "You gave us all quite a scare, young woman." 

**Johanna**: "Professor? When did... you get here?"

**WWW**: "Five days ago. Sister Kate and I came as soon as we could."

**Kate**: "And it looks like we'd made it just in time."

**Johanna**: "I had to... do something... to help..."

**WWW**: "Well, I applaud your courage, if not your common sense. You took a terrible risk pulling a stunt like that."

**Johanna**: "You could have... just made me... a hologram... like Sister Kate..."

**Kate**: "Trust me, Sister Johanna, it's not all it's cracked up to be. And you'd be totally dependent on the Professor here, a fate I wouldn't wish on anyone!"

**WWW**: "Come now..."

**Leon**: "How do you feel, Johanna?"

**Johanna**: "Lousy..."

**Leon**: "Not surprising, considering what you went through. But I knew you'd make it - you're too stubborn to die."

**Johanna**: "Thanks for... the vote of confidence..."

**Leon**: "Hey, it's true. But don't do it again, all right? Four-Eyes here was hell to live with while you were in that coma."

**Johanna**: "And I'm hungry... when can I... get off this IV?"

**WWW**: "We're going to keep you on it for another twenty-four hours. After that, we'll be returning to Rome. You need to undergo a complete medical examination, and we simply don't have the facilities here."

**Johanna**: "But... the mission..."

**Abel**: "We've done all that we can here. Thanks to our efforts, we were able to prove to the other Counts that the Vatican was not behind the assassination of Memling."

**Johanna**: "Sorry for... screwing up. God, I... hate failure."

**Leon**: "Hey, don't go blaming yourself. If you hadn't dug up all that information, things would have been a lot worse. You did just fine."

**WWW**: "Indeed. And her Eminence will want to meet with you upon our return."

**Johanna**: "Where's Father Hugue?"

**Leon**: "Hugue is gone again, of course, but as long as he's not stirring up trouble here, her Eminence is satisfied."

**Johanna**: "He left... without saying goodbye?"

**Kate**: "That's Hugue for you. He said something about investigating the Rosencreutz's operations based on that information you'd turned up."

**Johanna**: "Poo-head..."

**WWW**: "I'll take that as a sign that you're at least mentally recovered..."

**Johanna**: "Thanks a lot... Professor..."

_To be continued_...


	44. Romeward Bound

_Note: A lot of you have asked me what the cost was for Johanna to have pulled that stunt saving Abel. And a lot of you have asked about Johanna's exposure to the Methusaleh bacilli. Read on for the answers to both questions._

* * *

**Unexpected Results, Part LXIV**

**Vaclav**: "So, the prodigal nun returns at last..."

**Johanna**: "It's good to see you too, Father. Come to visit the invalid?"

**Vaclav**: "Not just me..."

**Johanna**: "Sister Esther, Sister Noelle, hi!"

**Noelle**: "It's good to see you again, Sister. I gather you've had quite a trying time in Antwerp."

**Johanna**: "That's _one_ way to put it."

**Esther**: "We've been so worried, ever since we got Father Nightroad's reports about what was going on!"

**Johanna**: "God, I can just _imagine_ what Father Abel said about this whole mess."

**Vaclav**: "He actually hasn't talked much to anyone since your return two days ago."

**Johanna**: "I imagine he has a lot on his mind. I mean, our trip to Antwerp was hardly a victory for our side."

**Noelle**: "Don't be so hard on yourself. Things don't always go as well as we'd like them to, but the important thing is that we not give up."

**Johanna**: "I know, I know. I just wish... I could have done _better_."

**Esther**: "You did everything you could! What more _could_ you have done?"

**Johanna**: "I... don't know. All I do know is... I've been asking myself that question for over a week. And I _still_ don't have an answer..."

* * *

**WWW**: "Good evening, your Eminence." 

**Caterina**: "I got your message about Sister Johanna's medical tests. How is she, William?"

**WWW**: "Remarkably lucky, all things considered. She took a terrible gamble when she saved Abel's life. But..."

**Caterina**: "I gather that her efforts were not without consequences."

**WWW**: "I'm afraid so. Although Sister Kate and I arrived in time to save her life..."

**Caterina**: "How bad is it? And be honest, Professor."

**WWW**: "After all our tests... damage to her nervous system, and complications in both her cardiovascular system and immune system."

**Caterina**: "No..."

**WWW**: "Fine muscle control is already more difficult for her, like when she was holding a glass earlier. When she's not looking at her hand, her hand and arm starts trembling. She's also had a hard time picking things up and holding them in just two fingers."

**Caterina**: "I see... and you were saying about her heart?"

**WWW**: "The instruments detected an irregularity in her her heartbeat that wasn't there before. Also, her circulation isn't as good as it was before. She'll have to be careful about her hands and feet; sensation in them appear to be diminished. And as far as her immune system goes... her white blood cell production is less than it should be. She'll be more susceptible to illness."

**Caterina**: "Does she know?"

**WWW**: "I think she suspects. She might not know exactly what's wrong with her, but... I think on some level, she _is_ aware."

**Caterina**: "Very well."

**WWW**: "Um, one more thing, your Eminence. Father Nightroad said that Sister Johanna had been bitten by a vampire while in Antwerp, with the intent of making her one of them. But... there's no trace of vampire DNA in her."

**Caterina**: "At all?"

**WWW**: "None whatsoever."

**Caterina**: "Is it possible that it's just... dormant?"

**WWW**: "No, my lady. Even if she hadn't turned, it would still be there. But there's _nothing_."

**Caterina**: "Is it possible that when she gave her blood to Abel, he removed it?"

**WWW**: "It _is_ a possibility. Either that... or she's naturally immune to the bacilli. Of course, the only way to confirm that theory would be to inject her with vampire bacilli again."

**Caterina**: "That decision will be strictly up to her, _if_ she is willing to cooperate with further medical testing. I _won't_ use her as a lab rat."

**WWW**: "I understand."

* * *

**Caterina**: "Good evening, Johanna." 

**Johanna**: "Eminence! I apologize for not being able to get up."

**Caterina**: "It's all right... how do you feel?"

**Johanna**: "Sick of being poked and prodded, tired of this bland food they insist on serving patients, and still a bit mentally off, but I'll be fine eventually. And the Professor helped me set up a computer terminal in here, so I won't be too bored."

**Caterina**: "I wanted to discuss your recent performance in Antwerp."

**Johanna**: "Yeah, um... I know you put a lot of faith in me when you sent me with Father Abel and Father Leon, and... I'm sorry I let you down."

**Caterina**: "Why do you say that?"

**Johanna**: "Well, it was hardly a resounding success. I panicked under the pressure, nearly got myself killed, we weren't able to stop the Rosencreutz from killing Memling, then there was that whole mess at Our Lady's Cathedral, Father Abel having to rescue me... how long a list do you _want_?"

**Caterina**: "And you think I blame you for any of that?"

**Johanna**: "Well, don't you? It was the height of unprofessional!"

**Caterina**: "Sister Johanna, if you haven't learned by now from being assigned with _those_ two, my definition of 'unprofessional' has to be _quite_ flexible."

**Johanna**: "Oh."

**Caterina**: "Both Father Abel and Father Leon told me about your work in Antwerp. Your intelligence gathering is an invaluable asset to us. Yes, your performance in the field was not quite up to standard, but in time, that _will_ improve."

**Johanna**: "That all depends on when the Professor and the doctors clear me for active duty again."

**Caterina**: "Yes... about that. I'm... I'm afraid that I have some unpleasant news about your test results."

**Johanna**: "I know..."

**Caterina**: "Y-you do? But-"

**Johanna**: "When the doctors got evasive with my questions, I just hacked into the medical database. I saw what was there."

**Caterina**: "I see..."

**Johanna**: "I _don't_ regret what I did, your Eminence. I'd do it again, if I had to."

**Caterina**: "Hopefully, it never comes to that. But, as of now, you will remain on restricted duty until you've either fully recovered, or the exact limitations of your health are determined. Your AX training can continue, but I cannot risk assigning you to the field again."

**Johanna**: "Great... I'm a whole new type of burden now."

**Caterina**: "Sister..."

**Johanna**: "Don't worry, my lady, I just go through these moping fits every now and again. I'll get over it eventually. In the meantime, what _do_ you want me to do?"

**Caterina**: "Well, you'll remain in the medical wing until the doctors clear you, which shouldn't be too long. After that... I intend to turn you loose on the Rosencreutz. Use whatever methods you deem necessary to obtain intelligence about them. I gather you won't be averse to _that_ assignment."

**Johanna**: "Not at all, your Eminence. Not at all..."

**Caterina**: "Good. Now, you should get some rest. I need to meet with Sister Kate about her most recent report to me. It seems there's been an incident in Barcelona..."

_To be continued...  
__... in_ Unexpected Results II: In All the Empty Places

* * *

_End note: So one story arc ends, and another begins. After forty-four chapters, I can no longer avoid the events of canon that wait just beyond, so I will do what I do best... work around them! Starting with the first chapter of_ In All the Empty Places_, the dialogue-only format will be put to rest (now that I know I CAN in fact tell a story strictly in dialogue), as I return to my usual prose._

_To everyone who has so ardently cheered on Sister Johanna Sinclair, __I do hope you'll continue to follow along with everyone's favorite time-bending, trouble-making, techie pagan nun and her madcap misadventures! And don't forget to vote in the poll up on my profile, on how the "Unexpected Results" trilogy should end!_


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